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Table of Contents:

Step By Step On How To Spank Your Husband

Reasons To Inculcate The Habit Of Spanking Your Husband In Your Marriage

Tools You Can Use To Spank You Husband

FAQs

Conclusion

Spanking Your Husband (The Ultimate Step-By-Step Guide)

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Step by Step To Spank Your Husband

Reasons To Inculcate Your Husband’s Habit In Your Marriage

How to spanking Paddles

How to spank using the spanking paddle to your husband

It would be best if you used instruments to spank your husband

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At the mention of the word “spanking”, what might come to mind is the picture of a stubborn child whose parent slaps his bottoms for misbehaving.

However, spanking, here, is used for the purpose different from this perspective.

Similar to talking dirty to your husband, spanking your husband can help create excitement, rekindle love, and getting the best out of a relationship.

Husband spanking has been dubbed by many health experts to be one of the ways in which you- as the wife- can get to add spice to your relationship, keeping intact the respect, loyalty, and love which are meant to be consistent in it.

There is no doubt that erotic spanking might bring about some little pain, but that appears to be less of an issue if done the right way, as the delight derived from it surpasses the pain. However, describing with one word the pain and pleasure derived from spanking is close to impossible. The closest description appears to be the one given by Gloria Brame. In her opinion spanking, “has more to do with the delightful sting and the delightful warmth and the delightful vibrations that it sends through the whole region,”

In the opinion of KC Spanks Club founder Rich Spankman, spanking simply put is “delightful.”

Spanking is not a punishment unless you want it to. How then do you make spanking your husband a memorable one? How what are the steps that are required and the best practices for achieving great spanking that will leave you and your husband breathless and crave for each other like the way a Redbreast butterfly dots around hibiscus flowers.

Step By Step On How To Spank Your Husband.

Spanking your husband might be a bit hard if you are not accustomed to it. However, the following procedures will take you by the hands and walk you through the perfect way you can spank your husband. Let’s go!

Prior agreement:

You and your husband must have had a prior agreement before doing this to him. It would not be funny if you attempt spanking your husband, and the next thing he does is to walk away, or feels he’s being disrespected. This was what the Sex expert and commentator, Coleen Singer was getting at when she said, “Taking control or giving up control are both roles that require a mutual understanding in advance of what the goals and limits are.”

Rule:

Your husband needs to be aware of the rules guiding the erotic spanking. Below are a few examples of rules you can adopt for this purpose:

When caught cheating.

When he breaks the family budget plan

He ignores you for no reason.

When he transfers aggressions on you.

When he uses foul languages

When he’s caught lying

When caught masturbating with your permission

When he fails to call when he is late to coming home, and so on.

Timing:

Timing for spanking your husband shouldn’t be of the essence; you can decide to start it anytime, but it is logical if you spank your husband the time close to the infraction, as this will have more effect on him as to the reason of you spanking him.

Position:

This is the best way to position your husband for spanking. Have him lay across your lap, and spank him, increasing the pressure each time? Ask him if he’s been bad — he’ll say “Yes,” if he wants you to keep going. You don’t have to experiment with costumes, but it could be a fun and fresh way to keep things spicy in the bedroom. He could put on short knickers, and you could wear a plaid miniskirt, for example.

Reasons To Inculcate The Habit Of Spanking Your Husband In Your Marriage.

Management of differences:

Spanking your husband can greatly help you as the wife from over-reacting to the occasional misbehaviors of your husbands. When you spank your husband in this regards, you end up releasing that bitterness; yet, you won’t be resulting to rejection which is the ultimate weapon mostly employed by most wives whenever they are dissatisfied with their husbands.

Enhances communication:

Normally, before you can begin to spank your husband, you two must have had a prior agreement. Doing this, the two of you tend to naturally understand how a good interaction ought to be in the cold light of day. Your husband will begin to appreciate the fact that roles played by him in the relationship are just as important as that which is played by you his wife.

Respect:

According to DarlingPropaganda, it is good to “always play with a safe-word so the spankee can let their spanker know if things get too intense.” Unconsciously, by sticking to this rule, you are training your mind and that of your husband to focus on being considerate and selfless with each other.

