Top 50 How To Win Back An Infj The 184 Detailed Answer

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Communicate openly and be willing to listen, but don’t go overboard. Your INFJ doesn’t need you to ask them about every thought they have throughout the day. They just want you to listen when they do have something to say. Anything that isn’t you or that you don’t intend to continue long-term should be avoided.Make it clear to him/her that you are REALLY sorry for what you have done. Never say the word ‘Sorry’ if you don’t really mean it. INFJs value truthfulness and can sense the emptiness of the words if you fake them. It is important to assure him/her that the mistake made by you will not be repeated.

When we connect with someone, this truly is a magical moment for INFJs.

Connection Surpasses Introversion or Extroversion. …
Here are 4 steps to deep connection in INFJ relationships:
Make the time. …
Unconditional attention. …
Three magical sentences. …
Be vulnerable. …
Get The FREE INFJ Relationship Guide. …
Over to you.

23 INFJs Explain Exactly How To Win Their Type Over

“Approach me like a cat would to an unknown object. …
“I need to be able to trust you. …
“Actively listen and engage in conversation. …
“Answer all my questions honestly – and don’t make a move too soon. …
“I usually feel an affinity towards someone right away or not.

7 things you should never say to an INFJ

“Calm down!” As we’ve just found out, INFJs are highly sensitive. …
“You’re just not trying hard enough.” …
“I’m fine.” — when you know you aren’t. …
“No one will ever understand you.” …
“You’re doing too much.” …
“You make it difficult to love you.” …
“You’re so boring.

Contents

How do you reconnect with INFJ?

When we connect with someone, this truly is a magical moment for INFJs.

Connection Surpasses Introversion or Extroversion. …
Here are 4 steps to deep connection in INFJ relationships:
Make the time. …
Unconditional attention. …
Three magical sentences. …
Be vulnerable. …
Get The FREE INFJ Relationship Guide. …
Over to you.

How do you win an INFJ heart?

23 INFJs Explain Exactly How To Win Their Type Over

“Approach me like a cat would to an unknown object. …
“I need to be able to trust you. …
“Actively listen and engage in conversation. …
“Answer all my questions honestly – and don’t make a move too soon. …
“I usually feel an affinity towards someone right away or not.

How do you say sorry to INFJ?

Make it clear to him/her that you are REALLY sorry for what you have done. Never say the word ‘Sorry’ if you don’t really mean it. INFJs value truthfulness and can sense the emptiness of the words if you fake them. It is important to assure him/her that the mistake made by you will not be repeated.

What should you not say to an INFJ?

7 things you should never say to an INFJ

“Calm down!” As we’ve just found out, INFJs are highly sensitive. …
“You’re just not trying hard enough.” …
“I’m fine.” — when you know you aren’t. …
“No one will ever understand you.” …
“You’re doing too much.” …
“You make it difficult to love you.” …
“You’re so boring.

What upsets an INFJ?

Because INFJs are so naturally aware of harmony levels and emotional needs, they are irritated by people who seem tactless, rude, mean-spirited, troll-ish, or unnecessarily disruptive. In situations where someone is corrupting the emotional atmosphere for their own selfish gains, an INFJ can become severely angered.

How do I make my INFJ open?

What INFJs Need to Open Up to Others

Don’t flinch, no matter what your INFJ shares with you. …
Don’t let your INFJ down, and when you do, give them a proper explanation. …
Integrity is a trait that INFJs admire and trust very much.

Will an INFJ make the first move?

INFJs can definitely have a hard time making the first move with someone they don’t know well. They often enjoy observing and getting to know someone before they feel inspired to make that advance.

How do you tell if an INFJ loves you?

INFJs tend to be guarded about their physical space, except for when it comes to family and VERY close friends. If they’re finding excuses to touch your hand, bump up against you, or hug you, then it probably means they have feelings for you.

Do INFJs like to be pursued?

We don’t want to burden others. We don’t want to bother anyone, when we ourselves value peace and alone time so much. It’s true, we INFJs like to be pursued. That way, we know we’re really, truly wanted.

How do you tell if an INFJ likes you over text?

Signs an INFJ Likes You Through Text

They’ll text you constantly. They may, when they get really desperate, text you an entire novel. They’ll try to keep the conversation light-hearted. There will be a number of jokes, changes of subject, and sometimes avoiding the subject altogether.

Do INFJs fall out of love easily?

Warm and caring, it may be surprising to learn that INFJs cut off relationships quickly. The rarest personality type in the Myers-Briggs system, INFJs are typically warm and caring people. But it may be surprising that they’re also known to cut off relationships quickly — see the infamous door slam.

