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Contents
How can you make someone fall in love with you?
- Make sure you’re what they need. …
- Try to look your best. …
- Be a good listener. …
- Don’t stop smiling. …
- Find out what they’re passionate about. …
- Leave a little mystery. …
- Play hard to get. …
- Mutual friends can be helpful.
How do you trick a man falling in love?
- Ask him for favors. …
- Compliment him … just not all the time. …
- Prolong your eye contact just a little bit longer. …
- Use his name. …
- Mirror his gestures. …
- Don’t be afraid to show him your flaws. …
- Expect good things from him. …
- Let him talk about himself.
How do you make someone fall in love with you 36 questions?
- Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
- Would you like to be famous? …
- Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? …
- What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?
- When did you last sing to yourself?
How do you get a woman to fall in love with you?
- Listen to Her. …
- Compliment Her Looks. …
- Do Not Shy Away from Chivalry. …
- Support Her Decisions. …
- Tell Her How Much You Love Her. …
- Give Her Attention. …
- Nourish the Love between You. …
- Looking Good.
How do you know if someone secretly loves you?
- He stares at you. …
- He acts nervous. …
- He’s around you. …
- He asks personal questions. …
- He disguises his questions. …
- He’s willing to help you. …
- He smiles every time he sees you. …
- He mirrors your body language.
How do you make someone fall in love with you without talking?
- Dance. …
- Send him or her a message on social media. …
- Play hard to get. …
- Text him or her a bunch of messages. …
- Flirt with other people to make him or her jealous. …
- Talk to your friends in front of your crush. …
- Look hot at all times. …
- Pass him or her notes.
How do you make a man want you and only you?
- stop ASKING him about whether he is attracted to other women, and stop FOCUSING on his possible attraction to other women. …
- Every time you notice yourself feeling insecure about other women – or about him not being satisfied – Stop what you are doing.
How do you make a guy miss you badly?
- Let him take initiative. …
- Don’t let him think he has you too soon. …
- Don’t say ‘yes’ to him every time. …
- Make him feel like he can’t live without you. …
- Make the time you spend together amazing so he wants you around more. …
- Make him miss you by not contacting him.
How do you make someone want you more?
- Maintaining eye contact. …
- Be interested in who they are as a person and listen to everything they say. …
- Make them feel appreciated and special. …
- Smile a lot. …
- Touch them more often. …
- Embrace what the other person is most passionate about. …
- Follow Lane on Twitter and Instagram.
How can I fall in love in 4 minutes?
Can you imagine sitting down with a stranger, asking each other 36 questions, staring into each other’s eyes for 4 minutes, and BAM falling in love? Well, according to researcher Arthur Aron, this happened in his lab 20 years ago when he conducted this study.
What are 5 random questions?
- If You Had Three Wishes, What Would You Wish For?
- What Would You Rather Throw Away: Love Or Money?
- What’s The Most Beautiful Place You’ve Ever Seen?
- What Was Your Fondest Memory Of High School?
- What’s Your Favorite TV Show?
- What’s The Strangest Thing In Your Refrigerator?
What is the most romantic question?
- What’s your favorite nickname? …
- What is your conflict style? …
- Why did your last relationship end? …
- What’s your dream vacation? …
- How would you spend one million dollars? …
- Do you like to cook? …
- Do you sing in the shower? …
- What’s your favorite romcom?
How do I win her heart?
- Be pursuant. Pursue her without the pressure. …
- Be a gentleman. Girls don’t want to be treated like a queen, but they do want to be treated like a princess. …
- Be complimentary. …
- Be creative. …
- Be intentional. …
- Speak well of her in front of other people. …
- Be attentive. …
- Be protective.
What makes a woman fall deeply in love with a man?
They desire a sincere, family-oriented, honest, trustworthy, and respectful man. A woman often looks for a man who will treat her with love, care, and respect without drama. Hence, if you want your crush to fall in love, show your best personality to her.
How do I win a woman’s heart?
- Genuinely appreciate her. …
- Look good. …
- Oh, and smell good. …
- Give her your attention. …
- As a rule of thumb, never double text her. …
- Make her feel special. …
- Treat her like an equal. …
- Touch her at the points that matter.
How do you make a guy fall deeply in love with you through text?
