Top 49 How To Communicate With A Man Without Pushing Him Away The 61 Correct Answer

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Contents

How do you get him to say how he feels about you?

How To Get Him To Open Up And Talk About His Feelings
  1. Don’t Assume You Know What He’s Thinking.
  2. Wait Until It’s A Good Time To Ask.
  3. Give Him Space To Respond.
  4. Show Him Appreciation.
  5. Don’t Make Him Wrong For His Feelings.
  6. Notice His Body Language.
  7. Talk About His Interests.
  8. Play Games Together.

How do I stop pushing him away?

If you’re being pushed away
  1. Ask how you can support them. Maybe they need a little more communication, or a little more physical reassurance (like a kiss, embrace, or casual touch) to feel more secure with you. …
  2. Avoid over-reassurance. …
  3. Cultivate patience.

How do you make him communicate more?

Below are 5 tips for communicating better in your relationship:
  1. Ask Open-Ended Questions. …
  2. Pick Up on Nonverbal Cues. …
  3. Don’t Try to Read Their Mind. …
  4. Conversations are a Two-Way Street. …
  5. Set Aside Time to Talk. …
  6. Tell Them What You Need From Them.

How do you give him space and make him miss you?

20 ideas to give a man space to fall in love again
  1. Don’t call or text but be there. This is all about not panicking and not forcing yourself on him when he needs space. …
  2. Reconnect with yourself. …
  3. Be exciting. …
  4. Be empathic. …
  5. Listen to what he needs. …
  6. Self-care. …
  7. Personal goals. …
  8. Sit with your fears.

What’s a deep question to ask a guy?

Deep Questions to Ask a Guy
  • Do you consider yourself an introvert or an extrovert?
  • What are you most thankful for?
  • Which parent are you closer to and why?
  • What are your thoughts on online dating or tinder?
  • What’s on your bucket list this year?
  • How would you describe your best friend?

What drives a man away in a relationship?

Nagging Behavior Makes Men Keep Distance

If there’s one thing men cannot handle, it’s nagging. Nagging is the behavior of repeatedly complaining or finding faults without the intention of actually finding solutions. Don’t be like his mother. This is one of THE MOST surefire ways of driving him away from you.

What to do when he starts to pull away?

There are 7 fool proof steps that you can take to deal with it.
  1. Remain Calm. …
  2. Take Some Time To Reflect. …
  3. Check In With Him. …
  4. When He Pulls Away Do Nothing (Don’t Pursue or Chase Him) …
  5. Focus On Connecting With Yourself. …
  6. Be Open Minded. …
  7. Communicate Your Needs. …
  8. The First Step Is Not To Freak Out.

Why do guys get scared and back off?

Many men don’t know how to manage their feelings. Many men pull away because they are afraid of getting hurt, afraid of coming on too strong, and afraid of commitment. When men pull away, many of them come back. A mature man doesn’t pull away from a woman he likes for very long.

What to do when your man is not communicating with you?

Try being patient about his lack of communication and give him space when he does not want to communicate. You can also try being supportive and understanding. Ask to schedule a better time to talk. Finding a time both of you are comfortable could be the answer to how to communicate with a man that won’t communicate.

How do you engage a guy in a conversation?

Guy Texting Advice: 9 Ways To Keep Him Engaged In Conversation
  1. Be Upbeat. …
  2. Talk About Common Interests. …
  3. Ask Fun Questions. …
  4. Make Him Feel Special. …
  5. Give Him Space When Necessary. …
  6. Avoid Fighting and Drama. …
  7. Make Plans Together. …
  8. Don’t Be Afraid to Flirt.

How do you make a man crave you emotionally?

Here are 5 ways to make a guy fall deeply in love with you and get emotionally attached without playing games.
  1. Date him for who he is, not for his potential. …
  2. Create emotional safety for him. …
  3. Keep things light and playful. …
  4. Be vulnerable. …
  5. Give him space to chase you.