Can INFJ forgive?

INFJs often struggle with forgiveness, especially when someone has hurt them multiple times. They will usually forgive someone over and over again, until they cannot take it any longer. Once an INFJ has reached this point, they have a hard time letting go of their grudge.

What hurts INFJ the most?

Here are just eight of the ways INFJ react to an often overstimulating world.

INFJs are easily overwhelmed by bright lights, strong smells, scratchy fabric or loud noise. …
They need a lot of sleep, time to themselves and downtime to recharge their batteries.

How do you get an INFJ to like you?

How to Love an INFJ

Hugs are important. …
Your encouragement matters. …
Remind us to take care of ourselves. …
Take an interest in our creative pursuits. …
Be honest. …
Appreciate our occasional adventurous side. …
Be “alone” with us.

Can you manipulate INFJ?

As a young idealist growing up and looking for the best in others, INFJs are easy to manipulate. Life experience is necessary for INFJs to see that people have different agendas and intentions. Some seem better than others.

How do INFJ handle breakups?

It is important for the INFJ to push aside this natural desire to neglect their own emotions after a break-up, instead they need to focus on dealing with those feelings so that they can properly move on and really heal. Since the INFJ has a tendency to neglect their feelings they do sometimes find it hard to let go.

How Do You Talk to an INFJ?

How to Care for an INFJ

Surprise us. INFJs are known to be organized and enjoy having a plan, but there’s a part of us that enjoys spontaneity as well. …
Feed us. I mean this both figuratively and literally. …
Check in on us. …
Give us some space. …
Spend quality time with us. …
Write it down. …
Make us laugh. …
Listen to us.

How do you know if your INFJ is in love?

What It’s Like When an INFJ Finds Love

We’ll be fiercely loyal and protective of our relationship. …
We’ll be your biggest fan. …
We’ll open up to you — but at our own pace. …
We’ll think about you. …
Our actions say more than our words. …
Even though we love you, we still need space. …
We will never forget you.

How do you marry an INFJ?

Although two well-developed individuals of any type can enjoy a healthy relationship, INFJ’s natural partner is the ENTP, or the ENFP. INFJ’s dominant function of Introverted Intuition is best matched with a personality type that is dominated by Extraverted Intuition.

How to Earn an INFJ’s Trust

Why INFJs Leave Relationships and How to Get Them Back — Questions and Tisane

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Distance vs Door Slam

If you don’t know what you did wrong ask

Once you know what you did wrong apologize for it

Ask if you can start a new relationship

Prepare to go slow

Be authentic

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Why INFJs Leave Relationships and How to Get Them Back — Questions and Tisane

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Connection Surpasses Introversion or Extroversion

Here are 4 steps to deep connection in INFJ relationships

1 Make the time

2 Unconditional attention

3 Three magical sentences

4 Be vulnerable

Get The FREE INFJ Relationship Guide

Over to you

INFJ Relationships: 4 Steps To Deep Connection - Introvert Spring — INFJ Relationships: 4 Steps To Deep Connection – Introvert Spring

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Why INFJs Leave Relationships and How to Get Them Back — Questions and Tisane

There’s really only one reason INFJs leave relationships—their needs aren’t being met. INFJs give a lot to the people they care about and ask for very little in return. So, when even the little they ask for is not being granted, they’re prone to walking out.

Distance vs. Door Slam

When INFJs leave, it can take many forms. It could mean they distance themselves from a friend who adds no value to their life or no longer adds value. This friend may not have done anything wrong, but still, the INFJ feels they’re better off going their separate ways.

Maybe this person too easily drains the INFJ’s already limited energy supply. Maybe the INFJ realized they don’t have anything in common anymore or their lives are being pulled in different directions. For whatever reason, the INFJ feels it’s easier not to have this person in their life.

Leaving could also look like door-slamming that friend or someone who, in the INFJ’s eyes, has done irreparable damage. In this case, the INFJ has been deeply wounded for an extended period of time.

The INFJ will have made significant efforts to repair the relationship, but to no avail. Now they feel they have no other choice. They have to cut this person off entirely. If you suddenly find that an INFJ is avoiding you or ignoring your messages or calls, it’s most likely because they have door-slammed you.

(If you haven’t already heard of the infamous INFJ door slam, check out this article.)

The difficulty in getting back into the good graces of an INFJ who left will depend on whether they have just distanced themselves from you or door-slammed you. Either way, this will be no easy task and there’s no guarantee of success.