Put a smile on his face by sending him a cute little text about something you’re doing and he is not there to share. Or send something sweet and funny to let him know you’re thinking about him even when you’re not together. Men like attention.
How do you make a man love you more than you ever?
- Listen to him. Always. …
- Stay pretty. While your man won’t admit it, he does want to see you pretty at all times. …
- Pamper him with little things. …
- Be his solicited voice of reason. …
- Don’t nag. …
- Value your individuality.
What makes a guy fall in love with a girl?
These three elements provide a man a strong sense of attachment, sexual compatibility, and security, making them fall head over heels in love with you. The support and emotional connection they feel with you also pull them closer, among other things.
how to make someone fall in love with you pdf
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15 Tips on How to Make Someone Fall in Love With You
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Is it possible to make anyone fall in love with you
15 Ways to Make Someone Fall in Love with You
How To Get A Guy To Like You Using 20 Psychology-Based ‘Mind Tricks’ | YourTango
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Though you can never force a person to like you (and should never try even if you could) there are definitely some psychology-based dating tips and advice that can help you learn how to get a guy to like you — and make people think of you more highly in general
If you’re trying to get his attention but aren’t exactly sure how to get a guy to like you give these psychology-based dating tips and techniques a spin
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10 Ways to Make Her Fall in Love With You All Over Again
1 Listen to Her
2 Compliment Her Looks
3 Do Not Shy Away from Chivalry
4 Support Her Decisions
5 Tell Her How Much You Love Her
6 Give Her Attention
7 Nourish the Love between You
8 Looking Good
9 Good Date Ideas
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How to make someone fall in love with you: Based on the psychology of falling in love – Kindle edition by Radwan, Farouk. Health, Fitness & Dieting Kindle eBooks @ Amazon.com.
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15 Tips on How to Make Someone Fall in Love With You
When we fall for someone, all we can think about is how to get them to reciprocate our feelings. But, can we make somebody fall for us just like that? ‘Why do people fall in love and ‘how to make someone fall in love with you’ are questions as old as time.
However, what makes you fall in love with someone is somewhat confusing, and how do people fall in love anyway? Are there science-backed strategies to make anyone fall in love with you?
If there were, why do some people stay in the friend zone after trying every trick in the book? In this article, we’re going to answer these questions for you while exploring 15 psychological tricks that can help you increase the chance of making someone fall for you.
Also try : Am I in the Friend Zone Quiz
Is it possible to make anyone fall in love with you?
Can you make someone fall in love with you? The simple answer would be yes. But is that even possible? Then what about love at first sight? You might wonder if an emotion like love can be created in someone when they initially weren’t head over heels for you.
While many people believe that falling in love is a coincidence or fate, over the years, science has proved that love, like any other emotion, can be controlled to a certain extent. Let me explain what that means.
While you can’t cast a spell on someone and make them fall for you, you can increase the chance of someone starting to fall in love with you with some scientifically proven techniques.
However, since the human brain is the most complex organ in our body, what works for one human being might not work for another. All you can do is use the following tools and hope for the best.
As long as the other person has some feelings for you, it may be possible to make them fall in love with you.
Related Reading: How to Tell Someone You Love Them
15 Ways to Make Someone Fall in Love with You
Here are 15 ways to increase your prospects of making someone fall in love with you.
1. Make sure you’re what they need
While you’re wondering how to make someone fall for you before anything, make sure to figure out if you’re compatible with them. Find out what they’re looking for in a partner. There are some non-negotiable traits people want their potential partners to have.
We’re not talking about things like the way they dress or the color of their eyes (those might be non-negotiable for people as well). To some people, their partner must share the same religious beliefs and similar values as them.
If you meet those criteria or are willing to make changes to meet them, you’re good to go.
2. Try to look your best
If you find yourself thinking to yourself how to make someone love you, start with prioritizing self-care. When you start to eat and sleep well, get some exercise every day, and improve your overall physical appearance, it helps you be your best self.
Find outfits that flatter your figure and make you look your best. That way, you start to seem more attractive and confident, which might be precisely what you need to make someone fall in love with you.
Related Reading: 5 Essentials to Cultivate Physical and Emotional Attraction
3. Be a good listener
Not only because you want them to fall for you, be genuinely interested, and figure out who they indeed are, inside and out. Let them talk about their interests, hobbies, dreams, and aspirations. Don’t interrupt them when they talk.
