Dream About Ex Best Friend Apologizing? The 117 New Answer

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Lately it seems like I keep dreaming about my ex.

Although I haven’t seen him in ages, he appears in my dreams several nights a week.

I had heard the old saying, “If you dream about someone, it means they miss you.”

Super confused about what was going on, I decided to get to the bottom of things and find out if dreaming about someone really means they are thinking about you.

What I discovered was, yes, dreaming about someone could mean that they miss you or that they are thinking of you.

But our dreams often say far more about us and our own deepest thoughts, feelings, fears, and desires than anyone else’s.

Read on to find out what it really means to dream about a person and how to tell if it’s because they miss you or not.

What does it mean when you dream about a person? Do you miss me? 5 signs to look out for

If only knowing what it means to dream about someone was an easy answer. But the truth is that dreams, by their very nature, can be very confusing.

There are scientific and psychological explanations, as well as more supernatural or spiritual answers. In this article we will look at a few.

To understand if your dream really means that the other person misses you, you need to try to interpret your dream to look for clues.

While the signs I mention below will give you a good idea of ​​what your dreams mean, talking to a real psychic is even better.

The key is to find a psychic you trust.

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If you dream about a person, you should pay attention to these 5 things:

1) Whether a real event is repeated in your dream

Everyone dreams while they sleep (in fact, many animals dream), but the truth is we don’t really know why.

Surprisingly, although there are many theories, there are still no concrete answers.

A fairly simple explanation for why we dream is the activation synthesis theory, which states that dreaming helps us process information from our lives.

Biologically, many circuits in your brain fire when you are in REM sleep (the dream state).

Certain areas of the brain involved in emotions, sensations, and memories are activated.

Our mind is essentially a meaning-making machine.

So if you notice that real life events or situations involving another person have been repeated in your dream, this could be the way your mind is trying to process and understand certain things that happened .

2) If you experience strong emotions during your dream

Sometimes it’s less about the who, what, or where of a dream and more about the feelings and emotions it evokes for you.

Since dreams are often not meant to be literal, it can be helpful to look for other hidden clues in the dream that can help you better understand why that particular person is appearing.

And whether it’s because they miss you, or maybe more because you miss them.

How do you feel about them in the dream?

Do you feel happy or do you remember a time that has now passed? Maybe you long to revive those times or simply to experience such moments of happiness again.

Or maybe you are feeling sad, scared or angry at her in your dream?

If so, you might be wondering if you have any feelings towards them that might resurface.

If this is someone with whom you had a romantic relationship or even a strong friendship that has since ended or drifted apart, it’s natural for us to have lingering emotions that may reappear in our dreams.

Sometimes our dreams are there to reflect and give voice to the things we are feeling.

You may not even be aware of these emotions — in fact, according to Sigmund Freud’s theory of dreams, they often represent what’s going on in our deep subconscious.

It may mean that there are strong feelings or thoughts buried somewhere in you about that particular person.

3) When you notice creepy coincidences that you can’t explain

So far we have looked at more psychological reasons why someone might appear in your dream.

But many people also believe that dreams are a gateway to a higher self and realm. And in many ancient cultures, dreams were considered spiritual guides.

Science can explain a lot, but new discoveries keep pushing the boundaries of what we once thought of as logical.

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Evidence of extrasensory perception (ESP) and connections in ways we don’t fully understand have been examined with some very interesting results.

Have you ever had the experience of thinking about someone and then having them call you right away? And you wouldn’t be alone, as is really common.

Is it coincidence or are you actually absorbing each other’s energy?

Or maybe you thought of someone on purpose and got them to reach out and they do. It’s almost like you telepathically made her miss you.

Well, you might be surprised to discover that a biologist has found something called morphic resonance – telepathic connections between organisms along with the ability to share collective memories.

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That said, it might not be such a far-fetched idea after all that you can communicate with others in your dreams.

So if you keep noticing strange clues or coincidences in your life about this person, maybe that’s a sign from the universe that they’ve been thinking of you.

Maybe you keep seeing memories of that person wherever you go, you meet them unexpectedly, or they text you after you just dreamed about them.

If you would like more clarity on this, I would suggest speaking to a gifted consultant at Psychic Source.

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Instead of trying to decipher your dream yourself, talk to a counselor who will help you put the pieces together.

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4) If their appearance in your dream seems completely random

If someone has been on your waking mind a lot and then appears in your dream that night, it may not seem so strange.

But what does it mean if someone randomly appears in your dream?

If you haven’t given her special thought beforehand, you might be able to psychically sense her feelings for you.

In this case, it might make more sense to assume that the energy is coming from them rather than you – and it’s a sign that they’re missing you, and you can feel it.

At the end of the day, we are all just a collection of vibrant energy coming together in physical forms.

And there’s a lot of energy around us that we can’t see or touch, but we can still feel it in other ways.

How can you tell if it’s them you’re missing or if you’re thinking about them?

If your dream about her didn’t bring up any strong emotions and seemed to come out of the blue, it may seem like it wasn’t your emotions or thoughts that caused the dream.

In this case, you may think that it is more likely that they have thought of you or will appear in your life.

5) When that person could actually represent something else

Because dreams are often ambiguous, sometimes we dream of a thing even though the real meaning is much deeper or something entirely different.

Our fears, desires, old traumas, and past hurts can resurface and begin to play out while we sleep.

According to contemporary dreaming theory, this is anything but random. Instead, the events that unfold are guided by the dreamer’s emotions.

As Professor Ernest Hartmann, director of the Boston Center for Sleep Disorders, explains in Scientific American:

“When there is a well-defined emotion, dreams are often very simple. Thus, people who have experienced trauma often have a dream like: “I was on the beach and was swept away by a tidal wave.” This case is paradigmatic. It is evident that the dreamer is not dreaming about the actual traumatic event, but instead is imagining the emotion, “I’m scared. I’m overwhelmed.” If the emotional state is less clear, or if multiple emotions or concerns are present at the same time, the dream becomes more complicated.”

If you interpret your dream instead of taking it at face value, you can reveal some hidden meanings that you hadn’t considered before.

What does it mean when you dream about someone repeatedly?

You have unresolved issues with them.

So if you are interested in finally moving beyond those dreams, maybe it is time to heal yourself from what happened in the past.

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Is it true that when you dream about someone, they dream about you?

The possibly surprising answer to this question is maybe.

As unlikely as it may sound, there are scientifically proven examples of people who have had the same dream.

The best recorded examples are from professionally trained therapists and their clients who shared the same dream at about the same time.

More anecdotally, many people have experienced dreaming about someone only to find out that their dream included you.

While it’s difficult to say what’s really going on, it at least makes it possible that when you’re dreaming about someone, maybe they’re dreaming about you.

