Dream About Forgiving Someone? The 98 Correct Answer

There’s nothing worse than accidentally bumping into someone in your dreams while you’re happily enjoying your REM cycle and drooling on your pillow. Whether you’ve totally forgotten about the person you kissed at summer camp by the lake or are still embarrassed about that big fight with your high school best friend, having people from your past appear in your dreams can be extremely unsettling .

Read more: What do dreams about cats mean? Here’s what experts say

Your dreams may seem completely random or unfounded (cue: you jump out of a cartoon plane into a pile of spaghetti), but Lauri Loewenberg, a professional dream analyst, says Bustle can allow you to look at your dreams with a metaphorical approach to tap into what your subconscious is trying to convey. Rather than trying to find the literal or logical meaning behind the people or places in your dreams, Loewenberg suggests following your emotions and intuition.

A surprise metaphysical visit from your old college roommate or your mean boss from your old internship appearing out of nowhere might seem like utter nonsense, but Loewenberg says there’s always a deeper reason behind everything in your dreams.

“The subconscious often pulls a specific memory or person etc. from our past when something is happening in our present,” Loewenber tells Bustle. “There was a lesson from back then that we need to apply now.”

According to Loewenber, your subconscious is total packrat. It stores every experience, every thought, every emotion and every encounter – even if you are not consciously aware of it. If you’ve been actively thinking about someone of yours lately, or someone approached them in a conversation, it might be more obvious why they’re appearing in your dreams.

Whether you’ve had that person on your mind for a week or haven’t thought of them in ages, Loewenberg points out the importance of taking a moment to examine both the dream and your feelings .

“Our dreams are very good at warning us when we’re falling into the same old patterns or when we’re getting into the same type of relationship,” says Loewenberg. “[They] speak to us to guide us, advise us, and warn us so we can do it right.”

according to dr Carla Marie Manly, a clinical psychologist and author of Joy from Fear, your dreams can be an invitation to heal a hurt part of yourself or to learn something new about who you are or who you want to be.

“In Jungian psychology, each person in a dream represents an aspect of the dreamer,” says Dr. Manly to Bustle. “The person who ’emerges’ is generally symbolic of some aspect of the dreamer’s self; other people are simply conjured up by the psyche to offer a symbolic representation of a particular issue or problem.”

If you’ve always felt judged by your high school choir teacher or never knew how to talk to your best friend’s older brother, seeing him in a dream can be a reminder to be more confident at your next staff meeting. Maybe you were too nervous to tell your middle school crush how you feel and seeing them in a dream inspires you to ask your cute colleague for a coffee. Or maybe you see a girl you weren’t very nice to in college and you make a mental note to be kinder to your little sister. dr Manly says that seeing people from the past in a dream means there is a lesson to be learned in the present.

Of course, knowing exactly what that lesson is isn’t always easy. When you wake up and scratch your head, totally confused as to why you just dreamed about your ex-boyfriend’s mom or your college newspaper editor, Loewenberg suggests asking yourself the three adjectives that describe personality or essence best describe the person.

“Do any of the three descriptors you selected suit you right now? Or someone you’re dealing with right now? Determine if this is a good thing or a bad thing,” says Loewenberg.

Rev. Connie L. Habash, MA, LMFT and author of Awakening from Anxiety: A Spiritual Guide to Living a More Calm, Confident, and Courageous Life adds pondering what these descriptions or qualities mean to you in the present traits, you look for in people? Are there things you are currently missing? Are they things that you never try to deal with again? If you get lost in your own thoughts, Habash suggests keeping a journal to slow down and really reflect.

Additionally, Loewenberg suggests thinking about what you remember most about the relationship you had with the person from the past and considering whether you currently have similar relationships.

“Sometimes dreams use people from the past as a friendly reminder to tell us, ‘Remember that? Let’s not repeat it,'” says Loewenberg.

Habash goes on to say that it can be helpful to reflect on what that person has meant to you and whether you feel like you have anything unresolved about them. “You’ll know when it’s worth exploring by the intensity of the images and feelings,” says Habash.

While reaching out to her might be your first instinct, Habash suggests taking a moment to really collect your thoughts.

“Before you decide to reach out, take some time to work with the symbolism and explore what that person means to you,” Habash says. “Often they represent something to you that has regained meaning in your current life, and you can work with the representation rather than seek it out.”

Sources:

Lauri Loewenberg, a professional dream analyst

dr Carla Marie Manly, clinical psychologist and author of Joy from Fear

Rev. Connie L. Habash, MA, LMFT, and author of Awakening from Anxiety: A Spiritual Guide to Living a More Calm, Confident, and Courageous Life

Dreaming about an ex can evoke a range of emotions. Having a vivid dream about your ex may make you feel sad, surprised, or confused. Some types of dreams can even affect your sleep quality.

Remember that seeing people you know in a dream is quite common. In remembered dreams, people see four signs on average. Who these characters are may vary. You may see strangers or unfamiliar faces, or see people you know. Parents, siblings, loved ones and former partners can all appear in your dreams.

Dreams about former partners are not uncommon. Research shows that the appearance of an ex in dreams depends on your relationship status at the time of the dream. In one study, 35% of people in a relationship dreamed about their current partner or an ex. In contrast, just over 17% of single people dreamed about previous partners.

But if an ex shows up in your dreams, what does it mean? The meaning you take on each dream depends heavily on what dream theory or combination of theories you believe in:

Psychodynamic theory: Sigmund Freud believed that dreams are a gateway to the subconscious. According to Freud, dreams are directly related to daily experiences and reveal meaningful information to the dreamer.

Activation Input Modulation (AIM) Model: In this model, dreams are the brain’s response to high levels of activity during sleep. The brain also provides a virtual reality model to practice interacting in the real world.

: In this model, dreams are the brain’s response to high levels of activity during sleep. The brain also provides a virtual reality model to practice interacting in the real world. Neurocognitive theory: This theory assumes that dreams arise from stored memories. As a result, individuals have unique dreams while processing portions of their memories. Real life locations and people may appear in dreams, but dreams are not necessarily tied to a specific experience.

Regardless of which theory you believe, dreaming about an ex can sometimes be unsettling or worrying. However, dreaming about an ex can have multiple interpretations. There is no single, precise meaning behind these types of dreams.

Unresolved feelings towards your ex

One interpretation of seeing your ex in a dream is that you are not quite over him yet. If you still have feelings for your ex, it is not surprising that they show up in your dreams because dreams can seem to replicate reality. However, your real feelings toward your ex don’t have to be romantic. They may also feel frustration, anger, sadness, or jealousy.

past trauma

A possible reason for dreaming about an ex can be a memory of a past trauma in your relationship. Research shows that stressful emotions and trauma during the waking hours can affect your dreams.

Trauma can also result from the death of a partner or loved one. To dream of a deceased partner can be a tool for coping with grief. A trained therapist can help you explore the meaning of these dreams and help you process your grief and trauma.

Recently saw your ex

Whether you are scrolling through social media or bumping into them at the grocery store, seeing your ex can trigger their appearance in your dreams. An ex showing up in your dreams may simply be part of memory consolidation. Research shows that dreams most commonly involve events one to seven days after the event experience.

Similar relationship problems

Some studies have shown that elements of a relationship can manifest in dreams. For example, if you’ve been cheated on in your relationship, you’re more likely to dream about infidelity than someone who hasn’t. These types of dreams can also appear after a breakup. Dreams of this type can indicate the need for a closure with an ex. They could also reflect concerns you have about infidelity in a new relationship.

In other cases, these types of dreams can represent parallels in your current life. When you question your friends’ honesty, you may have dreams that your ex is cheating on you because the emotions are similar.

Your ex symbolizes something else

A dream about an ex might not be about your former partner at all. Instead, your ex may represent something else in your life. Some researchers suggest that recognizing the emotional state or feelings in the dream is key to interpreting and understanding the meaning of the dream.

If you are wondering what it means to see an ex in your dream, consider how you feel about them and what memories you associate with them. These emotions may be the more important component of the dream than your ex. For example, if your ex brings feelings of stress or frustration, consider what is causing those emotions in your current life. Remember that major life changes, such as pregnancy or trauma, can also affect your dreams.

How to interpret dreams about an ex

If you’re curious about finding meaning in your dreams, consider keeping a dream journal. When you wake up, write down what you remember from your dream. If you regularly see your ex in your dreams, you can see patterns between the different dreams.

Consider writing down the emotions you felt in the dreams and your reactions to those emotions. These feelings can help you get a broader picture of your dream and whether the dream is about your ex or something else. If you want to be more aware that you are dreaming while a dream is occurring, you can explore lucid dreaming. Lucid dreaming can help you gain further insight into your emotions during the dream itself.

You can also talk to a professional therapist about your dream experiences. They may be able to help you further unravel the meaning of your dreams and offer you strategies to move forward.

In an ideal world, bedtime would be a moment of rest and relaxation, but it’s not always that simple. Even if you fall asleep easily, falling asleep usually opens the door to another world — the one inside your head. And while your night vision can sometimes be controlled in cool ways, like through lucid dreaming, it can also quickly become a source of stress when you start worrying about having crazy-alive dreams in waking life.