It facilitates equality of freedom in your relationship:

The general idea is men are supposed to be in charge of everything, including sex-related decisions with their partner, principle which I strongly disagree with, as it goes to affect your freedom as a wife. You ought not to be pressured into anything by warped ideas of what your sex life should be like, and by spanking your husband, you get in your hands the deserved equitable freedom in your relationship.

Spanking your husband makes you and him feel the natural glow of happiness.

The thigh butt of your husband should considerably be part of where you need to twinkle while spanking him. This spot when hit releases dopamine which is capable of making us happy and crazy about our partner said a psychotherapist, Dr. Karen Mann

You can only punish your husband to satisfaction through spanking.

Men are moved by strength and fierceness. Women who punish their husbands in a frank manner take over and win their loyalty and adoration. When you employ the traditional method of subjecting your husband to punishment- neglecting him, you are most likely to be hurting yourself the more.

Using a bare hand to spank might be a bit painful, considering the fact that you are dealing with one of the tendered parts of the body of your husband. You are not looking to punish him like a prisoner either; you are merely spanking him to express your hurting, and at the same time to avoid complicating issues with your husband; therefore, using tools that are purposely designed for spanking is a good idea as this will offer the best result. Enough of all these talks! Let’s dive into the toys!

Spanking paddle:

This is a lightweight spanking paddle. This lightweight makes it easy to wield. And one good thing about this spanking paddle is that it comes in different designs and for different sensations. In all, it’s a perfect toy for you if you’re new to the spanking world, and you would like to explore it.

How It Feels

A spanking paddle is made from faux fur, and it leaves on the spanked area less pain, and the feel of it is close to that of a body massage. You don’t get a stinging sensation from this spanking paddle unless it is made from materials such as wood, had leather, and silicon.

Another thing you need to understand is that when you spank your husband bottom, focusing on a part of it alone, you are most likely to be causing him more pain than the one he gets from when you use a large spanking paddle.

Try the different types of the spanking paddle with your husband to ascertain which of them suits him the most.

Is it like pulling teeth getting him to spend time with you?

The key to solving is understanding men on a much deeper emotional level. The number #1 factor that causes men to behave this way is actually relatively easy to change with a few subtle things you can say to him. Watch this free video that explains how you can become his priority!

How To Spank Your Husband Using A Spanking Paddle

Spanking paddle with two sides is the best to pick if you are looking to explore with the aim of choosing the one that offers you what you want. And don’t forget that the best part of the bottom is to aim for while spanking is the thigh and butt. This will ensure you keep things safe and nice.

Flogger:

Look more of a long string-link material connected to a handle; only the tips of the strings are expected to touch the targeted area when you spank your husband with a flogger. The technicality it requires in terms of its usage makes it a bit more complex to use and more of a design meant for the pros.

How It Feels

The amount of pain your husband gets when flogger is used on him will depend on how it’s the flogger is made, and most importantly the manner with which you spank him. To have a hang on of how to use the flogger, local sex shop may have some books on this. You can also try exploring YouTube; there are tons of videos that will teach you how best to use the flogger.

Check the following YouTube links to access some of the tutorials:

Flogger tutorial How to (Part1) BDSM skills ep. #5

How to use a flogger

Basic Bondage: Flogger, and so forth.

I’m not affiliated with the channel owners in any way; they are merely recommendations. You can go on to search on YouTube for more videos related to how to use the flogger on your own.

The basics of using a flogger go thus: your wrist motion does the most part of the job here. It’s the only way to avoid spanking your husband in his thigh or butt with any part of the flogger other than the tips of the flogger’s tail.

However, before you start spanking your husband with the flogger, ensure you have practiced using it on a lifeless object, and you have perfected your skills of using it.

Also, try not to start with floggers made from hard objects; I will recommend you start with floggers made with faux fur because when you use them later on your husband bottom and you hit the wrong part, it might cause him more pain than what you have expected.

A Tickler:

Ticklers are known for their ability to be used at a considerable distance due to their long length. They have been described to offer more sensation to the receiver’s body compared to other spanking tools. Tickler comes in different types: soft suede strands, feathers, metal beads, rubber strands, and so forth.