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In fact, there are several reasons why dream sharing might be more plausible than you might think.

What does it mean when you keep dreaming about someone you no longer speak to?

As we have said before there are many reasons why you dream about someone even if they are no longer in your life as many of our dreams come from our subconscious.

It could be a secret desire you still have for her, something you miss about the connection you once had, or something unresolved between you.

If you want to know exactly what it means to dream about someone you no longer see, I also recommend reading this article.

Bottom line: how do you know if dreaming about someone means they miss you?

Hopefully this article has given you some ideas on how to look for signs and dig into your own psyche.

But if you really want to find out if the person you keep dreaming about is missing you, don’t leave it to chance.

Instead, speak to a real, certified psychic who will give you the answers you are looking for.

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Life is always changing. And even if you live in the same house you grew up in, you lose touch with friends and neighbors who have moved away. Thanks to Facebook and social media, you can meet and follow old school friends. But what does it mean when you dream about an old friend you haven’t seen in years? Let’s look at some possible interpretations.

what does it mean to dream about an old friend

1. Longing for childhood

When we were kids, we just wanted to grow up. And the adults around us kept warning us to slow down and enjoy our childhood. Of course we didn’t listen because we were in a hurry to do what we wanted. For us, adulthood means freedom and fun.

But what does it mean when you dream about a childhood friend? It means you long for the innocence of youth. You didn’t see the value in it when you were young, but everything seems easier as an adult back then. Growing up weighs you down and you want out!

2. Lack of certain feelings

Some of us are so blessed that we see our old friends regularly. So when we dream about them, it may be a practical rather than a spiritual dream. But what does it mean when you dream about an old friend you haven’t seen in a while? First, describe your friend in three words.

These are probably the qualities that you subconsciously associate with your boyfriend. So, the dream could mean that you lack these qualities. You want to see more of them in yourself and others around you. Ask your angels what steps you can take to nurture these traits.

3. Overwork and burnout

We addressed the longing for the innocence and pleasure of childhood. But sometimes, dreaming about an old friend sends a more specific message about your work life. What have you been doing with this old friend over the years? You were probably playing, having fun, or just hanging out.

So, to dream about this friend means that you are longing for times when the pressures in life were less. This dream does not necessarily mean that you should call this friend. But it means you’re overwhelmed at work and need to take some time to rest, so ask for a few days off.

4. Grow up!

So far we have looked at two interpretations that tell of childhood nostalgia. But sometimes dreaming about old friends sends the opposite message. Your dream could be a sign from your guides that you are too childish and need to develop a mature attitude.

In the same way that people resent the concept of growing up, our elders want us to stop whining and just grow up. So if you dream about old friends, especially your peers who somehow seem more mature than you, you may have an inner desire to connect.

5. Old patterns are returning

As we go through different stages in our lives, we associate with people who share our worldview. The friends you played patty cake with in daycare and pre-K might not be the same ones you had a crush on in middle school. Or even the ones you rebelled with in high school.

Think about your relationship with the friend in your dream. Were they a good influence or a bad one? This dream is probably warning you about negative peer pressure as an adult. Or to advise you to regain the positive qualities that the old friend represents in your memory.

6. Unfinished business

We lose old friends in different ways. Maybe you moved away as a kid and didn’t have a way to keep in touch, especially if you grew up before email and cell phones. Or maybe you changed your personality, job, or habits and broke up now that you have less in common with them.

Sometimes one of you gets married, has children, or embarks on a busy career and you can no longer connect physically or emotionally. If you are dreaming about that old friend, maybe someone in your life reminded you of a trait they had and you want to end the friendship.

7. Nepotism and Favors

What does it mean when you dream about your childhood best friend, high school, college, summer camp, or even a buddy at a previous job? Assuming you are no longer in contact with this person, the focus of the dream is on group dynamics in your current workplace.

You may subconsciously favor someone, and there may be tension with other people at work. Or maybe you’re trying to suck up to the boss and get a promotion. You can even be a trainer, turning one of your students into a teacher’s pet. All of this creates tension.

8. Blame

Interpersonal relationships are interesting. When we’re upset we only remember the bad things about the person, but when we’re happy they can’t go wrong. When you think of an old friend, you probably focus on the good times. What does it mean to dream about fights?

If you dream about a fight with an old friend, the news is about someone (another) in your waking life. They’re probably fighting about something and assuming it’s all their fault. Your guardian angels are sending you this dream to remind you that you played a part in this mess.

9. Healing Tips

To dream of an old friend can be a sad or a loving moment. But the spiritual interpretation of this dream has nothing to do with that buddy from your past. Instead, think about what you were doing in the dream. Was it homework? Shopping? A sleepover? A celebration? Housework only?

Something in this scenario is relevant to your waking life, so ask your angels to make it clear. Perhaps you and your friend were working on a puzzle in a dream, and the exercise holds the key to solving a puzzle at work. Or maybe you need their calm demeanor in this crisis.

10. Hope and Vision

Maybe you haven’t seen someone for years and they suddenly appear in your dreams. Under these circumstances, you should consider whether the dream is a prophetic vision or a symbolic clue. And if you ask nicely, your heavenly helpers can show you what’s what.

For example, if you dream that an old friend is pregnant, it could be a sign that she is expecting a child, so that is a vision. But it could also be a visual reminder that you will remain friends for life (just like the child growing inside her). So do not rush to congratulate her!

11. Name related meanings

Sometimes you meet someone on the street and they seem vaguely familiar. They are friendly and act like they know you. They even seem excited to see you. So you assume that it is an acquaintance from your childhood and mirror their enthusiasm back to them.

Later you might try to find out who exactly they were! But what if you dream about an old friend and remember his name exactly? Try using a dictionary of names to see if your angels might say something on the subject, e.g. Patience, Purity, Serenity or Beau.

12. Job-Related Messages

A dream about a girlfriend named Lily or Nivea can be a call to let more light into your life as both names mean white. But if you dream about an old friend, try to remember (or ask around and find out) what they do for a living. It can be a current or past occupation.

Your spirit guide could be using your old friend to send you a message related to his profession. To dream of a doctor or nurse could mean that you are ill. Dreaming about a fellow teacher could herald trouble at your child’s school. A backmate could mean a party soon!

13. Role-Related Messages

Some of us have a handful of friends while others have hundreds. But many of us have different friends for different situations. Maybe your stylish friend will take you shopping. Or the buddy with the green thumb who advises you on gardening. Or the party friends for the weekend.

So if you have a dream about an old friend, think about the role he has played in your life. Were they the quiet, wise, smart countryman who held you when you got dumped? I’m sorry, maybe you’ll break up soon! If you dream of college drinking buddies, maybe you will be partying soon!

