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3 ways to tell if someone is Gay and to improve your Gaydar
3 ways to tell if someone is Gay and to improve your Gaydar


How could I improve my gaydar? – Quora

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  • Summary of article content: Articles about How could I improve my gaydar? – Quora It is my view that you are either born with a good gaydar or you aren’t, that being sa, it does arguably help if you are rainbowlistically-inclined … …
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How could I improve my gaydar? - Quora
How could I improve my gaydar? – Quora

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How to Hone Your Gaydar to Perfection

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  • Most searched keywords: Whether you are looking for How to Hone Your Gaydar to Perfection Of all the gifts that God supposedly bestowed upon gay men—a dandy fashion sense, preternatural design abilities, a predilection for the … These days with more and more social circles becoming sexually diverse, how can you tell if the guy swinging a glow stick next to you at some Bushwick “rave” is looking to put his pole in a hole or looking for another pole to pole all over his face?
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How to Hone Your Gaydar to Perfection
How to Hone Your Gaydar to Perfection

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5 Ways To Strengthen Your Gaydar and Meet Your Soulmate – Men’s Variety

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  • Summary of article content: Articles about 5 Ways To Strengthen Your Gaydar and Meet Your Soulmate – Men’s Variety The final way to boost your gaydar skills is to practice affirmations. But just repeating a bunch of words in your head alone will do nothing. …
  • Most searched keywords: Whether you are looking for 5 Ways To Strengthen Your Gaydar and Meet Your Soulmate – Men’s Variety The final way to boost your gaydar skills is to practice affirmations. But just repeating a bunch of words in your head alone will do nothing. Learn what gaydar is and how to enhance it to identify men who are attracted to men. Gaydar poll included. Gay is real. How strong is yours?
  • Table of Contents:

Improve your gaydar skills

What is gaydar

Is gaydar real

Do all gay men have gaydar

Gaydar Myths

How to improve gaydar skills

1 Mindful Meditation

2 Be Creative

3 Create a Dream Journal

4 Dance

5 Affirmations

Wrapping Things Up

5 Ways To Strengthen Your Gaydar and Meet Your Soulmate - Men's Variety
5 Ways To Strengthen Your Gaydar and Meet Your Soulmate – Men’s Variety

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The Science of “Gaydar”: How Well Can We Detect Other People’s Sexual Orientation?

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  • Summary of article content: Articles about The Science of “Gaydar”: How Well Can We Detect Other People’s Sexual Orientation? People talk about ‘gaydar’ as the ability to determine whether someone is gay based on their intuition about the person. …
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The Science of “Gaydar”

How Well Can We Detect Other People’s Sexual Orientation

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The Science of “Gaydar”: How Well Can We Detect Other People’s Sexual Orientation?
The Science of “Gaydar”: How Well Can We Detect Other People’s Sexual Orientation?

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3 ways to tell if someone is Gay and to improve your Gaydar – YouTube

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3 ways to tell if someone is Gay and to improve your Gaydar - YouTube
3 ways to tell if someone is Gay and to improve your Gaydar – YouTube

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How to improve your gaydar? : lgbt

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  • Summary of article content: Articles about How to improve your gaydar? : lgbt Be nice to everyone and talk with the fellow patrons. Become friends with their friends. It’s like being here in LGBT Reddit, you may have to put up with a lot … …
  • Most searched keywords: Whether you are looking for How to improve your gaydar? : lgbt Be nice to everyone and talk with the fellow patrons. Become friends with their friends. It’s like being here in LGBT Reddit, you may have to put up with a lot … 19 votes, 20 comments. So this is more or less a question about meeting new people. When I go out, I tend to go to mostly “straight” bars, meaning …
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How to improve your gaydar? : lgbt
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How to Hone Your Gaydar to Perfection

Of all the gifts that God supposedly bestowed upon gay men—a dandy fashion sense, preternatural design abilities, a predilection for the word “fabulous”—the gaydar is both the handiest, and the most elusive. To an outsider (read: straight person), the ability to instantly catalog and assess a litany of small signs and signals and determine whether any old person on the street is gay or straight might seem innate in all who enjoy homosexual romps in bed, but it is actually a learned skill, like algebra or injaculation.