But if you’re determined to try, the following five tips might help. (The above-mentioned article also offers useful advice.)

5 Tips For Getting Back an INFJ Who Left

If you don’t know what you did wrong, ask. We INFJs are not always vocal about our needs. Since we pay so much attention to others’ needs, we often expect everyone else will do the same. Sadly, that’s not the case. But now is not the time to bring any of that up.

Whatever role your INFJ might have played in your falling-out isn’t relevant for your aim here. If you want to get back in their good graces, you need to know what they perceive as your offense(s). So, ask them what you did wrong. And really listen to what they say. Don’t get defensive. Don’t make excuses. Just listen.

If your INFJ can’t say what it was specifically, ask them to think it over and get back to you. And when they do, again, just listen.

If your INFJ didn’t officially door slam you, they might say something like, they just felt you were drifting apart or they felt that your values were no longer aligned with theirs. In that case, there’s not really a wrong you have to right. You just have to decide whether you’re willing to change what led to the separation. Once you know what you did wrong, apologize for it. Now is the time for the sincerest apology you’ve ever made. Don’t use any flowery language or fancy words here. Don’t quote any movies or poetry or even your INFJ’s favorite book. Just be honest. Speak from your heart. And speak as simply as you can.

Acknowledge what you did wrong and how this hurt your INFJ. And then apologize sincerely for your actions. Acknowledge that their needs are important and say you’re sorry you overlooked them. Make sure the words “I’m sorry” come out of your mouth at least once.

Also, don’t make any empty promises. If you really are going to make an effort to change, tell them that. But don’t promise to do better with no intention of changing anything. It’s likely broken promises are one of the reasons your INFJ left in the first place. Ask if you can start a new relationship. No excessive begging or pleading for this one. Simply ask if you can start something new. Your old relationship is unsalvageable—there’s no resuming it or going back to it. The best you can hope for is to start with a blank slate. Ask if your INFJ is up for that.

Depending on how your INFJ feels about your apology, they may say yes or no right away or they may say they need time to think about it. Respect whatever they say.

If they say no, don’t push them. They’ve made their decision. They’ve decided too much has changed or too much damage has been done for them to come back. It’s possible that if you give them time, they may come back on their own, but don’t count on that. It’s best to move on at this point.

If they say yes, start off by taking things slow. More on that in #4.

If they say they need time to think things through, give them time. Don’t pressure them to make a decision right away. You can check in with them if they take longer than a week to make their decision, but make sure they know there’s no pressure to answer quickly. And when they do finally respond, again, respect their decision. Prepare to go slow. If your INFJ has agreed to start over, know that, in their eyes, you’re on probation. They will most likely not put down all their walls right away. What you have done to get to this point is plant seeds. Only time will tell if they’ll grow or not.

Most likely, even before your INFJ left, you had apologized for certain things you did, only to do them again. As a result, your INFJ is going to have trouble trusting you for a while. Give them the time and space they need to trust you again.

They’re not looking for you to be perfect. They just want to see that you were sincere when you said you would try to do better.

They want to see that you won’t ignore their needs or deny them the attention you promised you would give. Above all, they want to see that you’re being true to your word. Be authentic. Inauthenticity is on the top of the list of things we INFJs despise. So, in your efforts to prove your willingness to change, don’t do anything out-of-character.

Don’t bring your INFJ flowers or a gift every day if that’s not your thing. Don’t be overly attentive to them or give them compliments every five minutes.

Communicate openly and be willing to listen, but don’t go overboard. Your INFJ doesn’t need you to ask them about every thought they have throughout the day. They just want you to listen when they do have something to say.

Anything that isn’t you or that you don’t intend to continue long-term should be avoided. Your INFJ is trying to see if they can trust you again, so don’t do anything that might cause them to doubt your motives.

Again, these tips are not guaranteed to work. If, for example, you severely wounded an INFJ and, as a result, they’ve decided your presence in their life is toxic, it’s very unlikely they will ever open that door again.

But if the offenses weren’t so deep or if your INFJ recognizes their role in the fall out, there might be hope.

Now I turn it to you. How would you suggest someone go about getting back an INFJ who left?

~ Ashley C.

Last updated: June 23, 2022

INFJ Relationships: 4 Steps To Deep Connection

INFJ Relationships: 4 Steps To Deep Connection

INFJ relationships can be tricky. We want deep, soul-shaking connection. But we don’t always know how to get there.