Especially if your ex keeps popping up in your dreams… Whether your breakup ended amicably or left you unattached and struggling to get over it, your ex is “back” (at least in your mind) and now you can’t Shake the thought of her even when you’re awake. So what does it mean for your real life when your former flame keeps seeming to invade your sleep? Surprisingly, experts say this isn’t necessarily a sign that you have unresolved issues and/or want to get back together with them. Dreaming about an ex—even one you haven’t seen in years—is normal, and it’s usually about something else entirely. Here psychologists and a dream analyst explain the most common reasons for this.

Your ex is just a symbol.

“Humans have been trying to make sense of their bedtime visions long before recorded history,” says Gary Toub, Ph.D., senior training analyst at the C.G. Jung Institute in Colorado. “The biggest mistake you can make when trying to interpret a dream is to think it’s actually about the person you just dreamed about,” Toub said, because dreams are symbolic. Instead, he says, focus on the hidden content of your dream. “Your subconscious or your dream chooses the best possible representation for something it is trying to symbolize. So if the content is about your ex, you need to look at how that ex symbolizes something in you.”

The dream is actually about you… not your ex.

Think of the people in your dreams as vessels for your emotions. “You are the one who created your dream. It’s like a work of art of your emotions and represents all parts of you,” says Marion Frank, a psychologist specializing in dream analysis and relationships in the Philadelphia area. “Dreams help us process emotions by encoding and constructing memories of them. What we see and experience in our dreams may not always be real, but the emotions associated with those experiences are,” says Frank.

Research from the UC Berkeley Sleep and Neuroimaging Laboratory uncovered evidence linking emotions and dreams. The study found that a reduction in REM sleep led to a decreased ability to understand complex emotions in daily life. If you’re dreaming about your former love, even if she was an abusive ex, ask yourself, “What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you think of her?” says Toub.

What we see and experience in our dreams may not always be real, but the emotions associated with those experiences are.

“While it may be negative, it’s often those qualities and what they symbolize that point to things about yourself,” he says. For example, maybe you just had a nasty argument with your current significant other — maybe you’ve been misbehaving and the argument you had brings out a side of you that you think is related to how your ex did you treated earlier.

Okay, so let’s say you had a fight with your spouse and then dreamed about sleeping with your ex…

The anger you felt toward your spouse before you went to bed seeps into your subconscious. “Your ex may have been an angry person, but in your dream you have a positive, intimate moment with that person you actually loathe in your conscious world,” Toub suggests.

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The ex probably represents anger, and it’s more likely to be the angry side of you. Toub explains that dreams are about what just happened that day. “All the experiences of the day marinate in your head. The dream is the commentary of what happened until you fell asleep.” Your dream is pointing you to something about yourself.

However, if you have recurring sex dreams about your ex, there is more to discover.

Don’t panic and take it as a sign that you belong with your ex (you broke up for a reason!). “You need to cast a wider net in your life – the sex you’re having with your ex in your dream might not mean your current sex life isn’t great or that you don’t desire the person you’re in. if you’re a couple,” Frank says. Maybe you just need more intimate connections from your family or friends.

“The repetitive nature of your dream is that your psyche is giving you messages on a different level. Your subconscious is telling you that you don’t fully understand the memo in your conscious life, so consider analyzing the symbols you see in your dream,” she explains. Your dream is like a fax machine that gives you notes about things find out when you’re awake.”Dreams are a form of healing,” adds Frank.

What if your ex cheated on you but you dream that you are both happy?

Your ex cheated on you. Yet here you wake up at 3am, confused because you’ve been walking hand in hand with them on a sunny beach. “So many metaphors happen in a dream, it’s not about one thing, it’s just about the ex,” explains Frank. She says you have to work with the dream to see the layers. For example, where is the place in the dream (the beach), what is the emotion (bliss) and what did you feel first when you woke up (closure?).

Your dream is pointing you to something about yourself.

If you don’t live near a beach and have always associated negative feelings with that person, your dream may be telling you that you are entering a transformational phase in your life. “What do you like about the state of mind you’re in in this dream state, and then try to apply that to your daily life,” she adds. It could mean you’re ready for a change: a new job or the next step with the person you’re dating. The dream may not even be about the betrayal you associate with your ex, but rather the ability to move on and come to terms with your past.

Is it true that when you dream about someone, they dream about you?

no As cute as that sounds, we don’t become mediumistic in our sleep. But Layne Dalfen, dream analyst and series writer, believes people can share an extrasensory connection with someone they’ve been with for a long time. “Although this is not my way of looking at dream analysis, after 48 years of doing it I know without question that we are capable of ESP and we talk to each other all the time – sometimes with words and sometimes with thoughts.”

For example, says Dalfen, she and her husband have been married for 32 years, and she says it’s not uncommon for them to have a similar idea at the same time. “Let’s say I’m lying in bed in the morning and I’m like, ‘Man, I’d like to go to the movies tonight.’ And he comes out of the shower and says to me, ‘Do you want to go? see a movie tonight?’” This, she points out, often happens in synchronous couples.

“You might have similar images in your dreams, but that wouldn’t be a psychic thing to me,” adds Dalfen. After all, there is no reason to assume that they dream about you too. And they certainly wouldn’t have the same dream as you at the same time, like a romantic take on a Nightmare on Elm Street movie. “I’m not buying it,” says Dalfen.

In short, we dream of what worries us most.

This may not explain why you dreamed of eating a plate of stuffed mushrooms when the thought of mushrooms makes you nauseous. However, experts say that you are more likely to dream about an ex than your current partner. “A person from your past life represents something about you in a way that your current partner can’t,” says Frank.

Most people wake up from a dream about their former lover and immediately assume that they must miss that person. Frank explains that what you probably don’t miss is your ex, but an aspect of who you were when you were with him that you long for. Perhaps there is something in your current life that you are unhappy with, or something is weighing you down and you miss the carefree, happy way you lived years ago.

You probably don’t miss your ex. You miss an aspect of who you were when you were with them.

Extrapolate the sentiment of how you felt and lived your life and leave the people involved out of the equation. But how can we tell if we’re really missing the person we’ve been dating in our waking hours? Toub says we can never really know for sure if dreaming of an ex years later is about the actual outside person or symbolizes a part of us. “Dreams are all so personal. I would say that it’s up to the dreamer to decide – to feel for themselves.” If the dreamer decides to move on with the outside person (the ex in this case) and it doesn’t work out then that tells the dreamer that there was really something more subjective about him.

Consider keeping a dream journal to help stop the recurring dreams.

“A dream is the conversation you have with yourself about a very specific current problem that you are trying to solve,” says Dalfen. “Your subconscious gets the solution to what you want to do in a situation before your conscious gets it.”

Because the people and events in our dreams are symbols handpicked by our subconscious, you can learn something by writing down what happened, how it made you feel, and what memories and feelings you associate with the things you dreamed about . Over time, a clearer picture of what to think about through your dreams can form. “The price you get for remembering your dreams and journaling them is that you can advance your problem-solving skills,” says Dalfen.

And if you want to banish that ex from your dream life forever, try this simple trick.

“The way to stop dreaming about your ex, believe it or not, is to ask yourself to stop,” advises Dalfen. “When you fall asleep, or even during the day, just say, ‘You know what? I have enough. I don’t want to dream about them anymore!’ And you probably won’t.”

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Jenna Autuori Dedic Jenna Autuori Dedic is a freelance writer specializing in fitness, health and parenting stories. She is working on a children’s book and enjoys listening to true crime podcasts while she runs. She just renovated the kitchen in her 100 year old Tudor home in Westchester, NY and can’t wait to get back to cooking for her husband and their two children, Evie and Hunter. Jenna is the former fitness editor at Fitness and Shape magazine.

You are not the only one making the whole global pandemic thing worse, there is a surge in people dreaming about their ex. Fear not: COVID-19 has no plans to get you and your ex back together. And no, “dreaming of an ex” is not a symptom of the disease. Certified dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg says that in general (read: pandemic or not), dreaming about an ex is very (very!) normal. Why exactly has the implementation of physical distancing led to an increase in ex dreams? Below, Loewenberg and three certified therapists answer that very question. Plus what 23 different ex-dreams are trying to tell you — if anything. HEALTHLINE CORONAVIRUS COVERAGE Stay up-to-date on the current COVID-19 outbreak with our live updates. Also visit our coronavirus hub for more information on how to prepare, advice on prevention and treatment, and expert advice.