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And you can learn it too! These days with more and more social circles becoming sexually diverse, how can you tell if the guy swinging a glow stick next to you at some Bushwick “rave” is looking to put his pole in a hole or looking for another pole to pole all over his face? [Wait, what?—Ed.]I enlisted the help of Jeffery Self, the author of Straight People: A Spotter’s Guide to the Fascinating World of Heterosexuals. He turned his sociological skills around and instead of telling us gays how to detect breeders, he’s teaching everyone the best practices for finding queers and dykes out in the wild.

VICE: At what types of places or events is it easiest to spot a gay guy?

Self: Oh! I’m so glad you asked, Brian! The easiest places to spot a gay are: Broadway open calls, boutique gyms, one man shows, any major city with a bar named The Eagle, SoulCycle classes, and Kevin Spacey’s Annual Memorial Day BBQ, which, as an FYI, is being moved from Ojai to Brentwood this year. Please read the invitation VERY carefully as no one is allowed to bring more than ONE guest. Last year simply got out of control and Taylor Lautner is literally just NOW able to ride a bike again.

What’s one sure giveaway that the guy you are looking at is gay?

Nowadays it’s very hard to tell the difference between straight and gay men, probably because gay people control the media and ultimately the world. If the guy you’re speaking to refers to screenwriter Dustin Lance Black as simply “Lance,” he is without a doubt homosexual. Another rule of thumb is that if you look at a gay man VERY closely you will see the off kilter glare of a guy who has genuinely wondered why Monique hasn’t made a movie since Precious.

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OK, let’s flip the coin. What’s one sure sign that the gentleman in question is straight?

Do what I always do… surprise him by slapping your penis against his side and see if he shouts “Jesus Christ!” or “Eva Longoria!”

How do you tell the difference between a gay man and the fabled “metrosexual,” or, just, you know, your garden variety European?

Metrosexuals have made everything A LOT more difficult. With the exception of Ryan Gosling, who has, as a rule, made most things A LOT easier. However, a metrosexual tends to try a bit harder than a gay man. Coco Chanel had that famous quote about taking off one piece of jewelry before you leave the house. Gay people are WAY more likely to know this quote/follow its suggestion. On a related note, few metrosexuals have heard of Coco, the Broadway musical starring Katharine Hepburn in the title role and cowritten by one of the guys who wrote My Fair Lady.

Are there different skills for picking out lesbians?

NOT MY DEPARTMENT. I’m sorry. Shall I transfer you downstairs to Ellen and Portia’s Vegan Dungeon?

How can you tell if two girls making out are just drunk straight people or actual lesbians?

Drunk straight girls tend to be WAY messier than actual lesbians. Unless we’re talking about k.d. lang, in which case I have reason to believe she is QUITE messy as well.

Aside from “Do you like penises?”, what sort of questions should you ask to figure out if your target is gay or not?

“Have you ever heard of The Wiz?”

“Have you ever seen The Wiz?”

“Have you ever been in a production of The Wiz?”

“What role did you play?” (This last question is more about my own curiosity, because you seem like somebody who could totally pull off Addaperle.)

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Does the company someone keeps make it easier to spot their sexual orientation? What does someone’s group say about who they want to bone?

Unless it’s Stockard Channing, it’s hard to say.

How can you tell the difference between a really butch gay and a straight guy, or a really femme lesbian and a straight lady?

First and foremost, let me say that butch gay guys are the hottest men on Earth. Period. They also make it hard to tell whether they’re gay or straight. As a rule, most butch gay guys will dress the same as butch straight guys with one exception—the underwear. A butch gay guy can look as gruff and tough as you can get but underneath those distressed Levi’s is a pair of blue trunk cut Andrew Christian briefs.

Femme lesbians vs. straight ladies are tricky for me. Mainly because the straight woman I’ve spent the most time looking at is Dixie Carter, and she’s closer to a butch gay than anything else.

5 Ways To Strengthen Your Gaydar and Meet Your Soulmate

Improve your gaydar skills

Within gay lexicon, there has long existed a slang term called gaydar. Most guys reading this post will know exactly what that word means.

But just case you are unsure, I’m going to give you a basic description that is short and to the point.

What is gaydar?

In its purest form, gaydar is an intuitive, perhaps empathic ability that gay men have to identify a same sex attraction in others.

Related: 10 smart ways to attract a boyfriend

In some ways, this ability can be likened to a sixth sense, falling into the realm of ESP.

Within our gay subculture, gaydar is frequently used in conversation. Here’s some common examples:

I’m pretty sure that hot guy walking his dog is gay. I’ve got excellent gaydar skills.