14. Unacknowledged loneliness

Some say your college friends will be with you for life. Others think your middle school friends are the best because they know your unfiltered, uncurated, teenage self. However, we all have friends from our past that we look back on with affection and longing.

So if you dream about someone like that, you might have a missing element in your current circle of friends. Maybe you want someone you can just sit quietly with. No plans, no agenda, just mutual camaraderie. We rarely get that as adults except through romance.

15. Emotional longing

On the other hand, many of us have had (and have) secret crushes on our friends. So what does it mean when you dream about an old friend you were silently in love with? You know the joke: Question: What do you say when your crush likes you too? Answer: fantasy.

But seriously, to dream of an old crush liking you again means you are feeling love worthy. It is a sign of confidence and self-confidence. Your higher helpers are reminding you how awesome and lovable you are. They tell you it’s time to stop being so down.

16. Social Anxiety

When you wake up from the dream mentioned above, you might be tempted to call and confess to that old crush. (We wouldn’t recommend it, at least not based on a dream!) But what if you dream about that old friend rejecting you? And it’s not necessarily a romantic rejection.

Maybe you got into high school and they picked a new audience and left you out. Or they didn’t invite you to a party. These events probably didn’t happen in your history together, but they feel so real! The dream means that you subconsciously fear rejection from your current companions.

17. Self-Acceptance

Here’s another zinger – what does it mean when you dream about dating, kissing or marrying an old friend? No, that doesn’t mean you have to look them up on Facebook to see if they’re single! Unless, of course, they called out of the blue to tell you they’re available now…

Usually the dream is celebrated by your spirit guides. It means that you now love and accept your whole self, good and bad. And that’s what your soul strives for. The dream means that an old friend’s love sentiment is being sent from your higher self to your lower self. Enjoy it!

18. Repressed Desires

On the other end of the spectrum, what does it mean when you dream about an old friend ignoring you? It’s not a high school friend who doesn’t recognize you because you’ve changed so much. This is someone who saw you, made brief eye contact, and then walked past.

You’re sure they can tell who you are because your relationship was so close. And you didn’t have a fight. This dream can be extremely confusing. But don’t call your buddy and yell. The dream is about you, not them. And it means you hide deep needs from yourself.

19. Social transformation

You may have heard a version of the following complaint: “Not everyone is your friend! Learn to define people as colleagues, acquaintances, or colleagues.” It seems easy, but in social spaces it becomes difficult. You may see them as pals, but they see you as casual!

So what does it mean when you dream about someone touching on your past but suddenly acting like your best friend? Your guardian angels are sending love to you. You are about to make meaningful connections, find true friendships, and expand your network.

20. Deep seated grudges

The human brain is a strange thing. It creates thousands of thoughts every day, but we don’t always know what’s going through our heads. Or in our hearts. So our angels use dreams to bring out some of that darkness. What are they saying if you dream about killing an old pal?

We’re assuming this is someone you really liked (as opposed to an enemy or a tolerated member of your society). The dream implies that you have hidden anger and unacknowledged resentment. Ask your angels to show you where it stings and how to heal the pain.

21. TLC required

As we keep saying, the people, objects or animals you see in your dreams are rarely literal. So if you dream about old friends, they are not the point of the dream. Yes, you can see them, recognize them and even now their names. But the dream is not about her at all.

It’s more about the feelings and memories they evoke. And more often than not, you need the warmth, empathy, fun, and sense of belonging that your friends used to give you. Ask your spirit guides to show you people in your daily love who can offer the same level of support.

When was the last time you dreamed about an old friend? Tell us all about it in the comments!

1. Remove them from your social media.

Every time you come across her name in your newsfeed, your heart sinks deep into your chest. All the raw emotions return with a vengeance and you feel a familiar sickness settle in your stomach. Keeping that person on your social media can and will only hurt you. I recommend locking to hide the temptation to crawl. Whatever is going on in your life should no longer concern you or interest you.

2. Delete their phone number.

Drunk phone calls or texts will be your worst enemy. Save yourself the embarrassment (and dignity) and just remove their number from your phone. You have no reason to contact her when she is sober and you want to keep your drunken feelings away from reality. In the ideal circumstances where they feel the desire to reconnect with you, they will. But in the meantime cut the phone lines immediately.

3. Stay away from passive aggressiveness.

The temptation is great, especially at the beginning of the breakup. BUT RESIST! You’re only going to make yourself look like the bad guy if everyone sees you keep tweeting about this “stupid person who NEVER deserves friendship.” Yes, we know who you mean. And it’s more than likely that the message will get back to them. Not good.

4. Bleed if you must, then release.

It’s never a good thing to bottle up strong emotions, so it’s healthy and natural to share your inner feelings with a small group of trusted people. However, constantly bitching about your ex-boyfriend can make you feel worse instead of better. If the hurt feelings are fresh, talk and scream and scream and cry – get it out of your system! And then clean your slate and leave that person behind. Because talking bad about them only hurts one person: you.

5. Make a positive list of reasons why you are feeling better.

Some people cope better with heartbreak when reminded of the good things that come from a bad situation. By making a list of reasons why things can get better for you and your life in this new future, this can be the little boost you need to move forward in your life and leave the toxic people behind forever .

6. Remember the true friends you still have in your life.

In times of loss and hurt, it’s easy to forget the great things that still surround us. You may have lost a close friend, but think of the people who still have your back, love you, and are ready to help you get back on your feet. A lost friendship doesn’t mean you’ve lost everything. Always remember to count your blessings and appreciate what (or who) you still have in your life.

7. Cheer up.

A broken friendship is a huge ego buster. But make a conscious effort not to lose confidence or fall short of your true potential. Just because one person misses out on the great person you are doesn’t mean every person in your life will do the same. Nurture your battered confidence, but make sure you bounce back twice as fast.

8. Never stoop to their level.

Unfortunately, not all friendships end well. In fact, most never do. Sometimes people use malice or revenge to hurt you and get you to react. These people might spread rumours, try to get people to “take their side” and dislike you, and do everything in their power to keep you angry and hurt. If you feed these people, you will always lose. Their goal is to hurt you and make you look bad, and once you get revenge, they win. So what are you doing? Nothing! Yes, it’s definitely easier said than done, but it will only benefit you positively in the long run. Not only will you be the better, more mature person, but you’ll show people the real you (and not those nasty rumors) – actions speak louder than words!

9. Be kind.

If you live in a small town or go to the same school or maybe even have the same group of friends, there’s a good chance you’ll end up running into this person. Try to resist the urge to stare at them from across the room or let people nearby know what a terrible person he or she is. Now you don’t have to run over and hug her tight like nothing ever happened; You should be true to yourself and your feelings, and you probably don’t agree with what happened. But if they say hello, say hello back. Be polite. Be polite. It doesn’t mean you are wrong and insincere. Being polite is simply a choice of propriety. You are both human, you deserve to be recognized as such.