How It Feels

The tickler just as its name implies gives the receiver a tickling sensation, and the reason for this is no more than the soft and gentle feeling it leaves on the body. However, if you use a tickler violently on your husband bottom, it may lead to more of burning sensation on his body. So, you need to use your tickler in the right manner to avoid this.

How To Use A Tickler

For a better result when using a tickler to spank your husband, you need to avoid tight holding, instead apply slight pressure, and run the tickler softly across your husband’s body. And don’t forget to aim more at the sensitive areas – the thigh and butts.

A slapper:

When you use a slapper to spank your husband, expect to hear slap-like sounds. This sound will have you thinking your husband is being subjected to some crazy punishment, but ironically, he’s not; in fact, the experience your husband will most likely get is that of fun.

The slapper is made from pieces of numerous materials. These pieces hit one another when in use to create what I would call an erotic sound.

How Does A Slapper Feel?

Hard hit on the bottom results to pain; however, the impact will not be as serious as what you would have if flogger made from wood or silicon is used in this same manner on your husband’s bottom.

When you use it lightly on the body, it feels soothing, but no matter how light you use it, you can never take away the fun-filled slapping sound.

Ridding crop

When you take a good look at the riding crop you will notice it consists of a cane and a paddle. It is a multi-purpose toy. It can be used as horse whips; it can as well be used on human beings for the erotic spanking to induce sensational feelings.

How Does A Ridding Crop Feel?

Your husband might experience any of these feelings when you use the riding crop to spank him- feeling close to a mild tap and a painful feeling. Whatever feeling it is your husband will get will depend on the level of force you apply while you spank him.

How To Use A Ridding Crop

If you hit your husband’s bottom with the tips of the riding crop lightly, he gets a protruding sensation. On the other hand, if you hit his bottom with the tips of the riding crop, but this time, hard, he gets a very painful sensation. However, you can spank his bottom with the iron part, but know that this can feel as intense as your regular cane. so, use this part with less force while spanking your husband.

A whip

Length of a whip is the longest of all the spanking tools. It’s more complex to handle than other tools, and as such it’s not designed for the beginners.

How A Whip Feels

Whips are naturally designed to offer painful sensation. So, if your husband doesn’t enjoy one, it’s best to avoid spanking him with it. However, professional whip users can use it on the body and it will barely touch the body, let alone leaving marks on it.

How To Use A Whip

Due to the painful impact whip could leave on the body, it’s advised you are well trained and have mastered how to use it before spanking your husband with it.

FAQs

How Do You Spank Your Spouse? If you are looking to make your relationship a bit more exciting speak to your spouse about what he likes. Have an open conversation about what he does and doesn’t like and if he is open to this then try it. How Do You Discipline Your Spouse? You should not feel as if you need to discipline your spouse. If you are experiencing relationship issues then it is important to have an open conversation with him about how you are feeling so that you can resolve these issues together as a couple. What Does It Feel Like To Spank Someone? This may add some excitement to your relationship if things have got a bit boring recently. However it is important to talk to your spouse about what he likes and wants before you try anything new that he may potentially not like. Why Do Adults Like Getting Spanked? Some people do and some people don’t. It is important to speak to your spouse about what he likes and what he doesn’t like before you try anything that he may take the wrong way. Having an open conversation with your partner about things will really help things. Why Do I Want To Punish My Husband? This is not a good sign if you feel like you want to punish your husband. If you are not in a healthy relationship anymore it may be time to start thinking about walking away. Have an honest conversation with him and if you can’t work things out then it may be time to call it a day.

Conclusion

Just like when parents won’t hesitate to give their child the six of the best for mothering off, you shouldn’t give it a second thought to spank your husband when you feel he deserves ones. Even though spanking could come with a sting-burn on men, but the relieve it offers his body and that of yours makes it sufficient to say it’s another subtle but potential health improving method that is as effective as an anti-oxidant.

And “according to research and polls, more than half of both men and women are turned on by spanking during sex.” -Menshealth

This should tell you that you are not only improving on the sex life of your husband but also satisfying him by adding some spices to it. When your husband is happy with you half of the battle which exists in a relationship is won already. So, go girl! Do some more spanking on him!