Why the Pandemic Blamed Your Ex Dreams There are a few reasons why the novel coronavirus has caused your ex to end up in your dreams. You Have More Free Time Whether you were recently laid off (condolences) or are simply bored without the gym or bar to fill your off hours, Loewenberg points out that most people have more free time on their hands. “Lockdown has given a lot of people a lot more time to think about their interpersonal relationships — including their exes,” she says. Basically, the dreams are simply a symptom of staying in the past for a long time. You Slept More Than Usual Many people are also spending more hours napping than they did before the pandemic. “Without a morning alert (or with a later alert), many people may now be entering the final phase of their REM cycle during quarantine,” says Loewenberg. And this stage is associated with deeper sleep and dream memory. So not only do you dream more about your ex, you also remember it more often. Pooh. They Mourn “Right now, we are collectively experiencing the loss of life as we knew it,” says Brooklyn-based psychotherapist Aimee Barr, LCSW. “It’s very common for figures from the past to surface during times of grief.” You’re Lonely Even if you’re not quarantining alone, physical distancing has likely caused you to spend a lot less time with people you care about . “It’s normal for the subconscious to return to a point in your life where you could spend whatever you wanted on people who cared about you at the time and vice versa,” Loewenberg says. They’re Anxious “Due to a heightened sense of anxiety and insecurity in our waking life, many of the dreams people are currently having are nightmares,” says Sula Malina, a therapist in training at the Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center in NYC. “That said, many people have dreams that depict another anxiety-provoking situation (like a breakup or a painful relationship).”

It’s usually related to one of these underlying issues. Every dream about an ex is as unique as that ex themselves, but Loewenberg says it generally boils down to emotional dissatisfaction

sexual dissatisfaction

unresolved feelings about the ex or the breakup

released feelings about the ex or this breakup

Exploring Specific Dream Scenarios These wild times have resulted in a long list of wild dreams, ranging from scary to sweet to violent. Below we go over the most common ones. If It’s a Long-Term Ex “Dreaming of a long-term ex–especially first love–is incredibly common,” says Loewenberg. “This ex becomes a symbol of passion, unbridled desire, unabashed love, etc.” These dreams are your subconscious’s way of telling you that you want more ~spice~ in your life. When it comes to a recent ex, it seems like your subconscious is trying to sabotage all the hard work you put in in your waking hours to get over that person. On the contrary, Loewenberg says, “Your subconscious is actually trying to help you heal and process how you’re feeling about the breakup.” If You’ve Been Abusive To dream of an abusive or toxic ex (think: physical or mental abusive, serial cheaters, etc.) is a very common trauma response, says Malina. According to Loewenberg, if you’re dreaming about an abusive ex, it’s probably because in your waking hours you’re still trying to find a W-H-Y behind what happened. If during waking hours you are “beating yourself up” about that past relationship, the dream could symbolize the abuse you are now subjecting yourself to by rumination. If you miss them or they miss you What qualities did your ex have that you’re missing in your life right now? For example, if your ex was funny, set up a Zoom date with another funny friend. What qualities did your ex bring out in you? Time to use these without your ex’s help! If you want them back or they want you back again, think about the qualities you liked about your ex or the qualities your ex had when you were together that you want back in your life! If someone apologizes to an ex in your dream ≠ your ex is really sorry IRL! Rather, it’s just your brain conjuring up a scene that features exactly what you wish your ex would have said. And if you’re the one apologizing? Chances are you’ve done or said something recently that you regret. The dream = your first attempt at redemption. When someone confronts the other about past mistakes “When you have a dream in which you confront someone, you are confronting the part of you that was hurt by that person,” says Loewenberg. “It’s your way of slowly coming to terms with how you were hurt.” If you’re getting babes back together, it’s time to look deep and consider whether or not you would actually get back with an ex, should they cringe . If you want, it’s time to remember why you broke up in the first place. They were probably damn good reasons! (This is where a therapist or protective BFF can be very helpful). However, if you have ZERO interest in that ex in your waking hours, the dream is a sign that you have made peace with the relationship and learned the lessons you had to learn from it. Exciting! When you fall in love again, says Loewenberg, it indicates that you long to feel cared for and loved now. Pretty damn understandable wish in the middle of a pandemic, right? If you get physical aka kisses, touches and the like. In dreams, sex = connection. So, it’s time to check if you really want to reconnect with that ex. This is another instance where it can be helpful to make a list of the reasons for the breakup. Loewenberg adds, “When you have a child together, it’s not about sex or kissing, it’s about bonding for the good of the child.” Good to know! If you have a child together Don’t take a pregnancy test just yet! In dreams, children represent promise and new growth. Here the dream probably means that your ex will allow you to give birth to a new part of yourself. If you’re struggling “Dreams like this suggest that there is a current conflict in your life,” says Loewenberg. Given that we’re all going through major routine upheavals right now, this is normal. If someone is cheating on the other “If your ex has indeed cheated on you and you have dreams that he is cheating on you, it is a sign that you are bringing distrust into your current relationship,” says Loewenberg. “If you dream that you did it even if you didn’t, then there’s probably something about your current relationship that’s making you feel like the third wheel.” Think: the Xbox, the TV show or the kid. If you break up again Was the breakup recent? Calm down! You are still processing. Was it a while ago? Ask yourself what else in your life is making you feel rejected. Have you recently been made redundant due to COVID-19? Has one of your BFFs started texting or calling a lot less? If they’re in a new relationship Cool, cool, so deal with the fact that your ex will (or is already) moving on. Conclusion: time for you too! Whether they are in danger Depends on whether you are trying to save them or not. If you’re playing the knight in shining armor, there’s probably a lesson you need to take away from the relationship. For example, has your ex brought out your extroverted side? Your subconscious is reminding you to tighten your schmoozing muscle IRL. If you haven’t tried to save her, that is actually a sign that you are letting go of this relationship. boo-bye! If they died, congratulations! This dream indicates that you have let go of the past and you are ready to move on. If they kill you murder = forced end. Ask yourself: During my relationship with my ex, did I lose a part of me that I want to get back? For example your: trust

ability to trust

Confidence If you kill her Sayonara baby! You are probably having this dream because you have killed all the lingering bitter feelings you had towards your ex. However, if you still carry a lot of anger towards your ex, this dream could indicate that you still have a lot of anger and hurt to process.

Exploring Pandemic-Specific Dream Scenarios Usually, the thought of seeing an ex-IRL is a nightmare… So why, now that there’s no chance of seeing him, is he making its way into your coronavirus dreams? Let’s investigate. If you are single and dreaming about them, don’t miss your ex. You miss human interaction! And feel loved! And kisses! Loewenberg recommends thinking (though not for too long) about this ex’s positive qualities. Your subconscious might compile a list of qualities you want to look for in a partner once that *wave around* is over. If you are in a relationship but isolated alone and dreaming about them How did your ex make you feel in your dream? Sexy, adored, groomed or special? Time to plan a digital date night with bae. Your subconscious is telling you that you’re feeling a little neglected right now. If You’re Isolation With a Current Partner and Dreaming About Them Again: How Did Your Ex Make You Feel? If it’s something positive, it’s probably been a minute since your quarantine baby made you feel that way, and you miss that feeling. As Barr says, “Now that people are together 24/7, relationships can feel slightly stale.” She suggests actively planning dates (and tissues) to rekindle the spark. If you dream that you’re developing COVID-19, you still have some ugly feelings towards that ex, says Loewenberg: “Your subconscious uses the virus as a metaphor to show you that you still have something left of your ex, that You need to work through it.” LOL, yes, your ex = the virus. If you’re very over your ex, Loewenberg says, it could indicate that something in one of your current relationships (romantic and/or sexual or not) is feeling unhealthy. Do you become codependent? Do you take each other for granted? Solve after that and the dream will stop.

So… when are these dreams a red flag? According to Barr and Loewenberg: if they become a constant thing (read: nightly or bi-nightly)

when you wake up stressed and find it hard to shake that feeling

when those dreams reflect fantasies you have while awake

What if you’re in a relationship – should you tell your partner? While communication is generally a good thing in relationships, Barr and Loewenberg agree that telling your current boo that your ex-boo is cooling off in your subconscious will do more harm than good. “It’s likely to make your partner insecure and jealous without giving you or him anything,” says Loewenberg. Still, as Jesse Kahn, LCSW-R, CST, the director and sex therapist at The Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center in NYC, says, “There is no ‘should’ when it comes to relationships because every relationship and every person is different. Kahn adds that these questions can help you figure out what’s right for your relationship: Do you want to tell your partner, and if so, what are your intentions and motivations? If you tell your partner, will there be consequences for you or your relationship? How do you feel about these episodes?

How to Talk About It Should you tell your partner the intimate details about these dreams? Probably not. But as Barr points out, our partners are really intuitive. So when you are affected, disturbed or haunted by these dreams, your S.O. probably noticed. Therefore, when your partner asks you what’s going on, Barr suggests sharing the fact that you’ve had some confusing dreams. For example, “I know I’ve been acting great in my head lately. That’s because I had super vivid dreams with scenes from my past, and that disoriented me. But I’m here, I love you, and you don’t have to worry.”

“You’re right, I was in a weird mood. My dreams have been really disturbing lately and they have been haunting my waking hours. I promise to let you know if I’d like to discuss this further.”

How to Address the Underlying Problem While sometimes a dream about an ex indicates an enduring love, resentment, or affection for that ex, this is not always the case! Sometimes it highlights: dissatisfaction in a current relationship

Dissatisfaction with current living conditions

that you moved away from your ex

that you are ready to move on from the ex. Ultimately, your next step depends on what the underlying problem is. Regardless, Barr recommends speaking to a teletherapist. “They can help you figure out why these dreams are happening and develop a concrete plan to help you stop them.”

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Dreaming about someone is just a side effect of our brain’s natural defense mechanism designed to protect us.