Our personality consists of only 1 percent of the world population. We are rare, and not so easy to understand. Our rarity can be challenging, but it is also our greatest gift. We are unique, therefore we need a unique connection as well.☺

Establishing a lasting connection is a defining moment in our life. INFJ relationships are based on our magnificent ability to connect with our partners.

The blueprint for connection in INFJ relationships is based on understanding. Not many people will be wired the same way we are. When we connect with someone, this truly is a magical moment for INFJs.

Connection Surpasses Introversion or Extroversion

My relationships were mostly directed towards extroverted women. I never asked myself why this is the case. I simply followed my intuition. One relationship in particular stands out.

Six years ago I met someone who I thought was my soulmate. This was the first time I felt true love. What made this so special was the insanely good connection we had. We literally finished each other’s sentences.

Never did I once pay attention to the fact that she is an extrovert. It didn’t matter. All that was important to me was that we understood each other. For the first time I told myself: “I can be vulnerable with this person, and not be afraid.”

The relationship didn’t last, but I will never forget what we had. It didn’t matter that we had different personality types. It was that pure, authentic connection that mattered most. Here is the equation that made the difference:

Connection + Understanding = INFJ Relationships Soar

Deep connection isn’t just about having a good conversation. It’s so much more. It expands into the realm of ideas, understanding and acceptance. As INFJs, we excel in all of these areas.

Here are 4 steps to deep connection in INFJ relationships:

1. Make the time.

Always create the time for the one you cherish. Whether you are single and seeking a relationship, or you are already in one. Remember, there is no such thing as being “too busy”. Even one small message can be a day-changer. ☺

2. Unconditional attention.

Talking, listening – it doesn’t matter – give that person your absolute attention. Shut down all else around you. In today’s world, undivided attention is a priceless gift, and we INFJ’s excel at it!

3. Three magical sentences.

Even the smallest action can have a lasting effect. Use these words to make the one you love feel like the brightest light in the sky:

• “You are beautiful just the way you are“

• “You are not alone, I’m here“

• “No matter what happens, I will not abandon you“

4. Be vulnerable

Vulnerability is the key ingredient for a strong and lasting connection in INFJ relationships. A whole new dimension of possibilities opens up. In that moment, when you feel utterly “naked“ before someone, it will all be worth it (admit it, this made you giggle 😉 ) .

Open yourself to the one you trust and cherish. Trust her/him. Be vulnerable! The greatest strength is not being strong all the time. It comes from absolute vulnerability.

As famous American public speaker, and author Brene Brown said:

“Vulnerability is the birthplace of connection and the path to the feeling of worthiness. If it doesn’t feel vulnerable, the sharing is probably not constructive.“

Many people say that when you meet the right person, you will be nervous, your hands will sweat, you will be confused.

However, in my opinion, when you establish a deep connection with that special someone, you will not feel nervous, anxious, or have the feeling of panic.

You will be calm, and you will be completely aligned with your inner self. Your mind and body will act as one beautiful whole.

If you’ve been lonely for a while, it might be tempting to settle for a mediocre relationship. I can tell you right now, there are more unhappy people in a relationship, than single.

Don’t settle for anything less than you deserve. Only allow yourself to be happy with someone who deserves you!

Get The FREE INFJ Relationship Guide

If you’re interested in connecting with other INFJs from around the world, join Introvert Spring’s private INFJ forum. We are truly a buzzing community! You’ll gain access to unique and 100% private discussions, INFJ blog posts, member events, and videos.

Take a Peek Inside Introvert Spring’s Private INFJ Forum

Over to you

Have you ever experienced the soul-shaking connection every INFJ craves? I’d love to hear your insights and experiences! Please share in the comments below.

Lots of love,

Marko

23 INFJs Explain Exactly How To Win Their Type Over

1. “Approach me like a cat would to an unknown object. Slowly but full of curiousity. Be sincere in your actions, and tell me about your greatest passions.”

2. “I need to be able to trust you. That’s hard to do because trusting people is something that I have a hard time doing. Just be patient and understanding as I open up to you. Be intentional and don’t confuse me with mixed signals. I need closure and assurance of feelings. Spell it out in black and white if you have to. I can be oblivious to romance at times. But once I decide I want you, I am fiercely loyal, and unconditionally loving and accepting.”

3. “Actively listen and engage in conversation. Get excited about little stuff. Be excited with me about little stuff. Write a sweet note or even a small text letting me know you thought of me. It doesn’t have to be romantic, just a reminder that you care. Initiate plans.”

4. “Answer all my questions honestly – and don’t make a move too soon. Let me get comfortable first.”

5. “I usually feel an affinity towards someone right away or not. When it does happen, look me in the eyes, show me you felt it too and just stay.”