10. Forgive them.

Wait! Don’t roll my eyes just yet. I know this is another easier said than done tip, and it’s far from easy. But when it comes to truly moving forward from a broken friendship (or anything, for that matter), forgiveness is key. Forgiveness doesn’t mean they’re off the hook for what they’ve done. It doesn’t mean it was okay to hurt you. It simply means that you have acknowledged the wrong done to you and you choose to move on from it and not dwell on it any longer. If you can forgive your former best friend, you can officially say you broke up with them. Whether forgiving them means reconnecting or leaving them permanently in your past, the result is the same – peace to you at last.

In an ideal world, bedtime would be a moment of rest and relaxation, but it’s not always that simple. Even if you fall asleep easily, falling asleep usually opens the door to another world — the one inside your head. And while your night vision can sometimes be controlled in cool ways, like through lucid dreaming, it can also quickly become a source of stress when you start worrying about having crazy-alive dreams in waking life.

Especially if your ex keeps popping up in your dreams… Whether your breakup ended amicably or left you unattached and struggling to get over it, your ex is “back” (at least in your mind) and now you can’t Shake the thought of her even when you’re awake. So what does it mean for your real life when your former flame keeps seeming to invade your sleep? Surprisingly, experts say this isn’t necessarily a sign that you have unresolved issues and/or want to get back together with them. Dreaming about an ex—even one you haven’t seen in years—is normal, and it’s usually about something else entirely. Here psychologists and a dream analyst explain the most common reasons for this.

Your ex is just a symbol.

“Humans have been trying to make sense of their bedtime visions long before recorded history,” says Gary Toub, Ph.D., senior training analyst at the C.G. Jung Institute in Colorado. “The biggest mistake you can make when trying to interpret a dream is to think it’s actually about the person you just dreamed about,” Toub said, because dreams are symbolic. Instead, he says, focus on the hidden content of your dream. “Your subconscious or your dream chooses the best possible representation for something it is trying to symbolize. So if the content is about your ex, you need to look at how that ex symbolizes something in you.”

The dream is actually about you… not your ex.

Think of the people in your dreams as vessels for your emotions. “You are the one who created your dream. It’s like a work of art of your emotions and represents all parts of you,” says Marion Frank, a psychologist specializing in dream analysis and relationships in the Philadelphia area. “Dreams help us process emotions by encoding and constructing memories of them. What we see and experience in our dreams may not always be real, but the emotions associated with those experiences are,” says Frank.

Research from the UC Berkeley Sleep and Neuroimaging Laboratory uncovered evidence linking emotions and dreams. The study found that a reduction in REM sleep led to a decreased ability to understand complex emotions in daily life. If you’re dreaming about your former love, even if she was an abusive ex, ask yourself, “What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you think of her?” says Toub.

What we see and experience in our dreams may not always be real, but the emotions associated with those experiences are.

“While it may be negative, it’s often those qualities and what they symbolize that point to things about yourself,” he says. For example, maybe you just had a nasty argument with your current significant other — maybe you’ve been misbehaving and the argument you had brings out a side of you that you think is related to how your ex did you treated earlier.

Okay, so let’s say you had a fight with your spouse and then dreamed about sleeping with your ex…

The anger you felt toward your spouse before you went to bed seeps into your subconscious. “Your ex may have been an angry person, but in your dream you have a positive, intimate moment with that person you actually loathe in your conscious world,” Toub suggests.

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The ex probably represents anger, and it’s more likely to be the angry side of you. Toub explains that dreams are about what just happened that day. “All the experiences of the day marinate in your head. The dream is the commentary of what happened until you fell asleep.” Your dream is pointing you to something about yourself.

However, if you have recurring sex dreams about your ex, there is more to discover.

Don’t panic and take it as a sign that you belong with your ex (you broke up for a reason!). “You need to cast a wider net in your life – the sex you’re having with your ex in your dream might not mean your current sex life isn’t great or that you don’t desire the person you’re in. if you’re a couple,” Frank says. Maybe you just need more intimate connections from your family or friends.

“The repetitive nature of your dream is that your psyche is giving you messages on a different level. Your subconscious is telling you that you don’t fully understand the memo in your conscious life, so consider analyzing the symbols you see in your dream,” she explains. Your dream is like a fax machine that gives you notes about things find out when you’re awake.”Dreams are a form of healing,” adds Frank.

What if your ex cheated on you but you dream that you are both happy?

Your ex cheated on you. Yet here you wake up at 3am, confused because you’ve been walking hand in hand with them on a sunny beach. “So many metaphors happen in a dream, it’s not about one thing, it’s just about the ex,” explains Frank. She says you have to work with the dream to see the layers. For example, where is the place in the dream (the beach), what is the emotion (bliss) and what did you feel first when you woke up (closure?).

Your dream is pointing you to something about yourself.

If you don’t live near a beach and have always associated negative feelings with that person, your dream may be telling you that you are entering a transformational phase in your life. “What do you like about the state of mind you’re in in this dream state, and then try to apply that to your daily life,” she adds. It could mean you’re ready for a change: a new job or the next step with the person you’re dating. The dream may not even be about the betrayal you associate with your ex, but rather the ability to move on and come to terms with your past.

Is it true that when you dream about someone, they dream about you?

no As cute as that sounds, we don’t become mediumistic in our sleep. But Layne Dalfen, dream analyst and series writer, believes people can share an extrasensory connection with someone they’ve been with for a long time. “Although this is not my way of looking at dream analysis, after 48 years of doing it I know without question that we are capable of ESP and we talk to each other all the time – sometimes with words and sometimes with thoughts.”

For example, says Dalfen, she and her husband have been married for 32 years, and she says it’s not uncommon for them to have a similar idea at the same time. “Let’s say I’m lying in bed in the morning and I’m like, ‘Man, I’d like to go to the movies tonight.’ And he comes out of the shower and says to me, ‘Do you want to go? see a movie tonight?’” This, she points out, often happens in synchronous couples.

“You might have similar images in your dreams, but that wouldn’t be a psychic thing to me,” adds Dalfen. After all, there is no reason to assume that they dream about you too. And they certainly wouldn’t have the same dream as you at the same time, like a romantic take on a Nightmare on Elm Street movie. “I’m not buying it,” says Dalfen.

In short, we dream of what worries us most.

This may not explain why you dreamed of eating a plate of stuffed mushrooms when the thought of mushrooms makes you nauseous. However, experts say that you are more likely to dream about an ex than your current partner. “A person from your past life represents something about you in a way that your current partner can’t,” says Frank.