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How to Spank Your Husband? Best 5 Ways With Step by Step Guide

How to Spank Your Husband? Best 5 Ways With Step by Step Guide

How to Spank Your Husband? Inculcate Your Husband’s Habit In Your Marriage, Improve Communication, Tickler. How to Spanking wife(spanked wife)?

When mentioning spanking, the defiant kid’s image whose parent knocks the ground for misbehaving is likely to come to mind. But the spanking, in this case, is used for reasons other than that.

Like talking dirty to your husband, it helps build passion, stimulate love and bring the most out of a friendship. Many health professionals have called husband spanking to be one way to make your company spicier, keeping intact the respect, commitment, and affection you are expected to be compatible with.

There is no question that romantic spanking will inflict some discomfort, but it seems less concerned if the correct approach is to handle since the delight goes beyond the pain.

The pain and pleasure derived from spanking are, however, almost difficult to explain in one word. Gloria Brame seems to have the nearest explanation. “has something to do with the fun sting and the pleasant warmth that it sends across the whole world,” says she is spanking.

Step by Step To Spank Your Husband:

If you are not used to it, it might be a little difficult to spat your husband. However, the following procedures will be taken and walk in the direction you should spank your husband.

Position:

This is your husband’s only way to pull together. Has he laid over your lap and fucked, increasing every time the pressure. Ask him if he is wrong — if he wants you to stay, he will say “yeah.” You don’t have to try on costumes, so it can be a fun and new way to keep stuff in the room spicy.

Rule:

The rules guiding erotic punching must be mindful of your husband. Below are some examples of practices for this reason that you may adopt:

When the trickery caught. When the family budget plan is disrupted. For whatever excuse, he doesn’t neglect you. If he passes threats on you. When it uses nonsense When he’s going to cheat If your consent is taken to masturbate When he’s late to come home, he doesn’t call, and so on.

Timing:

You will wish to start your husband at any time, but it is reasonable to put your husband near the crime to further affect him because of your spanking.

Prior arrangement:

Before you did this, you and your partner should have already decided. The next thing you do will be to leave or feel disrespected, and it would not be funny if you wanted to span your husband. Coleen Singer, a sexist expert, and an analyst said this when she said, “The two positions that involve a shared agreement in advance of goals and bounds are taking control or giving up control.”

Pros of spank your husband:

Right-fitting can be very good. It jiggles anything nice in the right direction. Spanning will reduce the span and spanking discomfort. I have read multiple people often say that they only have to be in tears to feel better. For sexual purposes, I like this, but something you want. It’s something else to add to the routine of the bedroom. There’s nothing like a new fire activity.

Cons of spank your husband:

If you are not vigilant, this can become a form of violence. Ensure all of you are adults who agree; if stuff gets out of hand, use a protected term. Be polite, generally speaking. You will not be able to sit down based on the amount of spanking severity. If you have to work in the morning, it is not always ideal. It’s not my suggestion to hurt one another. Taxation Spinning can cause odd complications. I’d echo respect everywhere.

Reasons To Inculcate Your Husband’s Habit In Your Marriage:

Regarding:

It’s nice to “play with a safe word all the time, so that the Spankee can warn her spanker if things get too strong.” Unconsciously, you learn to be considerate and selfless with one another by keeping this code: your spirit and that of your husband.

Differences management:

Pumping up your husband will help you as a wife to overreact to your husbands’ occasional misconduct. When you spit your husband on this, you unleash this bitterness; however, when their husband is disappointed, you will not result in a dismissal which is the ultimate tool often used by women.

Improve communication:

Usually, you two would have reached a prior understanding before you can proceed to spank your husband. This helps you two realize instinctively how a good interaction can be in the cold sunshine. Your husband will begin to understand the importance of his roles in your relationship, as is your wife’s part.

How to spanking Paddles?

This paddle is thin and sweeping. This lightweight allows handling. And one positive thing about this paddle is that it’s available in multiple styles and sensations. Overall, if you’re new to and want to discover the hustling world, this is a beautiful toy for you.

How to spank using the spanking paddle to your husband?