Being a good listener makes you more attractive in people’s eyes.
4. Don’t stop smiling
Did you know that smile makes you more attractive and confident? Research has shown that a smile, aka a happy facial expression, not only makes you look more attractive and appealing, but it can also even compensate for relative unattractiveness.
So laugh at their jokes and smile a lot. Also, try to make them laugh. A good sense of humor may be what you need to get your crush to fall madly in love with you.
5. Find out what they’re passionate about
This is a crucial step in making someone fall in love with you. Try to get to know them on a personal level. Figure out what makes them tick. When they talk about something that makes their eyes twinkle, that’s what they’re passionate about.
Let them talk about it and make them feel heard. If you share the same passion already, tell them that. Otherwise, show genuine interest and try to learn more about it.
When we meet people who share our passion for music, food, sports, or anything for that matter, we immediately feel more connected to them.
Related Reading: Simple Things That Can Bring Couples Closer
6. Leave a little mystery
No matter how much you feel like telling your date every little thing about yourself, please don’t give away all your secrets the first time you talk to them. Listen more and say less. Leave them wanting to know more about you.
Get an air of mystery to appear more intriguing and attractive.
7. Play hard to get
If you’re wondering if playing hard to get works, well, it does. Research shows that playing hard to get makes you more desirable in the eyes of your potential love interest.
If your crush thinks that winning you would be a challenge, it may increase their desire to put effort into getting closer to you.
8. Mutual friends can be helpful
Have you got mutual friends? Well, having friends in common means you already have a trusted source to vouch for you. On top of that, your date’s mind will subconsciously keep telling them that they can trust you since you’re already friends with their friends.
If your friends like you and have many positive things to say about you, it increases your chance of making someone love you.
Also Try : My Friend Like Me Quiz
9. Look into their eyes
You may feel nervous while talking to your crush and tend to look away. But, maintaining eye contact is an effective way to make someone fall for you. Be around them and every time your eyes meet, overcome your eye contact anxiety and let them look into your eyes.
Related Reading: Importance of Nonverbal Communication in Relationships
10. Touch them casually
When you’re around them, let your fingers brush against theirs or casually touch their shoulder, elbow, or arm. Touch is a powerful tool in your arsenal if you can use it correctly. It helps you develop and increase intimacy between you and your crush.
11. Be a good friend to them
While you’re busy getting someone to fall in love with you, make sure to be their friend first. Be supportive in a non-condescending way so that they can feel closer to you. Be a positive influence in their life and motivate them.
Present yourself as someone who adds value to their lives and see them falling madly in love with you.
12. Don’t try too hard
While being persistent isn’t necessarily a bad idea, constantly chasing someone might make you look desperate. What makes people fall in love differs from person to person. So, some people might like the chasing and see that as a reflection of your interest.
You might scare others off by doing it. That’s why it’s a good idea not to come off as too eager to make them feel like you’re suffocating them.
Related Reading: Importance of Saying I Love You and How to Express It
13. Find a balance
How to make someone fall in love with you when you’re advised to play hard to get and be in their vicinity at the same time? You’re not supposed to be at their beck and call, but you can’t leave them hanging as well. So, what do you do?
Try to find a balance and be available when they want to meet up or talk to you. But not always. Distance makes the heart grow fonder, remember? So, instead of always being around, give them a chance to miss you sometimes.
14. Choose hot over cold
Studies have shown that there’s a correlation between our body temperature and psychological status. You’re more likely to appear friendlier and warm when holding a coffee cup instead of an ice-cold glass of water.
So whenever you get together or go on a date, instead of having cold drinks or ice cream together, order coffee or any other warm food that you two like.
Related Reading: 7 Awesome Ways to Create Memories with Your Partner
15. Mirror their body language
When you display the same body language, facial expression, and gestures as someone, it makes them like you more and develops good interpersonal relationships.
So, mirror your crush’s movements to increase your chance of making them fall for you.
However, it’s better to imitate them in a way that doesn’t make them feel uncomfortable.