Most people wake up from a dream about their former lover and immediately assume that they must miss that person. Frank explains that what you probably don’t miss is your ex, but an aspect of who you were when you were with him that you long for. Perhaps there is something in your current life that you are unhappy with, or something is weighing you down and you miss the carefree, happy way you lived years ago.

You probably don’t miss your ex. You miss an aspect of who you were when you were with them.

Extrapolate the sentiment of how you felt and lived your life and leave the people involved out of the equation. But how can we tell if we’re really missing the person we’ve been dating in our waking hours? Toub says we can never really know for sure if dreaming of an ex years later is about the actual outside person or symbolizes a part of us. “Dreams are all so personal. I would say that it’s up to the dreamer to decide – to feel for themselves.” If the dreamer decides to move on with the outside person (the ex in this case) and it doesn’t work out then that tells the dreamer that there was really something more subjective about him.

Consider keeping a dream journal to help stop the recurring dreams.

“A dream is the conversation you have with yourself about a very specific current problem that you are trying to solve,” says Dalfen. “Your subconscious gets the solution to what you want to do in a situation before your conscious gets it.”

Because the people and events in our dreams are symbols handpicked by our subconscious, you can learn something by writing down what happened, how it made you feel, and what memories and feelings you associate with the things you dreamed about . Over time, a clearer picture of what to think about through your dreams can form. “The price you get for remembering your dreams and journaling them is that you can advance your problem-solving skills,” says Dalfen.

And if you want to banish that ex from your dream life forever, try this simple trick.

“The way to stop dreaming about your ex, believe it or not, is to ask yourself to stop,” advises Dalfen. “When you fall asleep, or even during the day, just say, ‘You know what? I have enough. I don’t want to dream about them anymore!’ And you probably won’t.”

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Jenna Autuori Dedic Jenna Autuori Dedic is a freelance writer specializing in fitness, health and parenting stories. She is working on a children’s book and enjoys listening to true crime podcasts while she runs. She just renovated the kitchen in her 100 year old Tudor home in Westchester, NY and can’t wait to get back to cooking for her husband and their two children, Evie and Hunter. Jenna is the former fitness editor at Fitness and Shape magazine.

You are not the only one making the whole global pandemic thing worse, there is a surge in people dreaming about their ex. Fear not: COVID-19 has no plans to get you and your ex back together. And no, “dreaming of an ex” is not a symptom of the disease. Certified dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg says that in general (read: pandemic or not), dreaming about an ex is very (very!) normal. Why exactly has the implementation of physical distancing led to an increase in ex dreams? Below, Loewenberg and three certified therapists answer that very question. Plus what 23 different ex-dreams are trying to tell you — if anything. HEALTHLINE CORONAVIRUS COVERAGE Stay up-to-date on the current COVID-19 outbreak with our live updates. Also visit our coronavirus hub for more information on how to prepare, advice on prevention and treatment, and expert advice.

Why the Pandemic Blamed Your Ex Dreams There are a few reasons why the novel coronavirus has caused your ex to end up in your dreams. You Have More Free Time Whether you were recently laid off (condolences) or are simply bored without the gym or bar to fill your off hours, Loewenberg points out that most people have more free time on their hands. “Lockdown has given a lot of people a lot more time to think about their interpersonal relationships — including their exes,” she says. Basically, the dreams are simply a symptom of staying in the past for a long time. You Slept More Than Usual Many people are also spending more hours napping than they did before the pandemic. “Without a morning alert (or with a later alert), many people may now be entering the final phase of their REM cycle during quarantine,” says Loewenberg. And this stage is associated with deeper sleep and dream memory. So not only do you dream more about your ex, you also remember it more often. Pooh. They Mourn “Right now, we are collectively experiencing the loss of life as we knew it,” says Brooklyn-based psychotherapist Aimee Barr, LCSW. “It’s very common for figures from the past to surface during times of grief.” You’re Lonely Even if you’re not quarantining alone, physical distancing has likely caused you to spend a lot less time with people you care about . “It’s normal for the subconscious to return to a point in your life where you could spend whatever you wanted on people who cared about you at the time and vice versa,” Loewenberg says. They’re Anxious “Due to a heightened sense of anxiety and insecurity in our waking life, many of the dreams people are currently having are nightmares,” says Sula Malina, a therapist in training at the Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center in NYC. “That said, many people have dreams that depict another anxiety-provoking situation (like a breakup or a painful relationship).”

It’s usually related to one of these underlying issues. Every dream about an ex is as unique as that ex themselves, but Loewenberg says it generally boils down to emotional dissatisfaction

sexual dissatisfaction

unresolved feelings about the ex or the breakup

released feelings about the ex or this breakup

Exploring Specific Dream Scenarios These wild times have resulted in a long list of wild dreams, ranging from scary to sweet to violent. Below we go over the most common ones. If It’s a Long-Term Ex “Dreaming of a long-term ex–especially first love–is incredibly common,” says Loewenberg. “This ex becomes a symbol of passion, unbridled desire, unabashed love, etc.” These dreams are your subconscious’s way of telling you that you want more ~spice~ in your life. When it comes to a recent ex, it seems like your subconscious is trying to sabotage all the hard work you put in in your waking hours to get over that person. On the contrary, Loewenberg says, “Your subconscious is actually trying to help you heal and process how you’re feeling about the breakup.” If You’ve Been Abusive To dream of an abusive or toxic ex (think: physical or mental abusive, serial cheaters, etc.) is a very common trauma response, says Malina. According to Loewenberg, if you’re dreaming about an abusive ex, it’s probably because in your waking hours you’re still trying to find a W-H-Y behind what happened. If during waking hours you are “beating yourself up” about that past relationship, the dream could symbolize the abuse you are now subjecting yourself to by rumination. If you miss them or they miss you What qualities did your ex have that you’re missing in your life right now? For example, if your ex was funny, set up a Zoom date with another funny friend. What qualities did your ex bring out in you? Time to use these without your ex’s help! If you want them back or they want you back again, think about the qualities you liked about your ex or the qualities your ex had when you were together that you want back in your life! If someone apologizes to an ex in your dream ≠ your ex is really sorry IRL! Rather, it’s just your brain conjuring up a scene that features exactly what you wish your ex would have said. And if you’re the one apologizing? Chances are you’ve done or said something recently that you regret. The dream = your first attempt at redemption. When someone confronts the other about past mistakes “When you have a dream in which you confront someone, you are confronting the part of you that was hurt by that person,” says Loewenberg. “It’s your way of slowly coming to terms with how you were hurt.” If you’re getting babes back together, it’s time to look deep and consider whether or not you would actually get back with an ex, should they cringe . If you want, it’s time to remember why you broke up in the first place. They were probably damn good reasons! (This is where a therapist or protective BFF can be very helpful). However, if you have ZERO interest in that ex in your waking hours, the dream is a sign that you have made peace with the relationship and learned the lessons you had to learn from it. Exciting! When you fall in love again, says Loewenberg, it indicates that you long to feel cared for and loved now. Pretty damn understandable wish in the middle of a pandemic, right? If you get physical aka kisses, touches and the like. In dreams, sex = connection. So, it’s time to check if you really want to reconnect with that ex. This is another instance where it can be helpful to make a list of the reasons for the breakup. Loewenberg adds, “When you have a child together, it’s not about sex or kissing, it’s about bonding for the good of the child.” Good to know! If you have a child together Don’t take a pregnancy test just yet! In dreams, children represent promise and new growth. Here the dream probably means that your ex will allow you to give birth to a new part of yourself. If you’re struggling “Dreams like this suggest that there is a current conflict in your life,” says Loewenberg. Given that we’re all going through major routine upheavals right now, this is normal. If someone is cheating on the other “If your ex has indeed cheated on you and you have dreams that he is cheating on you, it is a sign that you are bringing distrust into your current relationship,” says Loewenberg. “If you dream that you did it even if you didn’t, then there’s probably something about your current relationship that’s making you feel like the third wheel.” Think: the Xbox, the TV show or the kid. If you break up again Was the breakup recent? Calm down! You are still processing. Was it a while ago? Ask yourself what else in your life is making you feel rejected. Have you recently been made redundant due to COVID-19? Has one of your BFFs started texting or calling a lot less? If they’re in a new relationship Cool, cool, so deal with the fact that your ex will (or is already) moving on. Conclusion: time for you too! Whether they are in danger Depends on whether you are trying to save them or not. If you’re playing the knight in shining armor, there’s probably a lesson you need to take away from the relationship. For example, has your ex brought out your extroverted side? Your subconscious is reminding you to tighten your schmoozing muscle IRL. If you haven’t tried to save her, that is actually a sign that you are letting go of this relationship. boo-bye! If they died, congratulations! This dream indicates that you have let go of the past and you are ready to move on. If they kill you murder = forced end. Ask yourself: During my relationship with my ex, did I lose a part of me that I want to get back? For example your: trust