What to text a guy to make him chase you?

How to Make a Guy Chase You over Text
  1. 1 Talk about what you’re doing that day.
  2. 2 Keep some details about your life to yourself.
  3. 3 Ask him thoughtful questions about himself.
  4. 4 Send a fun picture of your location.
  5. 5 Text him the song you’re listening to.
  6. 6 Send him a funny meme.
  7. 7 Give him some sincere compliments.

How do you trigger hero instinct on a guy?

How to trigger Man’s Hero Instinct?
  1. To trigger your man’s hero instinct, you must find ways to boost his confidence. Here are some of the ways mentioned by His Secret Obsession:
  2. Asking for his Help.
  3. Show your Appreciation.
  4. Encourage him to pursue Betterment.
  5. Make sure he knows that He Makes You Happy.

How do you ask someone how they feel about you?

Start by letting them know how you feel about them, then ask them directly about their feelings. For instance, you might say, “I really like you, and I just wanted to know if you like me too,” or “I get the feeling you want to be more than just friends.

How do you get your partner to talk about his feelings?

Here are some tips for you to help your man to tear down his emotional iron curtain.
  1. Pay attention to body language. Guys do show how we feel, even if we don’t say it out loud. …
  2. Show appreciation. …
  3. Do something fun together. …
  4. Talk about things he cares about. …
  5. Don’t make assumptions. …
  6. Be direct.

How do you encourage someone to talk about their feelings?

If you want to know your partner’s true feelings without pressuring them into it, consider one of these 11 ways to get your partner to open up.
  1. Ask An Honest, Direction Question. …
  2. Share Your Own Vulnerabilities. …
  3. Create A Specific Time To Talk. …
  4. Do Another Bonding Activity. …
  5. Be A Good Listener.

Why does he avoid talking about feelings?

The first reason is simple: men often aren’t encouraged to talk about their feelings. In fact, they’re sometimes discouraged from doing so. Additionally, men often tend to shy away from vulnerable conversations. “It’s a little social, but it’s also a little biological,” Vossenkemper explains.


How to talk to a man without pushing him away
How to talk to a man without pushing him away


How to Express Your Feelings to A Man Without Pushing Him Away? – Love Alice Wang

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  • Table of Contents:

Statements that bring a man closer Vs statements that push him away

First understand your own feelings

Here’s an example…

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How To Talk To A Man So He Won’t Pull Away & Go Cold

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Your Feelings Why It’s OK To Want Security

Men And Women Don’t “Communicate” Very Well

How To Express Your Feelings To A Man Avoid This Feminine Bias

How To Talk To A Man So He Will Listen To You

YES There IS A Way To Communicate Your Feelings Without Pushing Him Away

BEFORE You Say Anything At ALL To Him…Say This

HE Is Never To Be Blamed And You Are Never To Be Blamed

The ONE Rule For Talking To A Man About Your Feelings

Express Feelings To Him ACTUAL Feelings

What To Say To Him Next…

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How To Talk To A Man So He Won't Pull Away & Go Cold
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10 Easy Ways To Get Him To Open Up and Talk About His Feelings

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  • Table of Contents:

10 Easy Ways To Get Him To Open Up and Talk About His Feelings

1 Don’t Assume You Know What He’s Thinking

2 Wait Until It’s A Good Time To Ask

3 Give Him Space To Respond

4 Show Him Appreciation

5 Don’t Make Him Wrong For His Feelings

6 Notice His Body Language

7 Talk About His Interests

8 Play Games Together

9 Make The Conversation Feel Easy And Natural

10 Get Him To Open Up By Being Curious and Patient

How To Get A Guy To Open Up About His Feelings

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Pushing People Away: Why It Happens and How to Stop

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Signs

Why it happens

How to start letting people in

If you’re being pushed away

The bottom line

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EVENTS & ENTERTAINING

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How To Ask A Man For What You Want Without Pushing Him Away – Helena Hart Coaching