6. “Appreciate my knowledge and all of my quirks and differences. I pave my own way instead of following someone else’s path. It can be hard to be in a relationship with someone who goes against the grain most of the time.”

7. “Really listen to what I have to say and get to know me at my core. The more I can tell you are interested in getting to know both the pretty and not-so-pretty sides of me, the more I’ll trust you as a friend.”

8. “Show me that you can be trusted. Help me break out of my shell unsafe scenarios. And listen when I say things. If I say “I need your help,” it’s not flippant. It took everything I had to ask.”

9. “Show up. Be vulnerable. Let me see you. For me, I want to know you. I love you not in spite of your flaws, but because of them. You are only you when you are wholly you, and I want to know wholly you.”

10. “Take the relationship seriously, but help me not take myself too seriously.”

11. “Be emotionally vulnerable, trustworthy, available and willing to initiate contact.”

12. “Talk me out of my shell, and really listen to me. A person who really tries to understand me is someone I would go to war for. It’s rare when someone tries.”

13. “Try not to over think it. Just focus on being friends and not what you would get in return.”

14. “Be your real self around INFJs. We will know when you are, and will immediately want to strengthen the connection that’s between us. But be aware, we will not give you all of ourselves right away. But if you stay you around, we will eventually show you ourselves too.”

15. “Make me laugh and challenge me, even though I’ll pretend to hate it.”

16. “Make me think about things in a way I’ve never thought of before. Keep me guessing as to what you’re going to say next.”

17. “Have a good sense of humor. Be witty and open to having interesting discussions.”

18. “Show me that you really care about me and that you are just trying to get something from me. It’s in the details like remembering I can’t eat certain foods or remembering I’m only free on certain days. Just be thoughtful.”

19. “Be very direct and compliment me on the things you like about me. Honestly is the best policy especially since I can almost always tell when you’re lying.”

20. “To win me over, TALK TO ME. Ask me questions. Seem interested in what I think and feel. I need your attention, I need to feel understood. I also want you to reach out to me, since I’ll never feel confident reaching out to you. I need to take it slow and I need you to understand that I can’t say I love you until I really know you.”

21. “Be independent but able to be there when it counts.”

22. “Be genuine and kind to me. Smile and laugh earnestly. Open up to me. Be honestly interested in my thoughts ideas and stories. Let me be really silly and enjoy it with me.”

23. “Be consistent and steady. It may take a while but once we know you can be trusted we’ll give our all.”

Pick up Heidi’s new book “How You’ll Do Everything Based On Your Personality Type” here.

So you have finished reading the how to win back an infj topic article, if you find this article useful, please share it. Thank you very much. See more: how to reverse infj door slam, will infj come back, when an infj is done with you, infj return, infj cut me off, infj door slam husband, how to approach an infj female, how to understand an infj

Top 50 How To Win Back An Infj The 184 Detailed Answer

How do you reconnect with INFJ?

How do you win an INFJ heart?

How do you say sorry to INFJ?

What should you not say to an INFJ?

What upsets an INFJ?

How do I make my INFJ open?

Will an INFJ make the first move?

How do you tell if an INFJ loves you?

Do INFJs like to be pursued?

How do you tell if an INFJ likes you over text?

Do INFJs fall out of love easily?

Can INFJ forgive?

What hurts INFJ the most?

How do you get an INFJ to like you?

Can you manipulate INFJ?

How do INFJ handle breakups?

How Do You Talk to an INFJ?

How do you know if your INFJ is in love?

How do you marry an INFJ?

Why INFJs Leave Relationships and How to Get Them Back — Questions and Tisane

INFJ Relationships: 4 Steps To Deep Connection – Introvert Spring

23 INFJs Explain Exactly How To Win Their Type Over | Thought Catalog

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7 things you should never say to an INFJ

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23 INFJs Explain Exactly How To Win Their Type Over | Thought Catalog

How to win back an INFJ guy | INFJ Forum

[INFJ] – How to win back an INFJ guy | Typology Central

What is the best way to make my INFJ ex bf miss me/come back after a breakup? – Tiny Buddha

[INFJ] – How to gain back INFJs respect and focus? | Personality Cafe

12 Easy Ways to Love an INFJ Female – wikiHow

10 Ways to Care for the INFJ Personality in Your Life

Why INFJs Leave Relationships and How to Get Them Back — Questions and Tisane

INFJ Relationships: 4 Steps To Deep Connection

23 INFJs Explain Exactly How To Win Their Type Over

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