ability to trust

Confidence If you kill her Sayonara baby! You are probably having this dream because you have killed all the lingering bitter feelings you had towards your ex. However, if you still carry a lot of anger towards your ex, this dream could indicate that you still have a lot of anger and hurt to process.

Exploring Pandemic-Specific Dream Scenarios Usually, the thought of seeing an ex-IRL is a nightmare… So why, now that there’s no chance of seeing him, is he making its way into your coronavirus dreams? Let’s investigate. If you are single and dreaming about them, don’t miss your ex. You miss human interaction! And feel loved! And kisses! Loewenberg recommends thinking (though not for too long) about this ex’s positive qualities. Your subconscious might compile a list of qualities you want to look for in a partner once that *wave around* is over. If you are in a relationship but isolated alone and dreaming about them How did your ex make you feel in your dream? Sexy, adored, groomed or special? Time to plan a digital date night with bae. Your subconscious is telling you that you’re feeling a little neglected right now. If You’re Isolation With a Current Partner and Dreaming About Them Again: How Did Your Ex Make You Feel? If it’s something positive, it’s probably been a minute since your quarantine baby made you feel that way, and you miss that feeling. As Barr says, “Now that people are together 24/7, relationships can feel slightly stale.” She suggests actively planning dates (and tissues) to rekindle the spark. If you dream that you’re developing COVID-19, you still have some ugly feelings towards that ex, says Loewenberg: “Your subconscious uses the virus as a metaphor to show you that you still have something left of your ex, that You need to work through it.” LOL, yes, your ex = the virus. If you’re very over your ex, Loewenberg says, it could indicate that something in one of your current relationships (romantic and/or sexual or not) is feeling unhealthy. Do you become codependent? Do you take each other for granted? Solve after that and the dream will stop.

So… when are these dreams a red flag? According to Barr and Loewenberg: if they become a constant thing (read: nightly or bi-nightly)

when you wake up stressed and find it hard to shake that feeling

when those dreams reflect fantasies you have while awake

What if you’re in a relationship – should you tell your partner? While communication is generally a good thing in relationships, Barr and Loewenberg agree that telling your current boo that your ex-boo is cooling off in your subconscious will do more harm than good. “It’s likely to make your partner insecure and jealous without giving you or him anything,” says Loewenberg. Still, as Jesse Kahn, LCSW-R, CST, the director and sex therapist at The Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center in NYC, says, “There is no ‘should’ when it comes to relationships because every relationship and every person is different. Kahn adds that these questions can help you figure out what’s right for your relationship: Do you want to tell your partner, and if so, what are your intentions and motivations? If you tell your partner, will there be consequences for you or your relationship? How do you feel about these episodes?

How to Talk About It Should you tell your partner the intimate details about these dreams? Probably not. But as Barr points out, our partners are really intuitive. So when you are affected, disturbed or haunted by these dreams, your S.O. probably noticed. Therefore, when your partner asks you what’s going on, Barr suggests sharing the fact that you’ve had some confusing dreams. For example, “I know I’ve been acting great in my head lately. That’s because I had super vivid dreams with scenes from my past, and that disoriented me. But I’m here, I love you, and you don’t have to worry.”

“You’re right, I was in a weird mood. My dreams have been really disturbing lately and they have been haunting my waking hours. I promise to let you know if I’d like to discuss this further.”

How to Address the Underlying Problem While sometimes a dream about an ex indicates an enduring love, resentment, or affection for that ex, this is not always the case! Sometimes it highlights: dissatisfaction in a current relationship

Dissatisfaction with current living conditions

that you moved away from your ex

that you are ready to move on from the ex. Ultimately, your next step depends on what the underlying problem is. Regardless, Barr recommends speaking to a teletherapist. “They can help you figure out why these dreams are happening and develop a concrete plan to help you stop them.”

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There’s no question that dreaming about someone you haven’t seen in a while can feel like déjà vu.

But what if it’s a sign that they’re coming back into your life or want some form of contact?

Still, it can be a little unsettling when people from your past appear in your dreams with no real explanation.

In fact, if it keeps coming up, then there are deeper meanings and interpretations to what it means to you.

Here are the top 10 reasons why you dream about someone you haven’t seen in years.

1) They want a closure and have not yet accepted their absence

It’s hard to accept that someone is no longer in your life physically, and it doesn’t always get easier with time, so sometimes your brain gives you weird dreams to help you accept that they’re not coming back.

If they don’t come back, it’s like saying goodbye so you can move on in life and make your own decisions.

It is a sign that you are ready to end the relationship and that it is time for her to leave.

These dreams help you either process your feelings or accept the fact that they will no longer be in your life.

As the saying goes, “Mind is a powerful thing,” and it is used to make sense of anything that is not right or normal.