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Why You Naturally Want To Help Your Partner

Women are relationship orientated whereas men are goal-orientated

Men Like To Try To Handle Things by Themselves First…

For men talking about a problem is an invitation for advice

You Think You’re Helping But You’re Actually Pushing Him Away

It’s Not ALWAYS A ‘One Size Fits All’

How To Stop Pushing Him Away

Is this about MY needs or HIS Is this something that HE cares about or just ME And is this fair of me to put this on him

A Few Final Suggestions To Improve Your Relationship

1) If he doesn’t ask for help – don’t offer it

2) Think before you speak

3) Practice restraining yourself from unsolicited advice

Knowledge is power But only when you apply it

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How To Communicate Effectively With a Man Without Pushing Him Away

Communication can tie us up in knots sometimes.

We often know the right things to say and do, and yet somehow, when a conversation gets just a little too close to one of our “hot buttons” we find ourselves doing all of the “don’t’s” – raising our voices, attacking the person instead of the problem, making accusations, not listening, shutting down, interrupting… and on and on.

This is why the single most important thing we can do while in a difficult conversation with someone we love is to keep our bodies calm.

Ok stop laughing… it really is possible! Let me explain:

I know it feels at times like your partner is on your last nerve, but in truth, you are. To be more specific, you are on your Vagus Nerve. Whenever we have strong emotional reactions the body automatically squeezes the pelvic floor which then pinches the Vagus Nerve. The Vagus Nerve then sends a signal to our brain to turn on our automatic fight, flight, freeze or fawn response, (the Sympathetic Nervous System,) and turn off our thinking brain, (the Neocortex.) Our bodies flood with cortisol and adrenaline, leaving us with that jittery, somewhat out of control feeling.

This is why words you don’t want to say are rushing out of your mouth like a tsunami, and why your partner is trying desperately to get away from you!

Or for some people, this is why you are shutting down and trying to melt into the floor, unable to say the things you know you really need to say. You are angry, or frustrated or sad or feeling threatened, and you are entitled to your feelings! Expressing them this way, however justified, very likely keeps your partner from truly understanding a single thing you are trying to communicate.

At risk of being baldly sexist, I’m going to make a sweeping generalization: Most cishet males are enculturated to take the path of least resistance, and to try and “fix” problems rather than empathize. When faced with a rushing wave of emotional water, a man who is wired this way is likely to run, to minimize, or to say anything he can just to make you stop. I’m going to guess that this was not your goal. You wanted him to hear you and to care, right?

In order to use all of the communication tools you’ve worked so hard to learn, you are going to need to first shift your emotional car into neutral.

In a healthy-enough relationship, when one partner says “when I thought that you (perceived infraction,) it left me feeling really (fill in the blank,)” the other partner is believed. Proving the enormity of the feeling with raised voices, interruptions, inflammatory speech or personal attack, uncontrollable crying, or by withdrawing into a far corner of your mind to stay feeling safe only gets in the way of what you really want to communicate.

Our feelings are chemical firings that come from how we interpret situations. When we intentionally get off of our last nerve, we have the emotionally flexibility to consider a wider array of possible interpretations. We have room to hear the other person’s very different understanding of the same events. It’s also a heck of a lot better for your blood pressure. Once the body is calm we can have a constructive dialogue that leads to important change. We can hear one another. But how?

For the sake of space, I will offer one technique here and give you a link for four others.

The most subtle and probably easiest technique to employ in a difficult conversation is peripheral vision. When we get angry, hurt, fearful, upset or what have you and start into that unhelpful body reaction, our vision literally and automatically narrows. As strange as this might sound, the simple act of softening our eyes and taking in our peripheral vision as widely as possible on either side of our heads sends our bodies the signal that we need our thinking brain engaged and our reactive brain turned off.

Why? Because the Neocortex controls the peripheral vision. By waking our peripheral vision up we automatically relax the pelvic floor and stop the flood of cortisol and adrenaline that’s getting us tangled up in our communication. Using peripheral vision sends the signal to the body and brain that we are safe enough and do not have a use for the reactive brain. It goes to sleep and we can think much more clearly.