You can watch this video to learn how to flirt with someone you like:
Conclusion
No matter how much you want someone to fall madly in love with you, make sure not to lose yourself in the process. Show up as your true authentic self, and don’t try to change yourself to get them to love you entirely.
Put in the effort, try out the techniques, and keep an open mind. The rest will work itself out.
How To Get A Guy To Like You Using 20 Psychology-Based Techniques
I honestly believe that love is something that can be cultivated … to a point.
There has to be a spark of interest there at first, but how deep someone falls in love with you will often be a result of the effort you both put forth to make that feeling happen.
Though you can never force a person to like you (and should never try, even if you could), there are definitely some psychology-based dating tips and advice that can help you learn how to get a guy to like you — and make people think of you more highly in general.
These psychological “mind tricks” are even backed by science.
According to Relationship Coach and YourTango Expert Marilyn Sutherland, a true love relationship is based on total trust and safety — not tricks.
“If you use mind tricks to get a man to like you unless you adopt them as new relationship habits, they are likely to backfire. Be honest about who you are for them,” says Sutherland.
“Be honest about who they are as a potential life partner. Consider how they treat you, consider your needs if you can ask for what you want, be open with them, and feel safe. Be sure you can be there 100% for them.”
If you’re trying to get his attention but aren’t exactly sure how to get a guy to like you, give these psychology-based dating tips and techniques a spin.
1. Ask him for favors.
Studies have shown that people tend to like people who they do favors for, even if they initially hated them.
This is because we subconsciously make ourselves believe that the person would do the same for us as we did for them.
This reverse psychology phenomenon is known as the Ben Franklin Effect, since the Founding Father himself was the one who discovered this strange trick. As he wrote in his autobiography: “He that has once done you a kindness will be more ready to do you another, than he whom you yourself have obliged.”
2. Compliment him … just not all the time.
Most guys don’t get complimented frequently, so when they do hear a compliment, they tend to eat it up.
The only problem is that compliments lose their significance if you hear them all the time.
By spacing out compliments to a max of once per day, it keeps him on his toes.
3. Prolong your eye contact just a little bit longer.
It’s true. Studies have found that prolonged eye contact increases the likelihood that two people will fall in love.
The man behind the groundbreaking research on this subject, social psychologist Arthur Aron, says, “the two biggest factors to falling in love through eye contact are i) the other person is reasonably appropriate and desirable, and ii)” there is also reason to think they might be genuinely interested in you.
4. Use his name.
The names we’re given are music to our ears.
Hearing your name being said by someone is an ego boost, albeit a small one.
Studies have shown that hearing your own name has a unique effect on brain activation, as our “brains involuntarily respond to the sound of our own names, even in a state in which we are unable to respond to or act on anything else. What could be more powerful than that?!”
5. Mirror his gestures.
One of the most common ways that people show a connection to someone is to subtly copy their gestures. This is actually done on a subconscious level when it’s a seriously natural jive.
Psychologists have noticed that you can actually create a closer bond by mirroring someone, even if those gestures are done totally consciously.
Who knew?
6. Don’t be afraid to show him your flaws.
A lot of women tend to want to hide their flaws and look “perfect” as a way to attract men.
Though you definitely don’t have to show all your flaws immediately, showing him that you occasionally goof up makes you human to him… and it also shows him that you’re not a fake.
7. Expect good things from him.
Among psychologists, this is known as the Pygmalion Effect and it says that we tend to mold to the expectations that people set for us.
If you think he’s a jerk, then you’ll behave in a way that will encourage him to be a jerk, even if it’s on a subconscious level.
So, expect him to be good to you and he will be better to you than if you expected him to be a twerp.
8. Let him talk about himself.
People love to talk about themselves. We are our own favorite subjects, even if we aren’t all narcissists by nature.
By asking him questions about himself and getting him to open up, you’re getting him to like you more by indulging him in his favorite topic of conversation.
According to Sutherland, the best thing you can do is listen and practice “intentional connection.”
“I have practiced ‘intentional connection’ for 25 years. It’s a way of connecting to anyone, including a man you are interested in, in an authentic, caring way,” Sutherland explains. “You look at them, listen to what they are saying (not planning what YOU want to say), show true (not fake) interest in what they are saying; don’t pretend you like rodeos, or baseball if you don’t. Be someone you are not and when they say they like or love you, you know they don’t because they don’t know you. Be YOU. When they love you, you know their love is real!”