You will not see the person you dream about in real life and this prevents your subconscious from focusing on negative emotions.

Essentially, when you dream about them, it makes your brain feel like they are with you, and that makes it more secure.

Want to know more about dreaming about someone and its meaning? Let’s dive in!

Is it a positive sign?

When you dream about someone you like, it means that you subconsciously wish for that person to be present in your life.

This is a good sign if you want him as a friend, partner or companion.

In addition, it means that you think positively about them and want them to be a part of your life in whatever way.

If you dream about a person and you see them in your dream but you cannot communicate with them, it means that you are feeling lonely.

Your subconscious is trying to fill the void in your life by having this person in your dreams.

This could work well because it is a sign that you need this person in your life. You just need to see if it manifests itself in other ways over time.

Another way to dream about someone is a positive sign if you are talking to them in your dream.

If you are arguing with the person you are dreaming about in your sleep, it means that you have been thinking about them recently and it is a sign that they are thinking about you too.

Some people also report that they know exactly what their subconscious is trying to tell them through their dreams, so when this happens look past the obvious interpretation and try to see what else is being said.

What if I dream about someone who doesn’t like me?

Needless to say, it’s uncomfortable to think about, let alone dream about, someone we don’t like.

However, it’s not as bad as you might think.

It is a sign that you want to start something new with this person.

These people often influence your life because of the past or what you thought of it as a couple.

This can tell you things like they will eventually move away, they may come back into your life, and so on.

Dreaming about a certain person is also a sign that you have been thinking about them lately and it is good that this person is thinking about you.

It’s a positive sign if the thought of her crosses your mind when you wake up.

Some people also tend to dream about the same people over and over again, so pay attention to how often this happens.

While it can mean a few different things, dreaming about someone a day after their death shows that they are still with you in spirit.

They are trying to guide you in some way, so it’s either a positive or a negative sign depending on how you interact with them in your dreams.

Does that mean they’re thinking of me?

While dreaming about someone usually means they are thinking about you, dreaming about the same person repeatedly could also mean that they have been thinking about you so much that if you dream about them, it’s just another case where this thought comes to your mind.

If you dream about them often, it could mean that they are thinking about you, but it’s really no different than if you were thinking about them often.

Do shared dreams with someone mean they’re thinking of you?

Yes and no, it depends on the dream.

If you are dreaming about this person but the scenario in your dream is nothing that happened or is not related to any emotional event or situation then he is random in your dream and he is not thinking about you.

If the dream is related to an emotional event or situation that happened between you and the person you are dreaming about, then there is a connection between your thoughts and their thoughts.

Your brain can pour that feeling of theirs into a dream because it’s been in your head lately.

What would a talented consultant say?

The ideas that I share with you in this article will give you a good idea that someone you dream about is thinking of you.

But could you get even more clarity by speaking to a gifted advisor?

Of course you need to find someone you can trust. With so many fake experts out there, it’s important to have a pretty good BS detector.

After going through a messy breakup, I recently tried Psychic Source. They gave me the guidance I needed in life including who to be with.

I was really blown away by how kind, caring and genuinely helpful they were.

Click here to get your own love read.

Not only can a gifted counselor tell you if dreaming about someone means thinking about them, but they can also reveal all of your love possibilities to you.

What if I have bad dreams about someone who annoys me?

A bad dream is a sign that something unresolved is happening with that person in your life.

It’s a sign that you need to work on building better relationships with them or solving a problem with them.

The problem could be that they don’t get along with you, ignore you, or intentionally do something that bothers you.

There are many different reasons why someone might be in your dreams and if the events in your dream are not related to anything emotional then it is just a coincidence.

Sometimes we dream of someone annoying us to protect us from our unconscious anger.

The brain will create that person where they are the problem and you are just a bystander because you don’t want to see that you are the problem.

If this has happened to you and the dreams are extreme in nature, pay attention to what is bothering them about you or causing this problem.

It is also important to note that having a bad dream about someone who is annoying you can also mean that you are training your subconscious to be positive about that person.

Also, if you had a positive interaction with them before or after the dream, then chances are it was just your subconscious preparing you for something good.

What if I dream about cheating on someone?

Cheating on someone in your dreams is a sign that you have doubts in real life.

It’s a sign that you feel disloyal to that person or think they are disloyal.

It can also mean that you have been unfaithful in the past and your brain is reminding you of it.

It could also mean that the person you are dreaming about is emotionally cheating in your relationship and you need to confront them about it.

If this dream happens once then it is probably just a coincidence and should be wiped away.

When it happens multiple times, it’s important to look at the why and how behind it.

To dream of cheating on someone could also mean that you have a dream image of yourself.

The reason for this is that dreams are usually symbolic and based on emotions that you have while you are awake.

What if I dream about my ex?

Dreaming about your ex or someone who is still in your life but not in your current relationship could be a sign that you want something new with that person.

It could also mean that you want to catch up on something that happened in the past or that you want to change something.

Some people also dream about their ex-boyfriends so they can come over and make up with them.

If you are dreaming about your ex, it means that he is still in your life no matter he is in a romantic relationship or not.

It also means that this person is on your mind because of something unresolved between the two of you.

If you are dreaming about your ex, it could be a sign that he thinks about you by default.

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Sometimes when we think of someone while we are dreaming, they appear in our dreams.

It then has nothing to do with thinking about her, it’s just a coincidence.

However, if you keep having a recurring dream about your ex, then you should pay attention.

What if I keep dreaming the same dream?

Having the same dream over and over again is a sign of being stuck or not moving forward in life.

It can also mean that you are afraid of something that might happen in your life.

It could also refer to thinking about something a lot and it will disturb your sleep.

If this happens once or twice, there is no need to worry.

However, if it is happening more often, then it is imperative that you pay attention to the recurring dreams and what they mean for your life.

I have already mentioned how helpful the Psychic Source counselors have been when I have faced difficulties in life.

While we can learn a lot about a situation from articles like this, nothing quite compares to getting a personal reading from a gifted person.

From clarifying the situation to helping you make life-changing decisions, these counselors empower you to make decisions with confidence.

Click here for your personal reading.

What if I can’t remember my dreams?

If you cannot remember your dreams, it means something is wrong in your life.

It could mean that you become so focused on your waking life that you can’t stop remembering your dreams.

It could also mean that something is going on in your life that is preventing you from getting proper sleep.

It’s important to pay attention to the quality of sleep and rest you’re getting.

When you’re exhausted from a stressful life, you need to find new ways to manage stress and sleep.

What if I dream about an ex who died?

If you dream about a deceased ex, it means that there is something unresolved in your relationship.

You probably haven’t processed your death, and the dreams are a way of dealing with the pain your death caused.

Maybe you need to talk about the relationship you had with them and how it ended, or it could be because there is something unresolved from years ago that is affecting your life today.

What if I dream about someone every night?

Have you ever wondered why this happens?

Dreaming about someone every night is a sign that you think about them a lot.

This can be an ex or someone you work with.

If this is a frequent occurrence, it’s important to talk to the person in your dreams and ask them why they keep popping into your mind and what you can do about it.

What if I’ve been dreaming of something specific for a while?

If you’ve been dreaming of something in particular for a long time, then there’s probably something afoot that’s preventing you from getting a good night’s sleep.

Pay attention to your dreams and find out what they are all about.

What if I had my first dream, but the next time I dream would it be like a sequel?

First dreams are usually the easiest to remember because they are the first dream we have and they are usually quite emotional or important.

However, the dreams you have afterward could be just as important and that is why it is important that you write them down in your journal or keep a dream journal.

All you have to do is keep it next to your bed so you can write in it first thing in the morning when you wake up and then you will have all your dreams in one place.

It’s also important that you write down your dreams throughout the day and not just at night before you go to sleep.

That way, as you read, you’re sure to get a clear picture of the potential meaning and how to apply the message to your life.

What are some red flags to look out for?

If you notice any of these signs in your dreams, it means that something is going on in your life that you should deal with.

It can mean that something positive is happening in your life, but it can also mean that there is also something negative.

If you have too many dreams, it means your mind is overloaded or something deep within is working.

It could mean that someone is trying to reach you with energy vibrations so that you remember them or their message.

Find out the message the universe wants you to know, or someone you’ve already crossed paths with.

For example, if you’re dreaming about the person you’ve been in love with for years and never managed to tell them how you feel, then that could be a sign that they’re thinking about you too and want to reconnect .

If this person is an ex, then it could be unresolved feelings between the two of you.

If you are dreaming about someone you still interact with but are not in a romantic relationship, it could mean that you are redefining your relationship soon.

Maybe there’s something you need to tell them or something they need to tell you.

You can tell if it’s a positive dream by how you feel in the morning.

If your mind is clear and refreshed, then this is a sign that the message was positive and everything is clear on your part.

You see many dead people or animals in your dreams

This could be a sign that you are very sad and need to talk to someone about your feelings.

It is also possible that you dreamed about these dead people because they recently died in real life or they reminded you of something.

Sometimes when we are dreaming we are subconsciously looking into the future and the direction we should take in life.

This can be good or bad, but it’s important to pay attention to each one and see if those mesmerizing dreams continue.