Paddling a two-sided paddle is the safest option to choose whether you want a paddle to explore to choose what you want. And don’t ignore that the essential part of the bottom is the leg and the ass. This means that things are safe and friendly.

It would be best if you used instruments to spank your husband:

The idea that you are coping with one of the tenders in your husband’s body could be a little uncomfortable if you have a pure hand to span. You don’t want to penalize him like a hostage either; you inspire him to talk out your hurt while preventing complicating things with your husband, so it is smart to use instruments designed to solve it to give the best outcomes. Both these talks are sufficient. Let’s all immerse ourselves in the toys.

Tickler:

Ticklers are popular because of the long duration of their ability to be used at a vast distance. They have been identified to give the recipient a higher sensation than other pivoting gadgets. Tickler comes in various styles: light suede beaches, feathers, metal beads, rubber beads, etc.

Bottom Line

Much because parents won’t hesitate to give their child six of the best for mothering when you believe that your husband deserves one, it would help if you didn’t give it a second thought. While it can come with sting-burning, the relaxation it provides the body with and yours suffices to suggest that it is another subtle but possibly better tool for health that is as powerful as an antioxidant. These guides are intresting and helpful about spank your husband.

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How To Spank Your Husband For Kinkier Sex (BDSM Guide)

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While the media might make it seem like it’s always the wife who takes a spanking, there are plenty of wives who enjoy spanking their husbands!

Why Spank Your Man?

Some of our male readers have even asked how to get their wives to spank them. If you’re ready to join the legion of wives who spank, read on to learn everything you need to know about how to spank your husband.

There are several reasons why you might want to spank your husband including:

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Training submissives

Reinforcing submission

Discipline/punishment

Satisfying a masochistic or sadistic urge

Relieving tension within a relationship

Trying to add a bit of kink or spice up your relationship

As you can see, many of these reasons pertain to BDSM or power-exchange relationships. Many people do consider spanking to be kinky. But it’s not always the best way to discipline your husband as you’ll learn in a bit.

Related: 23 Kinky Sex Ideas To Try Tonight

Still, spanking is a pretty tame and common kink, all things considered. And it doesn’t have to be part of a BDSM dynamic if you don’t want it to be. Some people like spanking just because they like the intensity it brings or they incorporate it as part of rough sex.

In the end, it doesn’t matter why you spank someone as long as they’re a willing participant. This brings us to our next point.

How To Introduce Spanking

Related: If you want to give your man back-arching, toe-curling, screaming orgasms that will keep him sexually addicted to you, then you’ll find them in my private and discreet newsletter. You’ll also learn the 5 dangerous & “dumb” sex mistakes that turn him off and how to avoid them. Get it here.

If you’re lucky, you might be able to skip this section because either your partner suggested that you spank him or the two of you have already discussed the issue and agree it’s something you want to try together. But just because you haven’t talked about it yet or aren’t sure how your spouse feels about it doesn’t mean you can’t have a conversation that leads to an amazing time!

There are several ways you can bring up new things to try in bed. Because spanking is pretty “safe,” some people don’t talk about it beforehand at all. They simply give their partner’s backside a swat during sex or an erotic massage to see how it goes. However, it’s always appropriate to have a dedicated conversation. Your hubby might have trauma surrounding their body or have a physical condition that makes pain especially unbearable.

Talk about sexual fantasies – One way to see if your husband will let you spank him is to start a conversation about sexual fantasies and desires in general. Instead of only one of you getting what you want, you can explore ways that you can have a more satisfying sex life together.

Keep it light – Pick a time and place when you’re in neutral-to-positive moods with enough time to discuss the subject. Although sex can be heavy, this doesn’t have to be a serious conversation. Instead, it can be light, fun, and even sexy! If you want, you can turn it into a game. Whether store-purchased or DIY, sex dice and Truth or Dare can be your road to spanking. A little alcohol also goes a long way to both of you opening up about your sexual fantasies.

Getting past his “ego” preconcieved ideas – Some guys are brought up to think that they must always be in charge, they must stay in control and that being submissive in any way is “weak”. Getting past this societal programming can prove tricky and varies from man to man. One way to get past it is to take things slowly, gradually building up to what you ultimately want while praising him as you do it.