9. Have a life outside of him.
Do you know who loves being with a woman who makes her man the center of her universe? Abusers and people who are way too insecure to have a healthy relationship.
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By showing him that you’re an independent woman who is balanced and not desperate for spending time with him, you’re giving him the green light to pursue you without worrying about you becoming a Stage 5 Clinger.
10. Show that you have similar values, hobbies, and traits to him.
Studies show that we tend to fall in love (or associate) with people when we share similar values and backgrounds as them, a phenomenon known as Similar/Attraction Theory.
So, if he’s a rebel, it’s a good idea to show your rebellious side. If he’s a family guy, talk about how important your parents are to you.
11. Be ready to walk if he doesn’t reciprocate.
Nothing is as sexy as a girl who values herself enough to stop chasing a man.
Good luck and be ready to walk if he doesn’t reciprocate feelings. You never know; he might come around.
12. Ask him for his opinion and advice.
A guy will always appreciate you asking for his opinion on something or his advice because it gives him a sign that you respect him and want to know from him first about something.
It makes him feel good about himself and great that you’re asking him for that information.
13. Be inviting and warm.
According to a study from Harvard Business School professor Amy Cuddy in her book “Presence,” if you can be warm and competent then people will feel comfortable with you.
You definitely want to act warmer and inviting towards this person that you like because you can let them know that they can trust you and talk to you about anything.
14. Touch him casually.
Slight touches on the body when you’re with the guy you like can make them psychologically feel warmer towards you.
You can give small touches like touching him on his back, arm, shoulder, or leg as they are likely to exchange the touch and give you something back in return.
15. Smile more.
A study by researchers from Stanford University and the University of Duisburg-Essen found that people report a more positive interaction with someone when they are smiling and when you smile when you meet someone, chances are they might remember you more later on.
Smiling can also lead to a more positive communication experience and that can be helpful when you’re wanting the guy you like to like you back.
Smiling more often can signal to him that you enjoy his company and your time together and he will most likely reciprocate the feelings if he smiles back whenever you smile at him.
16. Tell him a secret.
If you engage in small talk with the guy you like and maybe tell him a secret you haven’t told anyone before (or so as far as he knows), that will make him feel important and much closer to you.
17. Show him that you can keep secrets.
The same goes with the last trick but it’s best that you let him know that you can also keep secrets as well.
This will make your bond even stronger because you can form real trust if you can actually prove that you’re loyal.
Trust is everything in a relationship and keeping his secrets or showing that you have kept others helps him open up to you more easily and help persuade him to like you even more.
18. Show your sense of humor.
A guy likes a lot of banter and when a woman has a sense of humor.
It makes a man feel more attracted to a woman and it can also make the person that you like, like you more according to a study from researchers at DePaul University and Illinois State University.
The study also showed that participating in humorous tasks or events can increase romantic attraction as well.
19. Simply act like you like him.
This shouldn’t be too hard because if you like him, all you have to do is show it!
Give him clear indications that you like him by complimenting him and telling him certain things that you do like about him.
If he’s not picking it up then it might be best, if you think it wouldn’t scare him away, to be honest, tell him you like him, see what happens, and let him make a move.
20. Be vulnerable.
This is probably the hardest trick as being vulnerable can be scary — but it helps almost always to make a guy like you.
If you are letting him know your feelings and showing him how vulnerable you can be, that’s very attractive to a man.
In a study from Illinois State University and California State University at Los Angeles on Partner Preferences in Romantic Relationships and Friendships, results found that expressiveness and openness are very desirable and important traits that both men and women look for in their partners.
If you are being your vulnerable self and showing them who you are, that can be very attractive to a man. He most likely wants to be with a woman who is unapologetically herself and isn’t afraid to show her true colors.
Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer based out of Red Bank, New Jersey, who writes primarily about lifestyle, food, finance, and relationships. Find her on Twitter for more.
36 questions to fall in love
“Tell your partner something that you like about them already,” is precisely the 31st question I ask this normally very casual guy over video chat. We’re two hours and thirty minutes into this call, road-testing the ’36 questions to fall in love’ theory. He tells me he likes my smile and I can’t help but blush at that response. When it’s my turn to answer, I share something more superficial, telling him I like his body, everything about it in fact and, in that moment, I feel a sense of shyness that I didn’t expect.