If you see animals in your dreams, it could be a sign that something is going on in your life that is making you feel lonely.

It could also mean that people want to scare you.

What if some characters or people are unknown in my dreams?

If you see characters or people in your dreams that you don’t know; It could mean that you are trying to find answers from the subconscious and you are getting closer to the solution.

It could also mean that something is bothering you and you need to work on figuring out who these characters are or what they represent.

Keep thinking about this problem in your life and how to deal with it, or think about the mystery that is bothering you that you soon need to address and solve.

Final Thoughts

The bottom line is that dreams are the treasure trove that can help us discover something new about ourselves and our future.

Each dream you have can tell you something different, so think of it as a puzzle and put those pieces together carefully!

We can’t always know why some dreams come to our minds, but they never come without a good reason.

If you start dreaming about a person who means a lot to you, it may be because you are connected at the subconscious level and that person can guide you through the emotional rollercoaster called life.

Dreaming is a gift and you should enjoy every moment of it.

Hopefully you understand when someone is actually thinking about you while you are dreaming about them. But if you want a fully personal explanation of this situation and where it is taking you going forward, I recommend you speak to the folks at Psychic Source.

I mentioned her earlier. When I got a reading from them I was blown away by how kind and genuinely helpful they were.

Not only can they give you more direction for your dreams, but they can also advise you on what’s really in store for your future.

Click here for your personal reading.

If you’re dreaming about someone you’re not friends with or haven’t seen in a long time, chances are you’ll wake up confused. Dreaming about someone from your past can make you wonder if you should reconnect with that person or what it even means when they invade your nightly thoughts. But in reality, a dream about someone you no longer speak to isn’t really about the ghosts of your past – it has more to do with yourself.

Read more: What do dreams about cats mean? Here’s what experts say

It’s actually common to dream about people who are in your life right now. Theresa Cheung, the author of The Dream Dictionary From A To Z, previously wrote for Bustle, “Friends usually play an important role in your life, so they will naturally meet you and you will meet them again and again in your dreams.” If you appearing in other people’s dreams, it feels good to know they are thinking of you.According to Jungian dream interpretation, the people who appear in dreams reflect your inner workings and aspects of your own personality.

It can be distressing when the ghost of someone you no longer speak to reappears in a dream for many reasons, especially if you have stopped speaking for painful reasons. Having occasional dreams about people from your past that you haven’t seen or even thought about in a long time can cause you to spiral into rethinking. “Notice about dreams that everything and everyone in your dream represents a part of you or something that affects you directly,” professional dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells Bustle. “Besides, if you dream about a person you haven’t seen in ages, or someone you don’t interact with on a daily basis, or someone who doesn’t even really exist, they become a part of you represent personality.”

Dreaming about other people can be a way for you to better understand yourself and your behavior. If there is something that needs to be worked through and addressed in your waking life, it may show up in your dream in some way. Often it will show up in the form of a person in your past or present, even if you are no longer friends. Before you jump to conclusions, here’s what dream experts have to say.

What it means when you dream about someone you no longer speak to

Many people will dream of old friends and classmates from elementary school days. It can be a little strange, especially if you haven’t seen or heard from a certain person in years. Does that mean you should hurry to get in touch with them again? According to Cheung, no. “Their appearance in your dream scene is a metaphor for a neglected or forgotten aspect of yourself that you would like to reconnect with or benefit from reconnecting with,” she wrote. Think about the person you once knew and the qualities they have that stand out to you the most. According to Loewenberg, that outstanding quality or flaw is a trait that you can have or want.

“There was a time when I would have daydreams about this third-grade boy named Jeff,” says Loewenberg. “I don’t remember his last name, but I do remember that he was the shyest person I’ve ever known. I realized that when I wasn’t talking about something in real life, he appeared in my dreams… on something I had to do. My subconscious said to me, ‘Well, you might as well just be Jeff.'” Maybe there are qualities in that person that you either wish you had more or less of in your life. To recognize that within yourself , is the first step when you wake up — not reaching for Facebook to see what they’re up to.

It doesn’t matter how the person is now. They appear in your dream so that you can pay attention to something important that needs to be addressed in your life at the moment. Studies show that your dream consciousness is very similar to your waking consciousness. So if you are dreaming about someone you no longer speak to, it indicates daily emotions that you are currently feeling (and may need to process). In some cases, there may still be something unresolved with the person who is no longer in your life, or with yourself that you need to deal with.

You should also pay attention to how people from your past are behaving in your dream. For example, are they helping you or are they angry? According to Loewenberg, how you behave in dreams is directly related to how part of you is behaving in real life. “They show you this behavior from a different perspective so you can understand yourself better,” she says. Analyzing the dream and turning it into your own life is a method to get to the root of what has been bothering you lately.

People will appear in your dreams randomly for all sorts of reasons. If you’re interested in astrology, Joy Strong, a transformational life coach and professional dream analyst, tells Bustle that planetary declines can stimulate unconscious thoughts from the past to resurface.

“It’s important to remember that just because someone pops up in your consciousness doesn’t dictate whether or not they should have a current role in your life,” says Strong. This is important if you’re dreaming about an ex you haven’t thought about for a while and are wondering if you should reach out. If you stop speaking to that person, there is probably a very good reason, and remembering it is key to inner peace.

Dreams say more about you than the people in them. So if you are dreaming about someone from your past or present, think about what they might represent in your own life. If they appear in your dream, there is something to pay attention to.

Additional reporting by Marianne Eloise

Referenced Studies:

Franklin, MS (2005). The Role of Dreams in the Evolution of the Human Mind, Sage Journals, https://doi.org/10.1177/147470490500300106.

Nir Y (2010) Dreaming and the brain: from phenomenology to neurophysiology, Trends Cogn Sci., https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2814941/.

Questioned sources:

Lauri Loewenberg, dream expert, author of Dream on It, Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life

Joy Strong, Transformational Life Coach and Professional Dream Analyst

What it really means when you dream about someone

Although we dream two to five times a night, we rarely remember our dreams. According to Matthew Walker, a neuroscientist and author of Why We Sleep: Unlocking the Power of Sleep and Dreams, people have their “most vivid, hallucinogenic, narrative, memory-filled dreams” during the REM sleep phase. However, we don’t always remember them because we might not wake up at the right time, Walker told Business Insider. Still, most of us remember at least a few dreams — and some of them can be downright confusing. This is especially true when we are dreaming about someone other than ourselves.

Since the days of Aristotle, experts have wondered about the meaning of dreams. But it’s not exactly hard science. “Like the wondrous variety of dreams, there is variety in thinking about dreams,” wrote Meir H. Kryger, a physician and professor at the Yale School of Medicine, in an article for Psychology Today. “There may not be a right answer.” Still, today’s leading experts have given their best guesses as to the meaning behind certain dreams. Here’s what they think your subconscious is trying to tell you when you’re dreaming about someone else.

For most people, sleep is best, in part because it gives us a chance to relax and dream. But sometimes these dreams can be the source of great stress, especially if you are dreaming about someone you would rather forget. One minute you’re daydreaming about eating the best ice cream you’ve ever eaten, and then suddenly… your ex is there? What does it mean when you dream about your ex? It’s not always a sign that you subconsciously want to get back together.

Of course, it’s only natural to wonder about the reasons behind your dreams, and your curiosity is likely to double when someone unexpected shows up. But even if you’re happy in a new relationship (or feel like you’re super super about that old boyfriend or girlfriend in your waking hours), it’s not so strange if you see an ex or two in your dreams .

Dreaming about an ex is actually very common — and it may not mean what you think it does. If you’ve ever wondered why your brain keeps addressing a certain person when you’re asleep, one (or more) of these reasons could explain it.

1. You have unresolved feelings towards your ex.

Before you freak out too much about it, remember that these feelings don’t necessarily have to be romantic. According to relationship expert Terri Orbuch, who spoke to Women’s Health, dreaming about an ex could mean you’re looking for closure. Maybe you’re unsettled about how things ended between the two of you, or maybe you’re still trying to get over the end of your relationship in your mind.

2. You worry about being successful in a new relationship.

As Ally Mead — a psychic who has studied dream analysis — told the Huffington Post, there’s a good chance that if you dream about your ex when you start a new relationship with someone else, you’re likely to compare the two for effort to make sure it works this time. “When you start a relationship with someone new, your psyche may still be trying to sort out the pros and cons of your old relationship,” Mead said. “In this situation, your psyche is trying to ensure the success of your new relationship.”

3. It’s a symbol of a bigger problem.

“Most of the time, however, dreams are symbolic rather than literal,” Mead said. “Your feelings are probably best focused on healing everything that made you an ex in the first place.”

So when you dream about your ex, think about why your relationship ended and what you could have done differently. If it was your fault — and even if it wasn’t — sorting it out and preventing it from happening in future relationships could end those dreams.

4. You’re actually not over it.

While there are many reasons why you dream about your ex other than still having feelings for him or her, this is still an option. Maybe you need to take a deep look inside yourself and figure out if you really wish you could get back together… and then figure out what’s next.