The other four techniques for getting off of your last nerve can be found in the “Changing Anxious Chemistry” section of www.mypeace.co/anxiety.

The process of stopping anxiety is identical to stopping the angry, frustrated, overwhelming reactions we have when talking about difficult things with our partners. Practicing these techniques when you don’t need them creates neural paths in your brain so that you are much more likely to recall them when you do need them, even though the area of the brain that stores them is starting to go offline in the presence of adrenaline. You will also lower your overall body reactivity, leaving you physically and emotionally healthier. Some of the techniques can be done while you are in the conversation with your partner, and others are ones you might need to take a break to go do, returning to the conversation when you are more centered and effective.

Please read the articles written by my colleagues on this site in this same section. You will find all sorts of very helpful advice that — now that you can get off of your last nerve — you can use well as you have those difficult conversations with your partner without pushing him away. You’ll thank yourself.

Tiffany L. Craig, MS, LCPC – www.mypeace.co​

How to Express Your Feelings to A Man Without Pushing Him Away?

How can a woman express her feelings to a man without pushing him away?

How can she communicate her feelings to a man so that he understands and doesn’t get defensive?

That’s what we’re going to answer today.

For many women, there are better ways of communicating their feelings to men than they are currently using.

This is especially the case when they are experiencing more intense emotions like frustration, anger and hurt.

The key in being able to connect with your man in those difficult moments is to connect with how you feel, analyze it and accept it before you communicate it to him.

(Click here to take the quiz on “How Naturally Feminine Am I Actually?”)

Statements that bring a man closer Vs statements that push him away

Here’s an example that contrasts the difference between a statement that can push a man away and a statement that can bring him closer.

“I am hurt.” vs

“I am feeling hurt.”

The distinction is subtle, but if you say it out loud you’ll notice the difference.

Pain is universally understood…

This distinction focuses on the fact that while something like “pain” is universally understood, what actually is painful is a subjective matter.

“I stubbed my toe.” is just information. However…

“My foot hurts.” is an invitation to connect.

We all react in varying degrees to a stubbed toe. That stubbed toe may not be an issue to one person, but for another it may be excruciating.

However we can all relate to when something hurts.

We may not agree that a pin prick and a stubbed toe are equal injuries, but we can agree that when something hurts it causes you pain.

CLICK here to discover the one thing you can say to ANY man that will capture his attention, trigger his curiosity and make him hang onto every word you say! (Why is this important? Because the feminine art of capturing masculine attention in a high value way is a skill that no woman can live without.)

First, understand your own feelings

It’s very hard for a man to understand your communication if you don’t first understand the truth of how you feel yourself.

Unwillingness to accept our feelings can result in an inability to share them with a man.

This in turn makes it difficult for others to connect with you, because it’s difficult to understand unless you share a common or mutual experience.

Pain is almost always a mutual experience amongst humans, even if the pain is felt to varying degrees.

This is to say that when it comes to men (anyone in general, but men) extending an invitation to connection is extending an invitation to visit a place of emotion.

On top of that, how we feel about our emotions affects how we express those emotions, and how those emotions are expressed can be high value or low value.

If you want more information on being a high value woman, here’s a great article on that topic.

The truth is that there is more value in an emotional expression that invites connection (for example: “this hurts”) versus one that just conveys facts (“That person called me xyz”)

As a side note, banter (or high value banter) is just using this form of connection playfully and a little more coyly.

Here’s an example…

“Did you slip something in my drink? I’m starting to find you a bit charming”

Versus

“I don’t open up very easily and I have boundaries so it will take a while for me to decide of I really like you. “

Both of these two scenarios have the same innate vulnerability at their deep core, but one shows acceptance of your own emotions, and acceptance of self.

It is also an invitation to share a connection, and the latter example is just plain information.