OR

Wow, I had no idea that guy was gay. My gaydar sucks!

Is gaydar real?

Absolutely! Not only is gaydar real, it has been put to the test of hard science and recorded in peer reviewed journals. In fact, the New York Times ran a piece back in 2012 on the science of gaydar. Here is the article if you wish to review.

Do all gay men have gaydar?

The answer to that question is complicated. That’s because human sexuality is thought to run on a spectrum. According to the Kinsey Scale of Sexual Orientation, people generally fall somewhere on a range.

To help make sense of this, review the graphic below. Zero suggests no attraction towards the same sex. Six represents an exclusive attraction.

I would be remiss in saying that the scale, created in 1948 by Alfred Kinsey, Wardell Pomeroy and others, isn’t without its critics.

But that’s a different blog post, isn’t it?

The main point I want to communicate here is the unique link that exists between gaydar and the scale. The current body of evidence suggests that the higher you rate on the Kinsey scale, the greater your gaydar.

FYI: Gay men aren’t the only ones who have gaydar. Lesbians and bisexuals also have it. Because this is a blog for gay men, I’m using descriptive language that is male focused.

OK – before we talk about improving your gaydar, let’s get a few big myths on this topic out of the way.

Gaydar Myths

First, intuiting sexuality in another has absolutely nothing to do with long standing societal gender roles or behaviors. Sadly, some people believe that a person can “tell” if a man is gay or straight based off ridiculous stereotypes.

That’s complete BS so let’s dispense of this notion now.

Second, your gaydar abilities aren’t “cursed” on you because of “sin” or some other homophobic nonsense. In truth, gaydar is a gift based skill that the universe has bestowed upon you for the purpose of mating and love.

The final myth I’ll speak to is the misconception that a person’s gaydar abilities can’t be grown or fortified. This, too, is false too.

Here’s why:

If you believe that gaydar is a skill, then you must also believe it can be strengthened.

And when you think about it – that kind of makes sense, doesn’t it?

Just as an archer practices his aim with an arrow to achieve greater accuracy, you – as a gay man – can enhance your gaydar skills to detect same sex attractions in others.

That leads us to the big question – how? Well, you’re about to find out.

How to improve gaydar skills

I’m going to give you five simple ways to improve your gaydar skills. Some of what follows comes from personal experience. Other bits of wisdom have been passed on from elder gays.

Read them all to gain the maximum benefit.

1. Mindful Meditation

If you want to dial into others, you will first need to tune into yourself. This means finding a quiet place so that you can cleanse your chakras and still the mind.

If you’ve never meditated before, I encourage you to start out simple. Here is a video below that is perfectly designed to promote inner harmony and peace.

2. Be Creative

Remember, the calmer you are inside, the greater your ability to empathically “see” others. Through meditation, we discover something in the nothing.

When you do something creative, you tap into a part of the brain that is linked to intuition. Creativity operates on linear and abstract plains and empowers you to focus in a way that busy thoughts don’t take over your mind.

Creativity doesn’t mean you have to be an expert at whatever task you are doing. But it does mean that you give this gaydar building activity a chance to flourish.

Consider painting a picture or doodling. Writing, blogging or making photo collages are just but a few examples. When you strengthen your creative skills, you empower intuition.

3. Create a Dream Journal

One of the most powerful ways you can build your gaydar skills is by journaling your dreams. That may sound silly but hear me out.

All of us dream – every night. The problem is that many of us don’t remember the material. But rest assured, just as sure as you are reading this, you absolutely dreamed.

4. Dance

For many people, dancing is a fun activity. But did you know that dancing can also enhance your gaydar skills? Yes, it sure can.

Here’s how:

When you dance, you center yourself in the moment, meaning this very moment in time. When properly executed, you become one with vibration and crate flow.

Gaydar operates on this same concept. You don’t have to be a good dancer either. All that is important is that you try to create oneness with the music. Dance is a conduit to intuition.

5. Affirmations

The final way to boost your gaydar skills is to practice affirmations. But just repeating a bunch of words in your head alone will do nothing.

Instead, you must say things that affirm your truth and in a positive light. Some people combine affirmations with tip number one (meditation).

Example affirmations include: I accept my sexuality. I accept the sexuality of others. I love all of who I am. I am open to healing and self-compassion.