5. It’s not about your ex, it’s about you.

According to Psychics Universe, there is a possibility that an ex in a dream represents a part of you. Maybe it means that you gave up too much of yourself and what you love in your past relationship and it’s time to get that back. Or maybe it means that you are neglecting yourself in some way. Either way, it doesn’t hurt to analyze your own behavior during the time you were with your ex and see if you need to make any major changes.

6. You are afraid that someone else will hurt you again.

Many people find it difficult to move on from an old relationship simply because it comes with the fear of being hurt the same way again — especially if your breakup was particularly brutal. It could have something to do with your ex-guest being the main character in your dreams. According to Exemplore, the dream could even be your way to realize that a new relationship is going down the same path. That could mean that you have to do whatever it takes to change the course of the relationship, or that you haven’t had full emotional closure.

7. The ex in your dream is actually you breaking up with yourself.

As you can probably already tell, ex-boyfriends appearing in dreams can symbolize all sorts of things. Exemplore says it might just be your mind’s way of telling you that you’re repressing another side of yourself — probably an opposite side of yourself — and that you need to get in touch with who you really are.

“If you interpret this type of dream as a sign that you should reconnect with your ex, not only will this issue remain unresolved, but it will also complicate the issue,” the website reads. “This dream gives you the message that you need to strengthen the relationship with yourself; do not distract yourself now by putting your energy into external relationships.”

8. You try to forgive them after a bad breakup.

If things didn’t turn out well between the two of you and there was never an opportunity for forgiveness, the dream could represent your brain’s ability to create that opportunity for you. According to Dreamstop, it could represent the fact that you need to make peace with your ex. Do you want the dreams to stop? Forgive your ex while you’re awake and conscious, and this might do the trick.

9. You miss parts of your life with them.

According to Dreammoods Dream Dictionary, seeing your ex in a dream could mean that you’re missing something in your old life with that person – and you want it back. However, that missing piece isn’t necessarily the person; It could be the place you lived, something you did together, or a place you visited a lot during that time in your life.

10. Something in your life makes you unhappy.

Dreammoods also adds that having an ex in your dream could be a symbol of something else in your life that is making you unhappy, something else that you need to “break” from in order to fully move on. If you know a fact is dragging you down, it may be a good idea to take steps to change it

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There’s no question that dreaming about someone you haven’t seen in a while can feel like déjà vu.

But what if it’s a sign that they’re coming back into your life or want some form of contact?

Still, it can be a little unsettling when people from your past appear in your dreams with no real explanation.

In fact, if it keeps coming up, then there are deeper meanings and interpretations to what it means to you.

Here are the top 10 reasons why you dream about someone you haven’t seen in years.

1) They want a closure and have not yet accepted their absence

It’s hard to accept that someone is no longer in your life physically, and it doesn’t always get easier with time, so sometimes your brain gives you weird dreams to help you accept that they’re not coming back.

If they don’t come back, it’s like saying goodbye so you can move on in life and make your own decisions.

It is a sign that you are ready to end the relationship and that it is time for her to leave.

These dreams help you either process your feelings or accept the fact that they will no longer be in your life.

As the saying goes, “Mind is a powerful thing,” and it is used to make sense of anything that is not right or normal.

2) You worry about their well-being.

You may be concerned about the well-being of someone you haven’t seen in a while, either because you’ve heard they’re ill or in trouble.

This could be because the two of you were close in your past, so it’s natural to worry when things have taken a turn for the worse and they haven’t gotten back to you.

Or when someone died, your brain tries to imagine what happened to them and whether or not you should feel bad about their death.

Dreams about people who are sick or dying can be nerve wracking, so your best bet is to try to remember what they look like in your dreams and let go of the dream instead of dealing with the outcome.

3) You owe them a debt that is unpaid

One thing that can keep you connected to someone is debt.

In some cases, you might even feel like a debtor to a person or relationship that went wrong because it took you both so long to pay off your debts.

This could also be the case when you do something for someone in your heart, but they never reciprocate and don’t feel that way anymore.

In this situation, your mind is reminding you to let go and move on.

Sometimes you feel like someone owes you and they don’t, so dealing with those feelings and the fact that they don’t exist can be an important part of letting go.

In fact, just your name and date of birth can reveal a lot about your life and the decisions you should be making.

If you’d like to learn more, click here to get your own free personalized reading.

4) You miss her, but you’re too afraid to reach out to her

Missing someone and dreaming about them are two very different things, but both mean that you are not ready to lose them yet.

It’s safer to stay where you are, or better yet in most cases – avoid going back to where you used to be.

This is especially true if the person in your dreams is not necessarily someone you wish to see again or not be found.

That way you don’t have to deal with your feelings towards them and you can just move into your new life.

Sometimes when you’re missing someone and dreaming of a place where memories were made, your brain is destined to dream of those old places and people that keep you both close.

5) You feel guilty for not calling her back or visiting her sooner

Guilt is another emotion that doesn’t just stop when your relationship with someone is over.

Sometimes you think you did something wrong or didn’t pay enough attention to someone, and this can lead to guilty dreams.

In this case, the dream could be reminding you that it is important for you to keep in touch with them as much as possible so that you don’t feel bad about not being there for them when they need it the most.

Dreams can be a very powerful way to share feelings, seeing someone or something in your dream and acting as a medium for your mind to convey the message it is trying to convey.

6) You worry about that person’s legacy and how they will be remembered

You may also dream of someone who is long gone because you want to make sure they get the recognition they deserve.

You try to cherish the memory of their life and what they did for you and how it affected you.

Just as you want to protect your loved ones and be there for them in times of need, this is another reason why your sanity will bring them back to your dreams.

In this case, you may want to actually write down your dreams or take mental pictures of objects in your dream so that you can record them for later.

Perhaps you will find that they contain more hidden messages than you can imagine at the moment.

7) You’re in a new relationship and you’re hanging by a thread because of the person from your past

This dream may seem silly, but it can be a form of foreboding.

You may be in a new relationship with someone you are still undecided about and that is why you see that person in your dreams.

You’re not sure if they’re right for you, so your brain tries to make it seem like an unsettling and scary situation so you can figure out if they’re right for you or not.

In that case, it’s best to go back and look at the past of the two of you together and really ask yourself how you feel about each other.

If there are still feelings, then maybe this dream is telling you what kind of relationship is coming your way.

I personally tried Psychic Source after a messy breakup. They gave me the guidance I needed in life including who to be with.

I was truly blown away by how kind, caring and knowledgeable they were.

Click here to get your own love read.

8) You feel a sense of urgency that you both need to reconnect

You dream of hanging out with someone from your past or even going on a date, but you don’t know how to go about it and it seems impossible at the moment.

There is a certain level of hesitation that makes you worry about hurting their feelings because they aren’t as fond of you anymore.

If you know that getting that person back into your life will be almost impossible, then it’s best to just let them go and move on.

Think about your new life and make it the best it can be so you don’t have to worry about what happens to the person you have to leave behind.

You can’t force that person to do something they don’t want or make them fall in love with you if they don’t want to.

9) You’re finally over her and want to move on

If you’ve been dreaming about the same person for months, it could be that you’re finally ready to move on from that relationship, friendship, or business deal.

As you start moving forward with your life and creating new memories, your brain will begin to put the old ones to rest. You must let them go as part of your new life.

This is also a sign that you are finally ready to end the old relationship and move on with a happy new life.

It’s hard to let go of someone when you’re still holding on to their memory, but if you see them in your dreams sometimes, give yourself a nod and know it’s time to finally move on.

You can do that!

10) You try to come to terms with her death

You may dream about someone before they died but you are still trying to sort out their death and how it all happened.

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This can be a way for you to emotionally process what happened and grieve if you feel like something bad happened.

Keep in mind that you are grieving or are still finding out the details of what happened.

If you dream about someone who has died, then there are probably some unresolved feelings you have about them or things they said or did that still trouble you.

You may want to work through those thoughts and find a way to come to terms with her death before you can really move on.

The reason your brain gives you these dreams is to try to help you understand and deal with the pain you are struggling with right now.

Let’s try to analyze these reasons a little further

We forget people all the time, especially when they are long gone from our lives.

Everyone forgets someone every day and it’s nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about.

It could also be that you were very busy with other things and didn’t have time to see them, but your mind still has something to say about it.

Sometimes dreams are a way for us to sort out our problems and find new ways of looking at things.

In these cases, the dream could be an important reminder that you need to get back together soon or even take a break from your daily routine so you can spend some much-needed time with your loved ones.

Some dreams are just trying to break a kink in your relationship and make you realize how important it is for you to spend more time with that person (and maybe see them more often).

If you are dreaming about someone from your past, it could also be related to them wanting to apologize for something or maybe they want you to tell them about what happened in your life.

Another reason you might do this is because you feel like you need closure with this person and you are tired of being stuck over what happened in the past.

When you feel that something has gone wrong in your relationship, your brain will give you these dreams to resolve what happened and move forward.

Dreaming about an old lover you haven’t seen in years

It’s normal to dream about people you haven’t seen in years, even if you were once close. It’s usually because your brain is trying to sort things out and fixate your feelings on a specific person in your life.

This allows you to learn more about the person, see what they did, or find out how things went wrong between the two of you.