This reminds me of something the dating and relationship coach D.Shen said: “information is not value.”

Those were some examples of how you can express your feelings to a man in a way that allows you to connect with him, but they can also be examples of how to express your feelings to a man in a high value way.

I hope you enjoyed reading and I hope that these examples helped you.

Alice.

How to Talk to a Man So He Won’t Pull Away & Go Cold

Have you ever gotten involved with a man, and 1, 2, 3 or more months down the track, you just couldn’t help asking him where the relationship is going?

Maybe you got involved with him sexually, and he kept coming close and then pushing you away.

Well, if you’ve tried to voice your feelings and be honest with a man only to feel like he just disappeared, it’s not your fault.

And no, it’s NOT needy to have the desire to know where the relationship is going.

In this article, I’ll show you how how to communicate with a man without chasing him, whilst also honouring your own feelings.

Your Feelings: Why It’s OK To Want Security

It’s what you naturally want as a woman. Just like men try to push for sex, and they naturally want sex, you want to know where on earth a relationship is going!

You want security.

And, there’s a good reason. If you, as a woman, didn’t look for security in some way, then how would you and your children be protected and safe?

Our ancestors needed security for us to be here today. They sure sought it out, and that biological NEED for a woman to seek out security is still there within you.

So there’s nothing wrong with it!

QUIZ TIME: Is your man serious about committing to you? CLICK HERE to find out with this specially crafted quiz! (All the answers you seek about him lie within these 8 questions.)

Men And Women Don’t “Communicate” Very Well

Only, here’s the only problem with getting that from a man:

Men and women don’t “communicate” very well. In fact, miscommunication is the rule between men and women.

That makes expressing your feelings and needs to a man difficult.

I’m sure you know what I’m talking about. As a woman, you’ll gravitate towards having a serious verbal conversation with him.

But what tends to happen during such conversations?

You’ll go ahead and be totally honest about something you feel. In return, he doesn’t say much. In some moments, he’ll look at you with a blank face, not even acknowledging what you said. Just total silence.

This is hard! And the more blank and quiet he is – the more your heart beats faster, the more angry and scared you get. And then what happens? You keep talking, because HE isn’t talking!

Then you may feel him pulling away.

Did he not hear you? Does he not get it? Why can’t he say anything back to me!?

At that point, you’re probably thinking inside your head “OK I obviously haven’t explained myself properly and he doesn’t understand what I’m saying.

So I better explain it in a better way until he GETS it!” And so you keep talking some more – right?

Being the man that he is, he will often respond to you with truths and solutions.

Because his masculine soul is built for problem solving rather than feeling through and resonating with feelings.

(This doesn’t mean he cannot resonate with feelings, he can! It just means he has this bias in communication.)

How To Express Your Feelings To A Man: Avoid This Feminine Bias

Constantly talking until a man understands you is a natural desire of women, but rarely works in creating a deep bond with your man.

A good example of this is in the movie ‘Crazy, Stupid Love’.

Have you seen it? It’s ok if you haven’t, but there is a scene where Julianne Moore is trying to talk to her husband about serious issues, but he doesn’t seem to respond.

So then she escalates the conversation to the point where she tells Steve Carrell that she cheated on him.

To her surprise, he still doesn’t say anything at all in response to her, so she screams:

“Why aren’t you saying anything! You know that only makes me talk more!”

And he responds by saying “please stop [talking]”. She doesn’t stop talking, so he responds by throwing himself out of the moving car.

Yes, really.

Watch it yourself here:

So, even though talking more about your feelings makes you think this will help him “GET” you – this is FEMININE Logic.

We use words. It feels good to us, because it helps us bond (especially with other women).

QUIZ TIME: Are you truly living in your feminine energy? CLICK HERE to find out with my specially crafted 9 Question Quiz!

But the issue with most men is that when you do this, he just shuts down even more. And it’s NOT because you did the wrong thing.

This is not about doing the wrong. This is about understanding more than you did before.