Playfully spanking him when he’s been a “bold boy” while also complimenting his butt is a good first step. Then the next time he is particularly cheeky or flirty, tell him that he’s going to get a good spanking for it. Going further, you could then spank him during sex and judge his reaction to it.

Ultimately, this slow approach can be a bit frustrating though as you may get stuck at a particular step and never get past it without his defenses coming up.

Spanking might be something that you want to try because you desire being dominant in the bedroom, so you might need to have a broader conversation. On the other hand, you might already be in a kinky relationship and plan to use spanking as a form of domestic discipline. If so, you may need to have a conversation to decide on the correct punishment for each offense.

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How to Spank your Man Safely

Once you’ve established that spanking is something you want to try, set some ground rules to ensure you stay safe and on the same page. Those ground rules will differ for everyone but consider the following:

When it’s okay to spank

What you’ll use to spank (your hands or a belt or flogger, etc)

How your partner can end the spanking if he’s not into it

If it’s okay to leave marks.

Traffic light system – You can easily accomplish the last by using a safe word. The traffic light system works well because we’re all familiar with it. Green means go, yellow means slow and gives you a chance to check in, and red means stop. You can even practice having your husband use a safe word.

Learn more about safe words in this post about BDSM rules & safety.

Establishing Spanking Rituals

Some people also like to use rituals, which work especially well if you’re into BDSM. They can help you get into the mindset of your role. If you’re interested, the following are some common rituals your hubby or partner can do.

Preparing the room (sounds, smells, sights, etc.)

Wearing certain clothing or accessories, such as a collar, or stripping naked

Waiting for you in a specific position

Positioning themselves over your lap, typically known as over-the-knee or OTK

Using honorifics such as “Ma’am” or “Mistress”

Really, you can incorporate any ritual that works for you, but you’re not required to use rituals. Feel free to skip them if they’re not your thing.

The Physical Act of Spanking

You might think you’re ready to spank your husband if you’ve read this far, but slow down! Doing things incorrectly can cause physical damage or leave you both feeling a lot of regret. It’s pretty easy to avoid, however, with some common sense.

Find Your Spanking Position

The classic over-the-knees position works well for spanking, but you’re not limited to it. Your husband can bend over the bed or another piece of furniture or get on all fours. He can even lie on his stomach or stand. If he struggles to remain in the same position, resting on memory foam pillows can make it more comfortable for him. After all, you only want controlled pain, not accidental discomfort.

Many of these positions work well with bondage too. You can tie him spread eagle to your bed with under-the-mattress restraints, have him lean over a sex swing, or use doorway cuffs. For those kinksters who are really into the lifestyle, the St. Andrew’s Cross is a type of furniture that keeps your spouse trussed up while standing spread eagle. Of course, you don’t need any furniture to make spanking work.

Discover: What is bondage.

No matter what position your man takes, it’s important that he can be relaxed. If his body is tense, spanking will hurt more than it should.

Always Warm Up

Now, you’re finally ready to spank. There are a few things you should know to get into the swing of things.

Practiced kinksters will tell you to spank in layers, especially when you’re brand-new to spanking. The first few swats will be milder, and spanking over his clothes before removing them and spanking his bare bottom lets you build up intensity without overwhelming your partner.

Start softly & slowly – Your first spankings should be a gentle warmup. You’re just getting started. Start softer than softer and increase slower than slow. There’s always room to go harder, but you can’t take back a spanking that’s too much.

When spanking, you’ll generally make contact with your husband’s skin with the palm of your hand. Although, you may sometimes switch things up.

Which part of his butt? – Aim for the fullest part of his butt, which can handle more stimulation. Approximately 80% of your swats should land on the roundest part of the buttcheeks, being careful not to hit the tailbone. You absolutely don’t want to hit above the butt or near the kidneys. However, you can add a few swats to the crease between his butt and thighs and the backs of his thighs.

Hit this, not that – You can occasionally swat his upper arms, or chest, but you want to avoid any areas with little padding where your hand can hit bone. Unless he explicitly asks, avoid his genitals.