2) You worry about their well-being.

You may be concerned about the well-being of someone you haven’t seen in a while, either because you’ve heard they’re ill or in trouble.

This could be because the two of you were close in your past, so it’s natural to worry when things have taken a turn for the worse and they haven’t gotten back to you.

Or when someone died, your brain tries to imagine what happened to them and whether or not you should feel bad about their death.

Dreams about people who are sick or dying can be nerve wracking, so your best bet is to try to remember what they look like in your dreams and let go of the dream instead of dealing with the outcome.

3) You owe them a debt that is unpaid

One thing that can keep you connected to someone is debt.

In some cases, you might even feel like a debtor to a person or relationship that went wrong because it took you both so long to pay off your debts.

This could also be the case when you do something for someone in your heart, but they never reciprocate and don’t feel that way anymore.

In this situation, your mind is reminding you to let go and move on.

Sometimes you feel like someone owes you and they don’t, so dealing with those feelings and the fact that they don’t exist can be an important part of letting go.

In fact, just your name and date of birth can reveal a lot about your life and the decisions you should be making.

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4) You miss her, but you’re too afraid to reach out to her

Missing someone and dreaming about them are two very different things, but both mean that you are not ready to lose them yet.

It’s safer to stay where you are, or better yet in most cases – avoid going back to where you used to be.

This is especially true if the person in your dreams is not necessarily someone you wish to see again or not be found.

That way you don’t have to deal with your feelings towards them and you can just move into your new life.

Sometimes when you’re missing someone and dreaming of a place where memories were made, your brain is destined to dream of those old places and people that keep you both close.

5) You feel guilty for not calling her back or visiting her sooner

Guilt is another emotion that doesn’t just stop when your relationship with someone is over.

Sometimes you think you did something wrong or didn’t pay enough attention to someone, and this can lead to guilty dreams.

In this case, the dream could be reminding you that it is important for you to keep in touch with them as much as possible so that you don’t feel bad about not being there for them when they need it the most.

Dreams can be a very powerful way to share feelings, seeing someone or something in your dream and acting as a medium for your mind to convey the message it is trying to convey.

6) You worry about that person’s legacy and how they will be remembered

You may also dream of someone who is long gone because you want to make sure they get the recognition they deserve.

You try to cherish the memory of their life and what they did for you and how it affected you.

Just as you want to protect your loved ones and be there for them in times of need, this is another reason why your sanity will bring them back to your dreams.

In this case, you may want to actually write down your dreams or take mental pictures of objects in your dream so that you can record them for later.

Perhaps you will find that they contain more hidden messages than you can imagine at the moment.

7) You’re in a new relationship and you’re hanging by a thread because of the person from your past

This dream may seem silly, but it can be a form of foreboding.

You may be in a new relationship with someone you are still undecided about and that is why you see that person in your dreams.

You’re not sure if they’re right for you, so your brain tries to make it seem like an unsettling and scary situation so you can figure out if they’re right for you or not.

In that case, it’s best to go back and look at the past of the two of you together and really ask yourself how you feel about each other.

If there are still feelings, then maybe this dream is telling you what kind of relationship is coming your way.

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8) You feel a sense of urgency that you both need to reconnect

You dream of hanging out with someone from your past or even going on a date, but you don’t know how to go about it and it seems impossible at the moment.

There is a certain level of hesitation that makes you worry about hurting their feelings because they aren’t as fond of you anymore.

If you know that getting that person back into your life will be almost impossible, then it’s best to just let them go and move on.

Think about your new life and make it the best it can be so you don’t have to worry about what happens to the person you have to leave behind.

You can’t force that person to do something they don’t want or make them fall in love with you if they don’t want to.

9) You’re finally over her and want to move on

If you’ve been dreaming about the same person for months, it could be that you’re finally ready to move on from that relationship, friendship, or business deal.

As you start moving forward with your life and creating new memories, your brain will begin to put the old ones to rest. You must let them go as part of your new life.

This is also a sign that you are finally ready to end the old relationship and move on with a happy new life.

It’s hard to let go of someone when you’re still holding on to their memory, but if you see them in your dreams sometimes, give yourself a nod and know it’s time to finally move on.

You can do that!

10) You try to come to terms with her death

You may dream about someone before they died but you are still trying to sort out their death and how it all happened.

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This can be a way for you to emotionally process what happened and grieve if you feel like something bad happened.

Keep in mind that you are grieving or are still finding out the details of what happened.

If you dream about someone who has died, then there are probably some unresolved feelings you have about them or things they said or did that still trouble you.

You may want to work through those thoughts and find a way to come to terms with her death before you can really move on.

The reason your brain gives you these dreams is to try to help you understand and deal with the pain you are struggling with right now.

Let’s try to analyze these reasons a little further

We forget people all the time, especially when they are long gone from our lives.

Everyone forgets someone every day and it’s nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about.

It could also be that you were very busy with other things and didn’t have time to see them, but your mind still has something to say about it.

Sometimes dreams are a way for us to sort out our problems and find new ways of looking at things.

In these cases, the dream could be an important reminder that you need to get back together soon or even take a break from your daily routine so you can spend some much-needed time with your loved ones.

Some dreams are just trying to break a kink in your relationship and make you realize how important it is for you to spend more time with that person (and maybe see them more often).

If you are dreaming about someone from your past, it could also be related to them wanting to apologize for something or maybe they want you to tell them about what happened in your life.

Another reason you might do this is because you feel like you need closure with this person and you are tired of being stuck over what happened in the past.

When you feel that something has gone wrong in your relationship, your brain will give you these dreams to resolve what happened and move forward.

Dreaming about an old lover you haven’t seen in years

It’s normal to dream about people you haven’t seen in years, even if you were once close. It’s usually because your brain is trying to sort things out and fixate your feelings on a specific person in your life.

This allows you to learn more about the person, see what they did, or find out how things went wrong between the two of you.

Sometimes, dreaming about people you used to love dearly can be a way for your brain to let you know that it’s time for you to put things in perspective and learn from your past.

Don’t be afraid of your dreams, no matter how silly they may seem. They try to give you positive feedback about the direction of your life so that you can live it better than before.

We all have dreams about people we haven’t seen in years, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you need to reach out to them or try to bring them back into your life.

Sometimes it’s just easier to let go of the past and look forward to creating a better future for yourself.

Dreaming about lovers from the past can also be a way for you to process some of the old feelings you may have.

You may have unresolved feelings about something or feel like they did something wrong to you and it’s time to move on.

If this is the case, it’s important that you remember who they are and what they did to you so you don’t repeat their mistakes in the future.

Dreaming about a colleague you haven’t seen in years

To dream of a colleague you haven’t seen in years can help your brain deal with the changes in your life and how they are affecting you at work.