Remember: you are not to blame. You can only make a mistake (which is very different to doing the wrong thing).

So if you do do this thing where you talk even more when he’s silent, it’s not because you are flawed (you can’t be flawed, that’s impossible!), it’s because he is a man.

No matter how much of an asshole he is – no matter how COLD that look on his face is, remember that you still haven’t done the wrong thing.

The bottom line is:

Miscommunication is the rule between men and women.

His body and brain is built to be preferentially better for totally different things than you are as a woman, even though you are both human.

You already know this, intuitively. It’s time to start acting on it.

How To Talk To A Man So He Will Listen To You

So what I have for you today is one of my best kept secrets of making a man relax and stop everything he’s doing to listen to you.

Most of my best stuff is kept for members of my programs as it’s taken me literally years of trial and error to gain this knowledge.

But, I know it’s important for you to feel like you can express your feelings without feeling like he’s going to get angry at you.

So I’m about to share this strategy with you, and hope that unlike most women, you have the courage to put it in to practice.

It’s only a small thing, but most women wouldn’t do it, because they’re too selfish and blinded by their own false ideas of what a man SHOULD be like.

I’ve kept this strategy close to my heart for so long because I wanted to get it tested, and I use it myself first – and it works wonders.

YES, There IS A Way To Communicate Your Feelings Without Pushing Him Away

To do this though, you first have to realise one important thing about communicating to your boyfriend or husband:

Most of the time when you try to express your feelings to him, he is most likely going to feel blamed and criticised even during the times when you are not blaming him or criticising him.

This is just how most men respond to a woman trying to express her feelings, because they are not very far along in their own understanding of women.

It took my husband more than 5 years to finally get this.

So, expect that he will feel like pulling away from you and that he will feel criticized at least half of the times you try to communicate with him.

This is not your fault. It’s just the result of the value differences between men and women in the dating stages.

Until you prove to him that you are not a perpetual value extractor like other women and you won’t BLAME him, most men will shut down when you try to “have a talk”.

Here’s an article on Why Men Pull Away & How To Deal With It As A High Value Woman.

Try to know that a man becoming defensive or feeling blamed is to be expected. Not because he’s a bad guy, but because like most women, you like to communicate in a certain way.

This is what I call a feminine bias in behaviour. Women tend to communicate in a certain way that men don’t always respond well to.

Your best bet is to understand it, and expect it. Not because you’ve done anything wrong, but because of the way you, as a woman, communicate.

He doesn’t communicate the way you do, so even though you’re making sense in your own head, and you feel innocent, he doesn’t quite get it.

So, remember that as a rule. It’s as true as 1 + 1 = 2.

Any man who has ever had any kind of a relationship with a member of the female species will naturally feel blamed and start to pull away when you try to bring something up about your relationship, UNLESS you do what I’m about to show you.

Click here to know how to stay high value when when he pulls away

But I JUST Want To Be Understood!

I know it may feel overwhelming. All you’re trying to do is feel understood!

And the worst thing is – the more you genuinely try to express yourself, and he doesn’t understand, the more emotional you get.

I’ve done this so many times and ended up bursting in to tears just because I wasn’t trying to do anything BUT express myself to him, hoping he would understand.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way with men.

I learned that enough times through seeing my husband’s face go blank and *seemingly* cold and seeing him walk away after I innocently tried to express my “needs” to him.

(Related: The Fastest Way To Push A Man Away)

This kept happening until I discovered this simple sentence to say to my man.

So this is what I want you to do:

BEFORE You Say Anything At ALL To Him…Say This

…Stop yourself, and say this simple sentence first:

“Hey, it’s not your fault, and I’m not blaming you, because nothing is EVER your fault.”

This disarms him first.

And then you go on to say something like this…

But because I respect you, I feel it’s important to let you know that I feel [insert authentic feelings ie: anger, scared, fearful, hurt, sad, out of control]”.