Wrapping Things Up

Gaydar skills are built through practice. It’s a gift that you have been given that should be cherished and respected.

Trust in yourself and your abilities. There will no doubt be times when you get it wrong. Like any developing skill, mistakes happen. It’s part of the learning process.

In time, your gaydar skills will grow to a point that you will easily be able to “tell” what lives in another man’s heart.

What’s more, you’ll be able to draw him to you like a magnet.

The Science of “Gaydar”: How Well Can We Detect Other People’s Sexual Orientation?

By Justin Lehmiller

Gaydar has been the subject of a fair amount of scientific controversy as of late. Some researchers have argued that it’s real, while others have claimed that it’s a myth. So which one is it?

Is gaydar really a thing and, if so, how accurate is it?

People talk about ‘gaydar’ as the ability to determine whether someone is gay based on their intuition about the person. What we’re talking about here are cases where people make inferences about others’ sexual interests in response to minimal information, such as the way someone dresses, walks, or talks.

Dr. Nicholas Rule, a social psychologist at the University of Toronto, published a paper earlier this year in the Archives of Sexual Behavior in which he reviewed the accumulated scientific literature on this topic. Below are of the major takeaways from his analysis.

Most scientific studies of gaydar suggest that there’s something to this idea. These studies have focused on very different types of sexuality cues, too. For example, people seem to be able to detect sexual orientation while listening to short audio recordings, but also while watching silent videos. In addition, they can detect sexual orientation from still images of faces that appear on a computer screen for just a fraction of a second. These wide-ranging findings suggest that gaydar can potentially pick up on everything from one’s looks to movements to speech patterns.

These sexual orientation inferences occur very quickly and seem to reflect automatic responses. In fact, when people are asked to think carefully before making a sexuality judgment, gaydar actually becomes less accurate. In other words, the more people think about it, the worse their gaydar is! This suggests that we don’t necessarily know what it is that we’re basing these determinations on. Further evidence for this point comes from studies in which people were asked why they made specific sexual orientation inferences. It turned out that they often lacked insight, especially when they only had very minimal information to go off of, such as a cropped image of a face that only showed a person’s eyes, nose, and mouth.

Some people seem to have more accurate gaydar than others. For instance, people who hold anti-gay views typically perform worse in gaydar studies; by contrast, sexual minorities and people who have more familiarity.

In a particularly fascinating study, researchers found that women’s gaydar was more accurate when they were ovulating than when they weren’t. Put another way, when women are at peak fertility, their ability to distinguish men who are gay from those who are straight appears to improve.

Most studies of gaydar involve asking people to make either/or judgments: is this person gay or is this person straight? However, in reality, there are far more than just two sexualities out there. So what happens when bisexual people are included in gaydar research? It turns out that people can’t seem to reliably distinguish them as a separate group. Also, when people are given the opportunity to guess a target’s sexuality on a spectrum—a la the classic Kinsey Scale—rather than making either/or decisions, gay and bisexual persons tend to be given pretty similar ratings. This suggests that gaydar really only distinguishes heterosexual from non-heterosexual, meaning it doesn’t necessarily help when it comes to making more fine-grained determinations.

Overall, gaydar helps people make sexual orientation inferences that are better than chance guessing; however, they are far from perfect. Most gaydar studies are set up so that participants would be correct 50% of the time were they to rely on chance guessing. Participants typically do quite a bit better than this, though, with average accuracy rates in the range of 62-64%. Some researchers believe that accuracy could potentially be even higher in the real world, where people usually have more cues and information to go off of compared to lab studies.

Bottom line: The research conducted to date suggests that there is something to the idea of gaydar in that people appear able to intuitively determine others’ sexuality at levels greater than chance in response to a variety of cues. At the same time, though, gaydar is clearly an imperfect tool, and one that doesn’t necessarily appear sensitive to the wide spectrum of sexualities that exist.

To learn more about this research, see: Rule, N.O. (2017). Perceptions of sexual orientation from minimal cues. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 46, 129-139.

—————

Dr. Justin Lehmiller is an award winning educator and a prolific researcher and scholar. He has published articles in some of the leading journals on sex and relationships, written two textbooks, and produces the popular blog, Sex & Psychology. Dr. Lehmiller’s research topics include casual sex, sexual fantasy, sexual health, and friends with benefits. He is currently the Director of the Social Psychology Graduate Program and an Assistant Professor of Social Psychology at Ball State University.

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