After a few hits, switch to his other cheek. You’ll soon find your rhythm, literally. Your man should be warmed up and can lose a layer of clothes (if he has any left) and proceed to more intense spanking.

Pro Spanking Tips

Now that you’re all warmed up, you can increase the intensity. Using your hand makes it easy to tell exactly how much force you’re using. Plus, it’s incredibly intimate.

You might still want your husband’s feedback, especially when finding your footing. Try a “How does this feel?” or “Do you like this?” You can also have him rank how intense each spanking feels on a scale of 1-10. You should also pay attention to your husband’s body language.

Spanking doesn’t need to be monotonous. There are plenty of ways to keep it interesting, and you might already have some ideas. You can add them to these ones:

Alternate between spanking, rubbing, and squeezing. Not only does this give your husband’s cheek a break, but your hand can rest, too.

Experiment with your hand flat and cupped. A flat hand makes a slapping sound, while a cupped hand sounds a bit more impressive.

Have your spouse count each spank.

Instruct your man to thank you after every swat.

Make your husband ask for more spankings. Command him to say, “Please spank me again mistress.”

Talk dirty with your husband while spanking him. Try complimenting him while he’s taking the spanking, the shape of his butts, or his body in general.

Alternate between gentle and harder spanks.

Wear a glove or sock (silky, rubber, scratch, etc) or wrap your hand in fabric when spanking your husband.

Hold a string of beads or another textured item in your hand.

Use the back of your hand to spank your husband.

Stroke your husband’s penis or have him stroke himself while you spank him.

Even More Impact Play

This section could also be called, “I spank my husband, now what?”

By now, you’ve got plenty of tools in your spanking arsenal, but there are still a few more things you can try, including impact play toys. Remember that when using a toy, you don’t get the same feedback as you do with your hand. It’s much easier to hit harder than you think.

You’ll find several options available.

Paddles are commonly made from wood, leather, and sometimes silicone; they may be coated with fur, leather, or other materials. Paddles with holes are more intense.

are commonly made from wood, leather, and sometimes silicone; they may be coated with fur, leather, or other materials. Paddles with holes are more intense. Floggers have multiple strands, are usually made of leather, and can be softer.

have multiple strands, are usually made of leather, and can be softer. Tawses have two layers. The first one hits the skin, followed by the second like an aftershock.

have two layers. The first one hits the skin, followed by the second like an aftershock. Riding crops are thin rods with a leather loop on the end.

are thin rods with a leather loop on the end. Canes are thin rods that cause intense pain.

are thin rods that cause intense pain. Whips have just a single tail. Longer whips can break the sound barrier–and your partner’s skin. They’re definitely not for amateurs.

It’s important to learn how to use your tools. For example, only the loop of a riding crop should make contact with your partner’s body. You can find plenty of tutorials on Youtube, and a pillow makes a fair target as you’re getting used to using a specific implement. You can also practice on your own body, which gives you an idea of the toy’s intensity.

Lower the intensity – You can decrease the intensity by wrapping your items in fabric or slipping a sock over them.

Practice makes perfect – Practicing will help you perfect your swing and learn how to close to stand, which is especially important with whips and floggers that can easily wrap around your partner’s body and inflict unwanted pain if you don’t aim right.

Leaving a mark – You’ll notice that different toys leave different marks. Generally, broad toys leave large red areas while narrow ones cause smaller welts. Toys with sharp edges can break the skin. You might be surprised at what’s sharp enough to cut your partner, so carefully inspect your toys and start gently when you spank or discipline your husband.

When using the most intense toys, your partner may only be able to handle a few swings. Canes, for example, are incredibly intense. Your partner’s endurance may increase over time, but you should absolutely respect your partner’s limits. It’s not your body getting spanked. Plus, spanking can feel emotionally intense.

DIY Impact Play

One of the exciting things about impact play is finding new things you can use to spank your husband with. There are truly tons of goodies you can find in your own home; although, some people want to purchase dedicated items for their bedroom games.

The following are a few items people have used to spank their partners.

Mixing spoons

Belts – with caution

Spatulas

Shoes

Rulers

Shoes

Fly swatters

Books

Hairbrush (backside)

Truth be told, just about anything you can hold in your hand and control reliably can be used for impact play, even a clothes hanger.