When you say this, he can relax and feel that YOU understand HIM first. You are meeting him where he is at, as a man.

You’re effectively getting inside his mind without him knowing, and saying what he needs to hear from you before you go ahead and share your feelings.

And, if you do this in a genuine way, he will return your gesture by being willing to understand you, too.

(Because as humans we tend to want to give back to those who gave a lot of value to us!)

See, smart women seek to appreciate and understand men first. This is the way to get men to line up outside your door, waiting to date you.

And you can bet your knickers that your girlfriends do not understand men as well as you do if you make the effort to understand men!

Nobody will understand men as well as you do after you take my program Understanding Men. (The promise of this course is for you discover the secrets of the masculine perspective so that you can get through to any man, connect with him heart to heart, and inspire his deepest loyalty and commitment.)

So here’s the catch to using my sentence. Don’t USE that line as a justification for actually going ahead and blaming him.

Don’t point the finger. Don’t sell yourself short like that. You are a woman of high value, so don’t DO that!

We want to always be classy, and take the high road. Do it because you believe in connection, rather than disconnection.

Do it because you have courage. Not because you want to control him.

There are 7 common signs a woman is perceived as low value to all men, because men simply perceive value differently to women. Do you know what these signs are and how to avoid them like the plague? CLICK HERE to download this special report.

HE Is Never To Be Blamed, And You Are Never To Be Blamed

By the way: is it true that nothing is ever his fault?

There may be some things that we can definitely attribute to being someone else’s fault.

But as a general principle, in relationships, you should see this as true.

And for the sake of your relationship lasting long term, you truly have to believe that with your soul.

It’s not his fault.

Just like nothing is ever YOUR FAULT either.

If that sounds weird…I know how you feel. After all, like many kids, you may have felt so blamed for so much, growing up. Surely something is someone’s fault?

Well, to a lot of us, that makes sense. After all, we’ve all been blamed before.

And not to mention how much at fault you may already feel for your past relationships not working out.

But think about how FREEING it is to no longer have to blame anyone – most importantly yourself.

If you can’t not blame anyone, at least start by not blaming yourself.

Here’s the truth – remember this principle for communicating with a man:

Blame equals imprisonment.

Connection equals freedom.

Related: 5 “Must-Follow” Rules For Dating & Relationships For Women.

The ONE Rule For Talking To A Man About Your Feelings

See, this is what I believe, without a doubt in my soul:

Nothing is ever my man’s fault. Nothing is ever MY FAULT.

Making someone at fault is to tie them up with chains, because you’re trying to control them and push them in to a corner.

Do you really want to do that to a man? Or to yourself?

This doesn’t mean you don’t take responsibility – not at all. You should always take responsibility.

But by responsibility, I mean CARING for your man, and caring for yourself. That’s what responsibility is. It’s caring.

But blaming? Blaming someone and saying something is “all his fault” is a lie.

For the sake of the future lasting ability of your relationship, even if you know he did something to hurt you, you must take the focus off blaming and over to connecting.

Whether that be connecting to yourself, so that you feel more accurately how this guy is really treating you…

Or you connecting to him more by showing him your hurt.

Your focus needs to be on connecting with yourself and your own feelings (because your feelings give you much needed information and helps yourself and him calibrate and become closer)…

And if he’s deserving of it, connecting more with him and meeting him where he is at.

If we never make the effort to meet someone else where they are at, if we never make the effort to understand him, then how can we ever communicate our own feelings to him?

it’s important to show allegiance by being on the same emotional page as him, too.

Remember above when I mentioned that when we give to someone else, is makes them want to give back to us?

This is an important principle to remember.

Here’s an article I wrote on The Art Of Creating Emotional Connection With A Man.

Make it a policy that there is no pointing fingers, or at yours.

It just pushes him away.

It’s only a way to make yourself feel secure when you feel like you are not good enough inside.

Related: Do I Push Men Away? Signs You Push People Away & How To Stop.