Sometimes, dreaming about people you used to love dearly can be a way for your brain to let you know that it’s time for you to put things in perspective and learn from your past.

Don’t be afraid of your dreams, no matter how silly they may seem. They try to give you positive feedback about the direction of your life so that you can live it better than before.

We all have dreams about people we haven’t seen in years, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you need to reach out to them or try to bring them back into your life.

Sometimes it’s just easier to let go of the past and look forward to creating a better future for yourself.

Dreaming about lovers from the past can also be a way for you to process some of the old feelings you may have.

You may have unresolved feelings about something or feel like they did something wrong to you and it’s time to move on.

If this is the case, it’s important that you remember who they are and what they did to you so you don’t repeat their mistakes in the future.

Dreaming about a colleague you haven’t seen in years

To dream of a colleague you haven’t seen in years can help your brain deal with the changes in your life and how they are affecting you at work.

For example, if that person has risen in their job and you feel like they left you behind, it can be difficult to come to terms with because it’s something that sets them apart from everyone else.

On the other hand, if you haven’t seen that person because they moved away, then your brain will bring them back into your dreams for you to find out and deal with before you see them again.

For example, if they were in love with you before they left but couldn’t tell you before they moved far away, then the dream could be a way for them to apologize for being too shy to talk to you to say something in real life.

Dreaming about a family member you haven’t seen in years

In most cases, if you haven’t seen someone in a while, it’s because they’ve moved away and you’re too busy to visit them.

However, there are times when dreams about people we are close to can be a way for our brain to let us know that our lives are in need of serious changes.

In many cases, the reason why dreams about family members recur so frequently is because your brain is trying to tell you something about yourself.

In most cases, having a lot of dreams about your family members can be a way for your subconscious to help you deal with some of life’s big problems.

The reason these dreams are so important is because they help you get in touch with your emotions and release what is going on inside.

Dreaming about a deceased friend

Sometimes our dreams can seem so real that we have a hard time distinguishing between what is real and what is not.

If someone has recently passed away and you are still in the grieving process, then it is normal to see them in your dreams.

This can be a way for you to release some of your unresolved feelings and process those things before beginning the healing process.

It’s also a way for your brain to make you feel like they’re still there, even when they’re not.

But I understand that dreaming about someone who has died can be difficult, especially if you were already in a strained emotional state.

If that is the case, I highly recommend watching this free breathwork video created by shaman Rudá Iandê.

Rudá is not another self-confessed life coach. Through shamanism and his own life journey, he has created a modern twist on ancient healing techniques.

After many years of suppressing my emotions, Rudá’s dynamic breath workflow has literally reinvigorated that connection.

And this is what you need:

A spark to reconnect you with your feelings so you can focus on the most important relationship of all – the one you have with yourself.

So if you’re ready to take back control of your mind, body and spirit, if you’re ready to say goodbye to anxiety and stress, read his honest advice below.

Here is a link to the free video again.

Dreams about an old high school classmate

If you were close in high school, or maybe had an emotional connection with them, then it’s normal for your dreams to feel a lot like the real world.

That’s why you dream about things that might seem silly to others, but only you know what it was like to be at school with them.

Dreaming about a classmate can often help your brain overcome your feelings for him or her. This is especially true if the two of you were close and maybe even in love with each other before high school ended.

Graduation dreams usually symbolize how you feel not being able to celebrate that milestone with that person.

This is because your brain patterns and thoughts are stuck in the past and your subconscious is still trying to make sense of the things that happened.

In most cases, dreams about people from the past offer us a way for our subconscious to help us deal with these issues and get out of our way of life.

Final Thoughts

Sometimes dreams are just trying to clear things up in your mind because we are forgetting things or getting distracted by other people’s problems, which confuses us as we move forward with our lives.

Dreams are not always a bad thing and they want to help us organize the problems of our daily life so that we can understand what is really going on in our mind.

If you’re having trouble understanding your dreams or are still unsure about anything in your life, then don’t hesitate to seek professional help so you can start solving the issues that are causing it in the first place.

This can help you get all of your thoughts out of your head and into a space where you can finally work through them and decide what to do about them.

I recommend speaking to the folks at Psychic Source.

Not only can they give you more direction on how to deal with dreams about people you haven’t seen in a while, but they can also give you advice on what’s in store for your future.

Whether you prefer to have your reading over a call or chat, these advisors are the real deal.

Click here for your personal reading.

If you want to get back with your ex, rest assured you have a chance. Nothing is really final when it comes to relationships, and people change their minds all the time. While it may take some time, you can increase the likelihood that you two will get back together by focusing on yourself and improving your feelings for you. We know it can hurt at the moment but know this is getting easier and you still have a very good chance here.

What dreams tell you about an ex

Whether you are single or in a relationship, your old partner from a previous relationship may occasionally appear in your dreams, which may disturb you in your waking life. These dreams often make you wonder, “Why do I keep dreaming about my ex?”

Why did I dream of an ex after a breakup?

Dreaming about your ex can bring on a flood of emotions (both good and bad) that we thought were long gone. Dreams about a recent ex can confuse new relationships or current relationships in your waking hours. It is important not to jump to conclusions as to why the dream of your ex and previous relationship appeared in your current life and online therapy can help. These dreams do not necessarily mean that you want to get back together with an ex in a new relationship. There are many other possible causes as to why we dream about an ex, such as you might unconsciously miss them even as a friend in your waking hours. However, as will be discussed, the interpretation of a dream depends on a variety of factors, and for many people the conclusions one can draw from a dream about an ex has more than one possibility as to what your subconscious giving means to your past . current relationships and life.

Identify the reasons why you keep dreaming about your ex. Talk to a counselor about relationship issues

What your dreams represent

Even if your dreams are about something significant, these fantasies are rarely meant to be literal. Your dreams are usually symbolic. The things that people dream about are usually a mixture of thoughts, events and reflections stored over the past day. The reason may be that you are missing your romantic memories from your past. If your ex possessed a trait that your current partner lacks, it could be a longing for that missing trait that your ex had. Dreaming about your ex a long time ago can sometimes indicate longing for the past when you felt desired by ex people. When we long for our lives from years ago, we may be longing for the happiness or other positive feelings about that time.

You can dream about an ex if you successfully ended the relationship before the relationship with that person ended a long time ago. In this case, dreaming about an ex can mean a time when our life was less responsible, less complicated or more fun before a forced end. As we get older, we take on more responsibility in our adult and new lives. This can sometimes make us miss out on simpler or more carefree times, but as we continue dreaming and idealizing, we forget about negative emotions like anger at a previous partner. If that’s the case, it might be okay to enjoy some nostalgia you dream about, but then bring yourself back to reflecting on the here and now in the waking hours of your current life. Dreams can be a coincidence, not a symbol

If you only occasionally dream about your ex and old partner, you should ask yourself how often you dream about other people like old friends or family members. It could be that you give too much importance to your ex who appears in your dream. If you’re having trouble remembering, consider keeping a dream journal. This way you can write about any dreams you need to see when dream patterns appear.

You want to get back with your ex

As simple as it sounds, dreams about an ex can sometimes mean that you want them back. Even if it’s been a long time since you’ve dated your ex, it can take a while for your unconscious desires to surface in the form of dreams. Maybe you still think about your ex occasionally; However, that doesn’t mean you want your ex back. But the opportunity is worth exploring. It may also be important for you to avoid making large phone calls. Think things through carefully and go slowly to ensure you make the right decision. After all, you broke up for a reason.

You want closure on your mental health

The subconscious is a strange place. In it you have information about things that your consciousness has long forgotten. Even if you think you got a degree from an ex or convinced yourself you don’t need them, sometimes our subconscious can tell us otherwise. This can be an indication that you still have unhealed wounds from your ex. It can be helpful to keep a journal of these dreams and the feelings they brought with them. After all, how you feel in a dream is often more important than the dream itself.

These are some reasons why you dream of many possible explanations from your ex. Dreaming about a past romantic interest and person is a common dream, like pregnancy dreams, and there are endless reasons for it. Dream analysis is complicated and uncertain. These dreams can be a wish-fulfillment dream, represent unresolved feelings about a recent ex, and many other factors. Most dreams have no significant meaning, and a healthy dream is when your brain filters out information so you can move on to real life, strive for sanity, and fully explore a new relationship or future relationships.

Identify the reasons why you keep dreaming about your ex. Talk to a counselor about relationship issues

Can you change this pattern?

Do you often wake up and think, “why am I dreaming about an ex”? It could be that you want your ex back as a person, but there are other options. You can prevent your ex from appearing in your dreams by identifying the reasons why. However, make an effort to address what an ex might represent. Whether it is something missing from your current relationship or something else entirely, take the steps to identify the causes of these dreams about your ex. And it’s always important to remember that while dreams can affect you, they often don’t have anything of great importance.

You’ve probably spent a lot of time acting romantically with an ex, so it’s normal for them to pop up in your head from time to time. For a future episode, keep in mind that this does not necessarily mean bad news and may reflect good news depending on the dream. For example, love represents passion and the dream could mean that you are passionate about a job, hobby or relationship, so your dreams might remind you of old love feelings because of your current passion.