For example, if that person has risen in their job and you feel like they left you behind, it can be difficult to come to terms with because it’s something that sets them apart from everyone else.

On the other hand, if you haven’t seen that person because they moved away, then your brain will bring them back into your dreams for you to find out and deal with before you see them again.

For example, if they were in love with you before they left but couldn’t tell you before they moved far away, then the dream could be a way for them to apologize for being too shy to talk to you to say something in real life.

Dreaming about a family member you haven’t seen in years

In most cases, if you haven’t seen someone in a while, it’s because they’ve moved away and you’re too busy to visit them.

However, there are times when dreams about people we are close to can be a way for our brain to let us know that our lives are in need of serious changes.

In many cases, the reason why dreams about family members recur so frequently is because your brain is trying to tell you something about yourself.

In most cases, having a lot of dreams about your family members can be a way for your subconscious to help you deal with some of life’s big problems.

The reason these dreams are so important is because they help you get in touch with your emotions and release what is going on inside.

Dreaming about a deceased friend

Sometimes our dreams can seem so real that we have a hard time distinguishing between what is real and what is not.

If someone has recently passed away and you are still in the grieving process, then it is normal to see them in your dreams.

This can be a way for you to release some of your unresolved feelings and process those things before beginning the healing process.

It’s also a way for your brain to make you feel like they’re still there, even when they’re not.

But I understand that dreaming about someone who has died can be difficult, especially if you were already in a strained emotional state.

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Dreams about an old high school classmate

If you were close in high school, or maybe had an emotional connection with them, then it’s normal for your dreams to feel a lot like the real world.

That’s why you dream about things that might seem silly to others, but only you know what it was like to be at school with them.

Dreaming about a classmate can often help your brain overcome your feelings for him or her. This is especially true if the two of you were close and maybe even in love with each other before high school ended.

Graduation dreams usually symbolize how you feel not being able to celebrate that milestone with that person.

This is because your brain patterns and thoughts are stuck in the past and your subconscious is still trying to make sense of the things that happened.

In most cases, dreams about people from the past offer us a way for our subconscious to help us deal with these issues and get out of our way of life.

Final Thoughts

Sometimes dreams are just trying to clear things up in your mind because we are forgetting things or getting distracted by other people’s problems, which confuses us as we move forward with our lives.

Dreams are not always a bad thing and they want to help us organize the problems of our daily life so that we can understand what is really going on in our mind.

If you’re having trouble understanding your dreams or are still unsure about anything in your life, then don’t hesitate to seek professional help so you can start solving the issues that are causing it in the first place.

This can help you get all of your thoughts out of your head and into a space where you can finally work through them and decide what to do about them.

I recommend speaking to the folks at Psychic Source.

Not only can they give you more direction on how to deal with dreams about people you haven’t seen in a while, but they can also give you advice on what’s in store for your future.

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1. Remove them from your social media.

Every time you come across her name in your newsfeed, your heart sinks deep into your chest. All the raw emotions return with a vengeance and you feel a familiar sickness settle in your stomach. Keeping that person on your social media can and will only hurt you. I recommend locking to hide the temptation to crawl. Whatever is going on in your life should no longer concern you or interest you.

2. Delete their phone number.

Drunk phone calls or texts will be your worst enemy. Save yourself the embarrassment (and dignity) and just remove their number from your phone. You have no reason to contact her when she is sober and you want to keep your drunken feelings away from reality. In the ideal circumstances where they feel the desire to reconnect with you, they will. But in the meantime cut the phone lines immediately.

3. Stay away from passive aggressiveness.

The temptation is great, especially at the beginning of the breakup. BUT RESIST! You’re only going to make yourself look like the bad guy if everyone sees you keep tweeting about this “stupid person who NEVER deserves friendship.” Yes, we know who you mean. And it’s more than likely that the message will get back to them. Not good.

4. Bleed if you must, then release.

It’s never a good thing to bottle up strong emotions, so it’s healthy and natural to share your inner feelings with a small group of trusted people. However, constantly bitching about your ex-boyfriend can make you feel worse instead of better. If the hurt feelings are fresh, talk and scream and scream and cry – get it out of your system! And then clean your slate and leave that person behind. Because talking bad about them only hurts one person: you.

5. Make a positive list of reasons why you are feeling better.

Some people cope better with heartbreak when reminded of the good things that come from a bad situation. By making a list of reasons why things can get better for you and your life in this new future, this can be the little boost you need to move forward in your life and leave the toxic people behind forever .

6. Remember the true friends you still have in your life.

In times of loss and hurt, it’s easy to forget the great things that still surround us. You may have lost a close friend, but think of the people who still have your back, love you, and are ready to help you get back on your feet. A lost friendship doesn’t mean you’ve lost everything. Always remember to count your blessings and appreciate what (or who) you still have in your life.

7. Cheer up.

A broken friendship is a huge ego buster. But make a conscious effort not to lose confidence or fall short of your true potential. Just because one person misses out on the great person you are doesn’t mean every person in your life will do the same. Nurture your battered confidence, but make sure you bounce back twice as fast.

8. Never stoop to their level.

Unfortunately, not all friendships end well. In fact, most never do. Sometimes people use malice or revenge to hurt you and get you to react. These people might spread rumours, try to get people to “take their side” and dislike you, and do everything in their power to keep you angry and hurt. If you feed these people, you will always lose. Their goal is to hurt you and make you look bad, and once you get revenge, they win. So what are you doing? Nothing! Yes, it’s definitely easier said than done, but it will only benefit you positively in the long run. Not only will you be the better, more mature person, but you’ll show people the real you (and not those nasty rumors) – actions speak louder than words!

9. Be kind.

If you live in a small town or go to the same school or maybe even have the same group of friends, there’s a good chance you’ll end up running into this person. Try to resist the urge to stare at them from across the room or let people nearby know what a terrible person he or she is. Now you don’t have to run over and hug her tight like nothing ever happened; You should be true to yourself and your feelings, and you probably don’t agree with what happened. But if they say hello, say hello back. Be polite. Be polite. It doesn’t mean you are wrong and insincere. Being polite is simply a choice of propriety. You are both human, you deserve to be recognized as such.

10. Forgive them.

Wait! Don’t roll my eyes just yet. I know this is another easier said than done tip, and it’s far from easy. But when it comes to truly moving forward from a broken friendship (or anything, for that matter), forgiveness is key. Forgiveness doesn’t mean they’re off the hook for what they’ve done. It doesn’t mean it was okay to hurt you. It simply means that you have acknowledged the wrong done to you and you choose to move on from it and not dwell on it any longer. If you can forgive your former best friend, you can officially say you broke up with them. Whether forgiving them means reconnecting or leaving them permanently in your past, the result is the same – peace to you at last.