36 questions to fall in love
First formulated in 1997 36 questions to fall in love is a study by psychologist Dr. Arthur Aron which took place at Stony Brook University, New York. The aim? Speeding up the creation of intimacy between two strangers. Dr. Aron carried out the test by uniting a heterosexual man and woman together and presenting them with a list of 36 questions to try out, all finished off with four minutes of sustained eye contact. Reader, this couple got married just six months later.
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Divided into three sections, each set gets increasingly intimate and personal. From ‘Question 1: Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?’ to ‘Question 36: Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.’
The objective of the study is to explore the social psychology of relationships and create closeness, although Dr. Aron states that the intimacy is only intended to be transitory in nature. So, there’s not actually an expectation to immediately fall in love as soon as the 36th question is answered, though you should feel something. Right?
“I’ve never put much store in the idea of love at first sight”
Before testing the study out for myself with a guy I used to date (I really wanted to try out these questions and had no one else to ask, okay?), I was curious but also cynical. I’ve never put much store in the idea of love at first sight or really got it when characters in movies become obsessed with one another within three days, so I wasn’t expecting a miraculous surge of adoration to wash over me. Instead, I was eager to discover something new about someone I already knew and ask questions I wouldn’t tend to ask.
The advantage of the structured 36 questions
Our answers to ‘Question 9: For what in your life do you feel most grateful?’ was the same – family, while ‘Question 16: What do you value most in a friendship?’ revealed our compatible need for thoughtfulness and having people around us that have our best interests at heart. These questions were some of my favourites.
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There are three questions out of the 36 that centre friendship, including ‘Question 20: What does friendship mean to you?’ and ‘Question 27: If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.’
I personally think that a good romantic relationship should have a good friendship at the foundation as the friendship element is what makes your bond strong, meaningful and genuine, not attraction and a couple of shared interests.
“The questions provide you access to finding out whether you feel comfortable and safe”
It was particularly useful for us to have a list in place with questions neither of us had created or over analysed. I spoke with relationship psychotherapist, Matt Davies, who seconded this notion for first-time daters. “When you’re first meeting, if you don’t have a structure, what you’re doing is you’re generating all kinds of superficial chat,” he says.
“Psychologically you’re assessing, ‘Do I like this person or not? Do I feel safe with them?’ But, with that out of the way, the questions provide you access to finding out whether you feel comfortable and safe with them.”
Unlocking vulnerability
The 36 questions are key in unlocking that vulnerability and genuineness that a lot of people struggle to show generally, let alone when seeking love.
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Questions like ‘18: What is your most terrible memory?’ (my answer nearly made me tear up) and ‘30: When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?’ tested how honest and open we could be with one another, which aren’t traits that are often explored early in a potential relationship, due to fear of opening up or sharing personal things ‘too early’.
Dr. Davies says, “Psychological intimacy is a prerequisite for passion. [The questions] allow people to understand that we’re all human, and that is so connecting. It’s the opposite of alienation, where we might think somebody is better than us or we’re one down or one up. I think that is really important to help with intimacy.”
And ignite intimacy it did – while we were already comfortable and familiar with one another, we both learnt something new. Forget the simple things like our favourite colours or favourite movies, we unlocked deeper, emotional experiences such as my sister being in the hospital being one of the worst times of my life and him crying in front of a previous partner.
Do the 36 questions to fall in love work?
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The initial cynicism I had definitely eased up as the questions progressed, although I didn’t like every single question due to their vagueness and repetition. However, perhaps that’s what’s needed. The vague elements of some questions allowed us to be as open-ended as possible, while the repetition of the questions that asked us to say positive things about one another fulfilled my biggest love language.
Once we finished the questions, we joked about whether we were in love yet. Well, we’re still not dating but the enhanced closeness we felt has got to mean something.
Full list of 36 questions to fall in love
Set I
1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?
5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
Set II
13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?
15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
16. What do you value most in a friendship?
17. What is your most treasured memory?
18. What is your most terrible memory?
19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
20. What does friendship mean to you?
21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?
24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
Set III
25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling …”
26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share …”
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.
29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?
34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
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