If you like this advice, check out these other femdom ideas.

A note on belts – Belts are common spanking implements in the movies. They can work for erotic play, but you should only use the end or the folded center and never the buckle or clasp, which can seriously hurt your partner.

Ending the Scene

Unless your husband has used his safeword and you’ve suddenly stopped spanking, you might not know how to end the scene. One way to fix this area is to spank him a predetermined number of times. For example, you might spank him 10 times, then wrap up.

Erotic spanking can also last as long as your husband can handle it. As he approaches his limit, you can ease up on your spankings until you end by gently spanking or rubbing his buttcheeks.

When you use spanking for discipline, it ends once your partner has learned their lesson. You can wrap up with the scene such as your man taking a certain position or by leaving the room yourself. Removing blindfolds, gags, and other bondage can also signify that the scene is over.

Sometimes you’ll switch from spanking to other kinky or sexy activities.

Aftercare

An important aspect of any BDSM activity is aftercare. It helps you return to equilibrium. Aftercare guides typically focus on submissive or receiving partners, and it’s easy to see why your spanked husband might need a little TLC. However, occasionally the dominant/top or giving partner needs aftercare too.

Skincare – You’ll find a number of creams and balms designed to be applied after spanking. They soothe the skin in the moment and can reduce the likelihood of bruises or marks remaining. Massaging them into your partner’s skin can be a great bonding moment. You can use any soothing lotion. Arnica and aloe are both soothing.

Some people like to use products containing Vitamins A or E or straight up Vitamin E oil. However, these ingredients can be irritating. Similarly, you’ll want to avoid anything containing alcohol or urea unless you’re trying to cause more pain. Products containing cooling menthol can also hurt after a spanking session.

Other popular forms of aftercare include cuddling, offering a snack or drink, and napping. Some people prefer to be alone after a scene, but you don’t want to leave your husband completely alone. If he experiences subspace, he might struggle to speak for a short while.

Hours & days later – Aside from immediate aftercare, some people like to offer aftercare in the hours and days after a scene in case their partners experience any negative emotions later on. You can discuss how the scene went over the next few days and make sure to have intimate moments that reinforce your emotional connection with your husband. Some people even like to go for ice cream a few days after a scene as part of aftercare.

Related: The Complete BDSM Aftercare Guide

Your husband might prefer to sleep on his stomach or side for a day or two after you spank him. Body pillows may help him stay in a comfortable position.

If your husband develops bruises after a discipline session, ice packs, colloidal oatmeal baths, and epsom salts can all provide relief.

If it turns out that the damage is worse, then he may want to speak to his doctor.

Avoid Common Pitfalls of Spanking

While this guide to spanking teaches you how to safely and even creatively spank your husband, there are a few issues we haven’t yet addressed.

For both partners to enjoy spanking, you generally need to do it for the same reasons.

When spanking is bad for disciplining him – If you spank your man and he finds it erotic, it’s not a good discipline option. He won’t see you as a strict, dominant wife.

When he tries topping from bottom – If you’re in a BDSM or TPE relationship and your husband continually breaks rules, he might be trying to get you to spank him. Some people consider this topping from the bottom because the submissive is trying to control the scene instead of following the rules of being a submissive. It’s better to find ways to incorporate enjoyable activities into play and reserve true discipline for correcting behavior.

An easy solution is to discipline your husband with an implement he doesn’t normally like. That way, he’ll see you as strict and know how serious you are about him learning his lesson.

On the other hand, if you enjoy spanking or whipping your husband for erotic reasons, look for other methods when you need to discipline your husband.

Related: 16 BDSM Punishments for Effective Behavior Training

However, open communication ensures that many wives who spank get exactly what they want out of the activity–and so do their husbands!

Psst, if you’re not into strict roles, check out this guide to gentle femdom.

Congratulations on making it this far and being willing to learn how to spank your husband! Not every wife is willing to try new things, but spanking your husband can bring you closer together and make your sex life more satisfying. Of course, spanking isn’t for everyone, and some women prefer to receive spankings than to give them. It’s all about finding what works for you.

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