While dreams have different and confused explanations, some dreams may trouble you. An example would be negative feelings towards an abusive ex. If a dream is affecting your ability to lead a fulfilling life, discussing it with a therapist can be a good option. According to most medical associations, dream analysis can be very difficult. There aren’t many official ways to become a certified dream analyst because dreams are so changeable scientifically. A famous dream analyst is Lauri Loewenberg. Many people follow and pay attention to what Loewenberg says about dreams. What Loewenberg proposes is paved over the internet and radio, and Loewenberg is known as a dream quote.

In summary, Loewenberg says, “Your dreams are merely the nightly findings and honest comments of your day’s actions, [sic] behaviors, and attitudes. The best way to have a peaceful and pleasant dream is to manage your problems during the day and work on having a better attitude towards them.” A therapist can be of great help in alleviating your dreams, no matter if it is an ex or something else in your past, present or future life. According to experts like Loewenberg, most work on dreams is done during the day, and a therapist can help with that work.

Get the help you need

Dreams are complicated. They make a person feel things they don’t fully understand. You may fret, “Why do I keep dreaming about my ex?” Sometimes, working through these feelings about your ex with a therapist or counselor can help you gain a better understanding. BetterHelp has a team of trained, licensed therapists ready to help you resolve any issues your dreams about your ex may be uncovering. Read some BetterHelp therapist reviews below from people with similar problems.

Reviews from consultants

“Kelly showed me how to be responsible for my thoughts and how to navigate them in a healthy way. While the knowledge was somewhat there, she has a way of helping me understand what or why I’m going through what I’m going through. I appreciate all the time we’ve spent together so far and look forward to learning how and becoming a healthier version of myself through our sessions.”

“I tried a few advisors and almost gave up until I found Colleen. I love her! It’s easy to talk to her, she really understands me and the best part is that she makes me feel like I’m talking to a friend. She gave me some great tips and I’m already sleeping better most nights.”

Conclusion

There are many reasons you might be dreaming about your ex — or there might be no reason at all. The most important thing is what your ex feels about you. Talking about these feelings with a professional therapist or counselor at BetterHelp can help you heal any ongoing issues you may have with previous relationships or other areas of your life. Take the first step.

Below are some frequently asked questions on this topic:

Does dreaming about your ex mean he misses you?

Why do I keep dreaming about my ex?

How do I stop dreaming about my ex?

What does it mean to dream about someone you no longer speak to?

Is it true that a person thinks of you when you dream about them?

Why am I still dreaming about my ex years later?

Why am I still thinking about my ex every day?

Why do I keep dreaming about the same person from my past?

Why do I always dream of him?

What does it mean to dream about someone repeatedly?

We’ve all been there: you’re fresh out of a relationship, in the middle of a breakup, and despite your best efforts, you just can’t stop thinking about your ex. Maybe they broke your heart or treated you badly, and you wonder why you’re replaying every moment of Splitzville. Or maybe it’s been months or even years since you last spoke to your ex, so the pink memories are repeating themselves.

Whatever the case, you are not alone. Many people find themselves pondering why their “ship went south”—it’s just another part of the breakup process. Your ex was probably the last person you were completely open, honest, and vulnerable with, so it’s understandable that they have a hold on you and your feelings. Still, it’s important to understand exactly why you might feel “obsessed” with your ex or what they’re saying about your emotional state. Keep scrolling for a breakdown of how to get through it and emerge happier, healthier, and, hey, maybe even in a new relationship.

Seriously, why can’t I stop thinking about my ex?

Sorry, no short answer here. There are countless reasons why your past relationship might be on your mind, whether it was sparked by old photos or the passing of a possible anniversary. Or maybe you just started dating again and can’t help but compare each person to your old flame.

“We are creatures of habit, and we don’t just have practical habits (e.g. the route you take to get to the office) and physical habits (e.g. the way you tap your foot or yours hair), but we also have emotional habits,” explains Shadeen Francis, licensed relationship and family therapist and founding expert on the mental health app Mine’d. “There are ways in which we routinely feel, expect to feel, or hope to feel , and our habits or routines are the response patterns we consciously or unconsciously create to help us navigate our world more easily.”

But it’s not until circumstances change that Francis says you actually consider the routines you create. That means it takes a relationship nearing its end or a complete breakup to realize just how deep your emotional habits have gotten. Breaking the emotional habit of thinking about your ex can take a while, especially when “memories of both positive and painful times” surface during the grieving process, she adds.

It’s worth noting that these feelings of grief may not surface immediately, as it often comes as a shock to the system to turn every routine you once knew on its head, even if you saw the breakup coming or were the one initiating it Has. So you might think about your ex the same way you would if you were together…before you remember that you, uh, aren’t.

But thoughts of an ex can persist long after, whether they’re constant or fleeting. “There’s no set amount of time to stop thinking, or more specifically, to stop feeling about an ex,” says Francis. And while some believe it takes half the time you’ve dated someone to get over them, Francis doesn’t like putting such a rigid schedule on it. “This invitation is about learning to make peace with difficult or uncomfortable emotions, practice self-compassion, find support, and allow yourself to pursue opportunities to feel good and stay open,” she says.

So, I’m obsessed, right?

This is a common thought, especially if it’s been a while since your breakup or you’re constantly repeating every aspect of the relationship in your head and can’t figure out why. But Francis urges considering a slight reshaping. “What if your ‘obsession’ is actually hyper-vigilant?” she poses. “We tend to focus on details when we don’t feel confident. Especially when the breakup or the relationship as a whole is painful, we repeat the relationship because part of us is looking for answers.”

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As this thought process unfolds, Francis notes, the same questions usually follow: Why did this happen? Could I have changed something? Did I do all I could? “We want this information because we’re wired to survive and we feel safest when we feel able to protect ourselves,” she explains.

But what does this mean for future relationships?

Since thoughts of an ex can come up at literally anytime (funny!), it’s possible that they’ll pop up after you’ve started dating someone else, or at least started thinking about the possibility of dating. But when you suddenly can’t stop thinking about your ex, you might be wondering if you’ve really done enough for the next relationship. “I think there’s a misconception that we should never think about our past in order to be ready to move into our future,” notes Francis. “But your past relationships are part of your story and inform what you have learned and understood about yourself in the present.”

If you’re ready to start dating, that’s great, and by all means do it. Because, as the old saying goes, “often the best way to get over someone is to get under someone.”

But it’s important to recognize if you’re just looking for a distraction or if you’re actually ready to be vulnerable again. “While it’s wonderful, a new connection alone isn’t enough to heal old wounds, and you’ll still have that work to do,” says Francis. “And if you’re not really present, your past will feel like it’s holding you back.” Whatever your emotional availability, let your current or future partners know so they’re present and aware of your needs what they are ready for.

When is it a problem to think about your ex?

While it’s perfectly normal to think about your ex occasionally, it’s important to pay attention to how those thoughts are affecting your life and emotions, and to know when it’s time to worry. If thinking about your last relationship is starting to interfere with your current relationships—romantic or not—or they’re preventing you from finding a new partner, it can help to think about why that person and your experiences with them are the way they are have a lasting effect.

The thought of an ex can also take a toll on you that shouldn’t be taken lightly. “Think of your thoughts and memories as stories — movies you play in your head to yourself — and ask yourself how the movie ends,” says Francis. “If the thoughts bring you constant distress or anxiety, keep you from participating in your life, make you feel hopeless about the future, or result in behavior that hurts you or others, we know we have a problem.”

If so, she suggests seeking outside help. “Stay connected to loved ones and please reach out to the people who support you if you need them,” advises Francis. “And consider working with a relationship therapist as part of your care team to help you learn new skills, heal past trauma, and create a nonjudgmental space for emotional support.”

Remember, yes, you broke up for a reason.

So you can’t stop thinking about your ex, but can you handle it? Total. For example, it’s common to idealize past relationships — even the bad ones — which is often not an accurate representation of what transpired. Whenever that happens, try to remind yourself that your ex is your ex for a reason. (If listing these reasons helps, get out your pen and paper!)

And while it can feel like things are completely out of your control, it’s important to remember that ultimately they are not. “You have the ability to choose what you put your attention on, but you won’t be ashamed to change,” says Francis. “So try to find some self-compassion as you hold yourself accountable for working to feel better, and remember that you deserve care and support.”

Whether you just got through a breakup or your relationship is on the back burner, thinking about your ex is part of the healing process, like eating ice cream and watching sad movies. Don’t sweat the occasional thought, but think about the role they play in your life. And remember, you—and only you—get it.

Gabby Shacknai Gabby Shacknai is a New York-based journalist and editor who produces high-quality content for a variety of outlets and brands across multiple industries.

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Do you dream of an amazing vacation but with your ex? Of course you shake your head and dismiss that thought as quickly as possible, but what happens when it doesn’t stop there? People often dream of their ex when there is no graduation yet. It is very natural to dream about someone who has been a big part of our lives. However, the situation can get a bit complicated when you are dreaming about your ex with his new girlfriend. Our minds don’t play fair when it comes to imagining things that make you turn your nose up. This dream can be confusing and a bit too dramatic. Here are some reasons why you can dream of such a scenario.