The Price To Pay For BLAMING

When I was much younger, I used to blame other people. Until later on I realised…

I was actually a miserable, angry wreck by doing that; and I was lying to myself. Thinking it was everyone’s responsibility to make me feel better.

That (people coming to my rescue when I lash out) rarely ever comes.

And if it did come, if someone did take it upon themselves to make me feel better, I wouldn’t feel good anyway. It’d last for 5 minutes and then I’d be back to my miserable, blaming self.

Anyway, back to my point…

You can’t claim to LOVE someone and blame them.

Simple.

Just like that famous saying:

“Blame is drinking the poison and expecting your enemy to Die.”

Recommended Read: 11 Genius Ways To Communicate To An Avoidant Partner.

Express Feelings To Him: ACTUAL Feelings

Now you may be wondering whether there is a correct way to express feelings to a guy…

The best way is to actually FEEL.

What you should do is express and feel what you’re actually feeling. Which is usually something like anger, hurt, sadness, guilt, lonely and scared.

I’ve had clients who have expressed their raw emotions (the real, authentic emotion) and it has genuinely inspired her man to marry her (because the guy heard her communication in a way that he could appreciate, understand and connect to.)

Here’s an article I wrote that will help you with this: How To Be Vulnerable Without Being NEEDY.

And here’s a guide on How To Get Him To Propose Without Looking Low Value.

If you stop for a minute and think, you’ll realise that your raw emotion is exactly where the truth lies.

But many women cover up this truth with manipulating behaviour, lies, and the facade of being in control.

It doesn’t matter how much he has hurt you or how much you have hurt him. The truth still lies in your actual feelings at the moment.

Anger is anger. Hurt is hurt. Fear is fear.

(Related: How To Deal With Fear Of Being Alone And Him Leaving You?)

What Is The One Specific Emotional Trigger Within Every Single Man in this World That Inspires Him to WANT to Commit to One Woman, Want to Take Care of Her, Worship Her and Only Her? Click here to find out right now…

CLICK HERE to discover the ONE PHRASE you can say to ANY man that will capture his attention, trigger his curiosity and make him hang onto every word you say! (Works like magic in a high vale non-needy way!)

What To Say To Him Next…

A word of warning when you say this ONE simple sentence to him:

When you do this, it’s possible that he will do something that frustrates you. Something like this:

Which is, offer suggestions of what you can DO, even after you’ve expressed that you’re simply feeling scared or lonely.

For example, if you say: “I feel lonely”, and he says something insensitive along the lines of:

“Well, why don’t you just call your best friend Sally?”

Or “Why don’t you go out and make some new friends?”

If he does that, say this (again, in a genuine way, don’t say it if you don’t truly believe it. Wait until you really feel it inside before you say it.)

“Thanks, I love that you’re so willing to go out of your way to help me – but there’s nothing to be fixed. These are just my feelings and my feelings will pass as quickly as they came.

Add Some Self Deprecating Humour In

A lot of women are going to hate me for suggesting this, because they take themselves very seriously.

But it may relate to your man very well if you say it, because a lot of men already kind of think that women are crazy. So you will be “entering the conversation that already exists in his mind”.

Here’s what you can say:

I know my feelings seem kind of crazy, maybe it’s just because I’m a woman and we’re naturally crazy, but there’s REALLY nothing to be fixed right now.”

This might make him laugh or smile.

It might mean he’ll look at you with this confused look on his face. Whatever it is, at least you get to feel more influential in your communications with him.

By the way, if you think your man might be emotionally unavailable, here’s a guide I wrote on emotionally unavailable men. You can read it here.

Tired of misunderstanding with your man?

So go ahead, and use what I just suggested to you, and also let me know how you go!

By the way, I’ve just published my brand new program titled “Becoming His One & Only!”… Click HERE to find out more details and how you can get your man to fall deeper in love with you and beg you to be his one and only.

Also! Share your thoughts on this article with me below. I look forward to hearing from you.

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